Chapter 291: Middle Of Nowhere 2 (Ch.291)
The snow peaked mountain lood up ahead, at this distance, the mountain was now completely visible and Neveah slowed down as she covered the final lap.
Her fur was completely covered in snow, so of the cold flakes had lted over her fur and the chilling liquid seeped in, spreading it’s cold chill deep and fast.
Cold as it was, Neveah did not find it botherso or unsuitable. Instead, the snow, the chill and the whistling winds all felt oddly familiar and equally comforting.
It could have just been Neveah being accustod to being in her own company, or it could have been sothing more that she was yet to understand.
But whatever it was, Neveah did not dwell on it. Neveah bounded to a stop at the base of the mountain, shaking vigorously to get the snow out of her fur.
’That Veah, is what you call a run...I bet your tiny legs would have us still as far back as where we began.’ Neveah’s wolf taunted, her tone light and excited.
It had been such a long ti since Neveah had heard such genuine excitent in her wolf’s tone.
Neveah knew her wolf did not get nearly as much freedom as she needed and Neveah loathed herself for it...that she was not strong enough to provide her wolf with the unrestrained life she deserved.
Neveah found her wolf’s excitent heartwarming and surely infectious.
’Haha...how amusing.’ Neveah thought back to her wolf who chuckled smugly.
’Could we not just remain this way?’ Neveah’s wolf thought wistfully.
"In wolf form? As pleasant as that sounds, my legs would serve better to make this climb." Neveah thought back, gazing up at the jagged mountain with it’s steep paths.
With much reluctance, Neveah’s wolf receded to the back of their mind and so did her wolf form, in a mont, Neveah stood in her human form, still gazing up at the mountain.
It appeared to be a daunting climb and it brought to Neveah’s mind a climb that had been far more daunting.
Neveah found herself wondering if she would have found this climb easier if she had made the frequent climb up Mount Edar without help.
’You are doing it again.’ Neveah’s wolf thought to her in calm resignation.
’’Doing what?’’ Neveah murmured innocently.
’Thinking of him.’ Neveah’s wolf replied in a matter of fact tone.
Neveah sighed quietly, she could not deny it even if she wanted to. There were many aspects of Neveah’s life that was not within her own control and as much as Neveah hated to admit it, Xenon was one of such aspects.
’’I try not to...’’ Neveah began.
’’I would like to believe I do a good job of it...but it does not feel like it. It does not feel like I am truly getting past him, Or like I ever will be.’’ Neveah admitted.
If she could tell the truth to no one else, she could at least tell it to herself.
’’That is to say... You believe he is the one?’’ Neveah’s wolf asked doubtfully.
’’That is to say...I have no idea what I...we are doing.’’ Neveah replied with a heavy sigh.
Neveah’s wolf fell quiet and when she did not speak even after a long mont had passed, Neveah knew she had said the wrong words.
’’I am not saying my decision has wavered. I know Narx is the right choice and it is not just about what he can do for us... I have begun to care for him. I know you do too, that is why you chose him.’’
’’I love who I am with narx and I know these feelings will grow, yet...’’ Neveah trailed off, not sure of what to say.
’’Yet you also care for another... And so it feels wrong.’ Neveah’s wolf completed.
Neveah expected her wolf to begin a stern lecture on how Xenon was not worth losing narx.
Though it was a lecture Neveah did not need, Neveah knew just how precious narx was...she knew well enough what it would an to lose him over a fleeting dream.
Yet Neveah made no comparisons between narx and Xenon, in her heart, both were precious and whoever she let go off would be an ache she would have to live with forever.
Neveah was surprised at her wolf’s next words which was not the lecture she had expected at all.
’’If we do not find a closure to these lingering feelings, then we will be wronging the only good we have found in dragon keep...narx and Xenon.’’ Neveah’s wolf thought to her.
Perhaps it was the calm that had co from being let out to run free after a long while, but Neveah’s wolf did not disagree or judge Xenon by his wrongs.
She instead ca to the exact conclusion Neveah had for the past few days since that night...to find a right end, a closure.
Sothing, whatever it was that could take away these doubts that Neveah just could not shake off.
’A closure, how does one find that?’ Neveah asked.
’’Where else, if not from him?’’ Neveah’s wolf asked back.
’’What do you an from him?!’’ Neveah hissed, knowing her wolf referred to Xenon.
’’We can only know for sure if we ask the right questions to the right person.’’ Neveah’s wolf replied.
’’What do you suppose is the right question?’’ Neveah asked.
’’Who is Misha? And what story lies behind her mory?’’ Neveah’s wolf replied.
Neveah thought over it for just a mont before she shook her head in firm disagreent, the last ti Misha was brought into the picture... Literally, Neveah had seen a side of Xenon she never wanted to see again.
’’Do you see it? In our heart, there is a side of Xenon that we are not ready to understand or accept. We do not even dare to know of it because we fear it...’’
’’And for as long as we cannot overco that fear, there will always be that feeling of wrong... Does that answer your question?’’ Neveah’s wolf asked her.
’’A side of him that I cannot accept...’’ Neveah murmured to herself.
Neveah knew what it was...it was that side of Xenon that still and perhaps would always love the woman called Misha.
"If I do not dare ask the question... then I have found myself my own answer. Only if I dare ask can I be certain he is the right one..." Neveah murmured beneath her breath.
It was a simple solution to a deeply worrying trouble, and Neveah would have to find the answer to her feelings in her own actions.
"If he is the right one, then we will find the courage to face his past and the truth in his heart. Watch and wait Veah... forever is a long ti, there is ti enough to be certain." Neveah’s wolf thought to her.
Neveah said nothing more, as she walked the short distance to the base of the mountain to begin her climb.
She had no words to say and so it was best she channelled her energy to climb up the mountain.
Neveah reached up, finding her first hand hold...and so the climb began.
It had been a few hours or perhaps more than a few, Neveah was not certain but by the ti she arrived at the first mountain range, Neveah’s muscles ached terribly and her hands were sore and bled.
Sadly, the only piece of her rider’s suit Neveah did not have on before going to bed the night before were her gloves, and no one had cared to put them back on for her.
Neveah was only relieved she had been so exhausted, she did not bother changing out of her rider’s suit into a night dress, otherwise she would have been dumped out here in such flimsy clothing.
’’The thods of the academy are quite brutal.’’ Neveah grumbled beneath her breath.
Neveah’s feet fared better with the protection of the thick boots she still had on and it had been more easier to find footholds than hand holds.
The furious wind at this height blocked out most of the other sounds, Neveah had thought if the wind grew any stronger, she would lose her grip and fall down the great height she had climbed.
Neveah breathed a sigh of relief as she pulled herself up to the first flat surface along the mountain, hurrying away from the edge so she did not end up toppling off.
When Neveah was a safe distance from the cave, she took a seat, rubbing her hands together.
She held them up to her lips and blew so air into them in hopes of warming them up.
After a mont had passed and Neveah had caught her breath, she inspected her surroundings.
Neveah’s eyes soon settled on a cave well hidden in the mountain and Neveah raised a brow.
Rising to her feet, Neveah slowly headed over to the cave, keeping her footsteps slow and quiet.
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