Synopsis

JosephSullivanisatanall-timelow.Helosthisjob,hisfiancéedumpedhim,hemovedbacktotheMidwestandcurrentlylivesinhisparent’sbasement—oh,andhisworkoutwasjustinterruptedwiththearrivaloftheSystem.Earthhasbecomeaplayingfieldinacontestamongstthegods,wheremortalsarethepawns.Thewinninggodgetstheglory,andtheirchosenchampiongetsasinglewish.Thefirststageofthisgame:Tutorial–ClassSelection.Providedtheidealstatarrayforaphysical,combat-focusedclass,thechoiceforJoeisobvious.UntilhefatthumbstheselectionscreenandendsupselectingSpellcaster.HisstartingIntelligencestat?1.Withauselessclassselectionandonlyhisrawtestosterone-fueledstrengthtobackhimup,Joedecidesclassoptimizationisfordummies.PumpingallstatpointsinStrength,hehopestonotonlysurvivethecontestofthegods,buttowinthewholedamnedthing.Afterall,arealwizardshouldbemeasuredbyhowmuchtheycanbench!