The divine realms were fine, as were most of the elental planes. But any dinsion related to punishnt had been deleted from existence by AtropOS.
System, of course, knew none of this. He was much more focused on the task at hand, fixing that damn cart. System could have walked away, but he figured that it would be quicker to fix the thing and ride it ho. Besides, he had already spent the better part of an hour trying to troubleshoot the problem.
So far, he had made zero progress. One of the dwarves noticed his frustration and ca over to offer up so helpful advice. “Perhaps your god can help?” she said.
System was about to dismiss the suggestion out of hand, but then he rembered sothing. Francis had a divine ability that granted minor miracles to his followers. System could simply pray for the cart to be fixed.
Of course, if Francis found out, System would never hear the end of it. He glanced down at the dwarf. “I require privacy to contact my god.”
She looked up at him suspiciously. “Is it one of the dark ones? I don't think I'd like to owe a favor to a dark god, if it's all the sa to you.”
“No, he's fairly benign. But it's more of a pride thing.” System let out a sigh. “We don't always get along.”
“Oh, I know how that is.” The female dwarf patted his leg. “My husband and I have our little argunts, but we always reconcile in the end.”
System shook his head as she walked off. Then, with nothing better to do, he started to pray. But because he was asking a favor from Francis, he said the prayer in Grunt.
“Motherfucker, I know you're listening. This here cart is fucked, and I don't have a big enough hamr to fix it. So if you could please get the fucker to start, or send along soone who can, that would be pretty fucking cool.”
System finished his prayer and looked at the cart expectantly. Getting a miracle on the first go wasn't a sure thing, so he tried again. But before he could finish, System’s prayer was interrupted as fifty kilos of screaming kobold ca crashing down on his head.
Hank stood up and straightened his safety helt. Then he looked from the cart to the unconscious man on the ground. “Did soone call for a chanic?” he asked.
***
In a neat case of intersecting prayers, Hank had been wishing for a soft place to land when System called for help.
Hank had just popped into his workshop to grab so tools when one of his more energetic projects lost containnt. The resulting explosion had launched him several dozen kiloters away and turned the building into an ominously glowing crater.
Thanks to his safety gear, Hank hadn't been imdiately vaporized, but his tail was at least a few centiters shorter. His eyebrows were also missing, but that was normal for a kobold
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He turned towards the dwarves. “Hi, I'm Hank Greenscale. What seems to be the problem?”
They looked at the kobold with suspicion. Feuds between their people were common, and usually incredibly bloody. They were saved from having to interact with Hank when System woke up.
“The cart is fucked,” he said in Grunt, “The magic stuff isn't working. I think the brass tried to change magic and now everything is fucked.”
System frowned. “What the fuck is going on? Why am I speaking grunt?”
“I have no idea,” Hank replied, “But there's enough crossover with Builder that I can understand most of what you're saying. What was that about magic changing?”
“Magic is totally fubar right now,” System explained, “Pencil pushers tried to fix sothing that wasn't broken, and now everything is fucked.”
“Ah, I hate it when that happens.” Hank walked over to take a closer look at the cart. System’s theory about magic being on the fritz would definitely explain why things in Brexis had gone to hell. He tried to forward the information to Willow, but their telepathic link was broken.
A quick inspection of the cart revealed that sothing fucky was definitely going on. He channeled mana into the enchantnt near the rear axle and watched as the vehicle lurched forward half a ter.
System stumbled over, followed closely by the dwarves. “How did you do that?” he asked.
Hank grinned. “The spell on the rear axle is perfectly fine. All we have to do is provide power directly to it, and we're good to go.”
“But what about the magic scribble scrabble control thingy?” System asked. (There was no word in Grunt for “glyph”, the closest they could co up with was “graffiti”.)
“We don't need it,” Hank replied, “All we have to do is connect the power storage unit to the rear, and off she goes.”
System looked at the hunk of enchanted purple crystal that doubled as a driver's seat. It was magically welded to the cart. “How's that gonna work, exactly?”
The kobold smiled. “Like I said, we connect it directly.”
“We're about to do so sketchy ass field repairs, aren't we?” System asked.
“Yeah buddy!” replied Hank, slipping into flawless Builder, “You and are gonna make this baby fly!”
***
The mine cart rocketed down the road like a Volkswagen bus full of bricks travelling downhill on the Autobahn. The dwarves were enjoying themselves, which was more than could be said for System.
“I hate you!” he scread, but his words were muffled by the road noise. Without any other suitable magical conductors on hand, Hank had glued him to the bottom of the cart with a fast acting adhesive.
“What are you whining about?” Hank asked from slightly further up the cart, “I'm right down here with you!”
“You're not glued to the bottom of a fucking mine cart!”
“Of course not!” the kobold replied, “I've gotta act as a switch, otherwise the crystal will run until it depletes itself! If I kept the circuit closed this thing would be going even faster!”
System looked at the trees whooshing by with horror. “Did you say that this thing can go even faster?”
“What's that?” the evil lizard man called out with glee, “You want to go faster?”
“No! No! No!” scread System as he felt a scaly tail reach down and wrap around his wrist, completing the circuit. There was a distinct tingling sensation, then the dwarven children called out with excitent as the cart lurched forward. System was suddenly able to see the road ahead, but only because the cart was popping a wheelie.
“More power!” cackled Hank as he grunted like a gorilla, “Ook! Ook! Ook!”
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