I have no idea how I fell down the stairs. My feet didn’t stumble nor was it my fear of heights but my head spun all of sudden making fall.
But when I slowly opened my eyes I saw people circling around . Aaron was screaming at people while a doctor just entered through the room to check up.
"W-what is going on?" I asked and got up from bed.
"Ayla, why did you get up!! Keep lying, the doctor will do your check-up thoroughly", Aaron said but he sure was panicked in a way.
I didn’t lie down but the doctor checked up on when she placed the stethoscope on my stomach, making feel the sa way as when I used to go on a regular check-up when I was about to give birth to Ayla.
"Doctor, am I?" I asked in a low tone. I do feel the desperation growing inside just having the thought of being pregnant for the second ti.
"Yes, Miss. Ayla"
"You are correct. You are pregnant", she said, making my world blow.
No one heard her saying it was only but when Aaron ca and asked, "What happened to her? Tell how’s she? Is it serious?"
He asked in panic but I stopped the doctor to tell him.
"You can go now, I will tell him," I said letting her out of the room. I even kick everyone out of the room except Aaron.
"Ayla, what are you doing?"
"You just woke up, why are you walking?" He kept asking questions.
I didn’t answer but quietly ca and laid down on the bed covering myself with bedsheets.
"Ayla, you ok?"
"Why are you not telling what happened?"
"Is it sothing bad?"
"Are you hiding sothing?"
His questions went wild, making annoyed.
I got up and pulled him by his collar and whispered, "You are going to be a dad again."
I don’t know how he is going to react as this is the first ti I got to express my happiness to him.
He stayed quiet for a long ti making feel scared.
"What? You’re not happy?" I kept on asking but he hugged all of sudden making my shoulder feel wet.
"A-Aaron, are you crying?" I asked.
"Shh, don’t say anything."
I didn’t say anything for a while but he kept on holding right then he spoke at last.
"I m sorry"
"I’m sorry for giving you lots of pain all these years."
"I didn’t know you being alone was so tough."
"I didn’t know I caused you lots of pain alone when I should be the one with you in your hard tis."
"I know when a child is born she needs both parents’ support but I made you handle all the pain which is not for you but for ."
"I’m really sorry."
I patted his back.
So he was already holding the words I said before I faint. I said because I wasn’t able to bear the pain which I spend alone but sohow I know it’s not his fault if it’s not for the misunderstanding.
"I’m really sorry."
He finally raised his head while he was looking nothing but like a puppy, I wanted to cuddle and love like crazy. I licked his tears. I kissed his eyes. I kissed his cheeks. I kissed his lips as if this is the mont I could drown myself into.
"I love you", he told again.
But again he ca down to my stomach and kissed as if he was kissing the unborn child who is growing inside slowly.
"Baby, I don’t know how much I made your mom suffer but I will try to make her suffer less from now on. I will try to make her happy as much as I can do. But I hope this ti I will get to spend ti with you." he talked to the child who maybe looked like a bud right at this mont.
"Ayla, you think he can hear?" he asked.
"He? How did you know it was going to be him?" I asked.
"I’m not sure but I hope it’s going to be a boy ."
Is this a father’s instinct?
"What do you say? Do you want a boy or a girl?" he asked but I thought for a long ti.
"What are you thinking?" he asked.
"No, it’s nothing", I ignored.
"You are again hiding sothing from ?" He caught this ti even though I tried so hard to hide.
"Baby, tell what are you thinking?"
"Did you start hating now?"
"Am I no good for you?"
He spoke in a sad voice, making feel hurt.
"I don’t hate you but what if I say I no longer want to give birth?" I know a mother shouldn’t think like this but when I imagine the pain all over again I feel chills.
"You don’t want to?" His voice sounds cold. I knew it. Yeah, I knew I would get this reaction but why does no one understand my pain? When I was pregnant there was not a single person I wanted to be near and now too.
"Can you go out?" I spoke in a low tone.
"Ha?" his sound surprised.
I raised my head and brought a force to my face.
"I want to be alone", I said while I can’t say just how my heart kept on breaking inside.
"A-Ayla", he tried to call my na but I stopped him.
"I just want to sleep", I said and locked the door when he went outside.
Why?
Why?
Why?
It’s not like I wanted to say I don’t want to let my child co into this world but I just wanted to hear his opinion when I said it is tough for . But how could he be so cold as if the child is more important than being in this world?
I know I’m trying to be jealous of my child but what about ?
I started walking toward my bed when I heard a knock on my door.
I again walked toward the door and opened it when I found Ayla standing outside holding a chocolate pack in her hand.
"What is it, baby?" I asked.
"I thought you would like chocolate as it’s your favourite too." She stretched her hand toward but I picked her up instead and brought her inside.
"Woah, I never knew my Ayla is so grown up that she wants to give her chocolate to ", I teased her.
"Of course, Ayla is fully grown up and now Ayla will take good care of mommy Ayla so she won’t feel pain or cry," she said, wiping the tears from the corner of my eyes.
"Baby, you love a lot right?" I asked.
I asked hoping she would take Aaron’s na but she said, "Yes mom I love a lot."
"I love you to the moon", she extended her hand to explain how she loves which made feel so full.
"So now when you are grown up will you share your chocolate with your brother too?" I asked
"Brother? But I don’t have one", she said while I said, "There will be a little brother or sister in a year so will you be a big sis for them?" I asked.
Her eyes sparkled.
"Brother? I’m going to have a brother? Woah, so cool."
"All my friends at school have brothers or sisters so I’m going to have one now?"
She sounded so excited.
"So when am I going to et him?"
"When can I play with him?"
"Mom, tell !!!"
She is more excited than I can imagine.
"Soon, so keep waiting", I kissed her forehead while she still looked so excited.
"Ok now I’m going to buy everything as two so that there will be everything when I get to et him ok?" she asked.
"Yes baby you can", I chuckled and made her lay beside .
She slept instantly as if she was so tired, which is my fault as well.
I was too tired to sleep but hunger kicked in.
My stomach started gurgling, making feel embarrassed.
"Gosh, I’m so hungry", I touched my stomach.
"Baby, are you hungry too?" I asked, touching my stomach.
I unlocked the door and walked toward the kitchen. But sohow this ti I didn’t feel any sort of fear walking down but I felt so confident as if the baby saved .
As I was about to check for sothing to eat I saw soone else there too.
"Chloe?" I called out to her, making her startled.
"Ayla?"
"What are you doing here?"
"No no how did you co down? Is Aaron with you?"
She asked plenty of questions, making chuckle.
Maybe this is the normal conversation we had in their months.
"You are so cute", I can’t believe I said it.
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