Good things always ca with the bad. If not imdiately, then shortly after.
Branches and Lellip were going to work out fine. Unless sothing drastic happened, the two would be together for the rest of their lives. It wasn't too surprising, since non-humans usually settled quickly in such a way, but it was a good surprise all the sa. I had honestly expected Branches to cause issues or just not be well received by Nebl's granddaughter. But it seed such worries had been for naught.
And the good didn't end there. Fly was running around acting as much like an owl as the rest, fitting in well as if she had been born into the family. Even the owls that were a tad… more normal, such as the ones who lived amongst humans, were calm around her and nice to her.
Then, to wrap it all up nicely, it seed Crown was doing better too. She looked terrible, compared to how I rembered her, but she was at least active now. There was of course a long way to go for her to return to her forr, normal, self… but at least she wasn't lying in bed all listless as I'd been told.
Basically the owl family was doing fine. Better than most of our mbers, I'd even be willing to say. Right now most of them were a floor below, in the middle of readying for dinner. Since I was here to visit, Lilly wanted to have dinner with the whole family. The whole parliant. Sothing that hasn't happened in years.
I was looking forward to it, even if upset and bothered. Since this would be the first ti I'd get to have such an event with Renn. She and I have had dinners and such with many mbers, and friends, such as Berri and her family but there was sothing a bit special about this upcoming one. Renn personally felt very close to those here, and even had an active connection with many of them. I knew these next few hours for her would be ones she'd rember dearly. The kind of mories that would keep her strong during even the hardest of tis. So I wanted to make sure she got to fully enjoy them, damned the consequences.
I'd deal with the bad after. I'd break afterward.
After…
"Is there no other way, Vim?" Windle asked as I studied the tree from the window.
"Sadly, no. It'll beco more erratic the longer I leave it be," I said gently.
Windle sighed as he leaned back in his chair. We were alone in his little study, I had asked him to write a few letters for since Renn and I would be leaving soon.
She hadn't opened Light's letter yet. I had asked her to wait until after the dinner. After I did what I had to. She had not been very happy with my request, but had agreed all the sa.
The world could wait.
"Do you… know how it happened?" Windle asked softly.
"No," I told a small lie. "Its mind is afflicted… by so kind of outside power. It might not be intentional, but it also might be," I said.
"How does one… afflict such a creature?" Windle asked.
I tried not to let my annoyance show as I turned to face the owl who was too smart for his own good. He knew I was beating around the bush, and was trying to see if I'd answer in other ways if given the chance. He was searching for answers, and not only did I not bla him for such a desire… I knew he also deserved them. He and his wife were both loyal and good people. They deserved answers. I owed it to them. To give them answers as to both explain why their ho was in danger and also as to ease their worries.
Giving them such answers wasn't just justified… it was needed.
It'd not take much either. Just a few words… a few small bits and pieces of the truth of the world. And it'd be easy to give them it too.
But I didn't want to.
It was ti I started treating the gods as I used to. As enemies ant to be destroyed, but also respected.
The less people knew of them the better. The less they knew the safer they'd be, since they'd not be suspected or targeted.
Though… maybe it was too late for that. Maybe it was all too late.
"It's actually easier than it sounds," I said simply, answering his question.
Windle studied for a mont, and I knew he was thinking the obvious. I could see on his expression that he was upset with for keeping secrets, especially since it concerned his family and their safety.
Gesturing lightly at nothing, I nodded. "The bear has always been a more simpler creature. As I ntioned when you and Lilly got together, the bear would eventually die or need to be killed if it ever beca an issue. Well, it just did," I said.
"And it just so happens to occur at the sa ti all the other oddities spring up," Windle stated.
"I'd be lying if I said they weren't connected, yes," I admitted.
Windle sighed at as he glanced at his desk, and the papers upon it. He'd already written the few things I had asked him to relay to those at SilverCreek. And was likely trying to see if there was any connection between them and our conversational topic. There were, but I doubted he could connect them in any aningful way. I had simply asked him to let Randle and rit know a few small things, such as warning them to keep an eye out for odd creatures.
"Ghosts. Monarchs. Creatures becoming corrupted… what has woken up, Vim? Why now? Is it related to the others returning from beyond the sea?" Windle asked.
Maybe. "I think the main reason they all returned is because of the volcano," I said. Had Renn and Lilly not ntioned to him that I'd been encountering gods? He had not included them in his statent.
Windle looked up at , and frowned. "Volcano…? The one that sends us into the long winter?" he asked.
I nodded. "Celine foresaw it, as have others in their own way, but I had thought it hundreds of years from now. But…" I shrugged, deciding there was no point in talking in much depth about prophecies and their lies.
"And here I thought it was because Renn had shown up finally," Windle said simply, interrupting .
My eye twitched. "Must you say it that way?"
"Am I wrong…? Lilly told about the prophecies rit and Renn found, confirming our suspicions," Windle said.
"I hope you've not said such a thing in front of Renn…" I said worriedly. She already blad herself for such odd things, the last thing I needed was for Renn to think that all this chaos was because of her.
Windle scoffed at . "Hardly. But I doubt anyone needs to, Vim. I'll admit I don't interact with her much, letting them all enjoy themselves, but even from the little I've spoken with her and seen there is no denying or doubting her intelligence. If you actually think that Renn isn't smart enough to connect the dots herself then you don't know your wife well at all," he said.
My eye twitched again. "So you and Lilly knew then? All this ti?" I asked.
He frowned softly but nodded. "I hadn't, but Lilly had. Celine had told her of Renn, and had even sent her on missions to search for her supposedly."
What…?
My head felt numb as Windle leaned forward and picked up his pen again. "It's why we had not been shocked when she showed up the first ti. Otherwise Lilly would have killed her on the spot… I an really, Vim, didn't you ever find it odd?"
Yes. But I had ignored it.
Lilly had indeed allowed Renn into her ho, even though she slled of death. Typically that would have not been sothing to happen.
Which ant…
"I'm going to leave now before you or I say sothing that makes break sothing," I said as I turned. I wasn't willing to think, let alone talk, about this anymore.
Windle chuckled at . "I apologize," he said as I left his office.
I huffed at him, and myself, as I was forced to accept the fact that everyone had likely known since the beginning.
rit had known. Lilly had too. Brandy and the others had as well. It wasn't just Celine and her flock, but… everyone…?
Has everyone known? This whole ti? Has Berri…? Had…
I slowed as I neared a stairwell, as I realized sothing obvious.
Tosh had been odd when he first awakened not too long ago. He had called Renn my wife. Even though back then she and I had not even been as close as we are now. Back then Renn hadn't been introducing herself as my wife, far from it. In fact she had gotten unsettled over his misconception. To the point that she had even gotten embarrassed when he had said such things around her.
His misunderstanding hadn't been a misunderstanding at all, had it…? That hadn't been so ailing mind waking from a long dream and making a silly mistake… that had been a mixture of past knowledge and blurred reason as he regained his sense of self.
He had known. About Renn. By na, and maybe even description. Before he had lost his mind.
Which ant… the Society has known of Renn since before even Tosh had broken. Which was well over a century ago. Maybe even earlier than that…maybe even…
"Vim?" I blinked and watched Lilly walk up the stairs. She gave an odd look as she stepped up next to . She was alone, but I could sll the fresh foodstuff upon her. She had just been with the rest in the kitchens. "You okay?" she asked.
No.
"Dinner ready?" I asked.
Lilly frowned as she shook her head. "Still a bit longer…"
She sounded, and looked, a tad uneasy. I likely had a strange expression on my face, one that had perturbed her. I blinked and shifted a little, and did my best to wipe away whatever she had seen. "Your husband is in his study," I said.
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Lilly gave a soft smile. "I figured. He mistakenly thinks he's doing good by giving us so distance, not realizing his children would prefer him not to," she said.
Oh…? "He had ntioned sothing similar, yes," I said.
"Hmph. Such a fool," Lilly said with a small scoff, but she had a smile on her face as she did so.
She really did love him, didn't she? If any other man would have acted so concerning her and her family she likely would have torn them apart. Yet instead here she was, likely praising him internally.
Hopefully one day Renn can have that sa smile for , when I make such mistakes.
"So… Uh, Vim…"
I focused again on Lilly and nodded. "Hm?" Was she worried again? Had I allowed my thoughts onto my face again? Hadn't felt like it.
"Anything I can do…? For you, I an?"
This ti I knew I couldn't hide my thoughts or emotions as my shoulders slumped ever so slightly. I felt an uneasy sense of being humbled as I slowly nodded. "Thank you, Lilly… but no. For now, at least," I said softly.
The owl gave a sad smile as she shifted, and I watched her roll her shoulder in a way that told if she still had her wings they would have fluttered unsurely. "Okay… you sure?"
Yes.
Reaching over, I gently patted the shoulder of the owl who had, once again, proved why she was one of my favorites. "Thank you, Lilly," I said softly, barely more than whisper, as I stepped around her and headed downstairs.
Leaving Lilly behind, I did my best to not give her a chance to say anything more. My heart was starting to hurt, and I wasn't sure if I could endure much more.
Such loyalty hurt. Especially when it was placed at my feet so purely.
Blinking slightly blurry eyes, I was glad I didn't run into anyone else as I reached the main floor. Down one hall I heard the noisy kitchen, and all the happy voices coming from it… but I directed myself elsewhere. Away from it. Away from the people and noise.
Heading for the front door, I opened it slowly enough to not be heard by even Renn… and after stepping out of the house I shut it just as softly.
Stepping away from the house, I took a deep breath of the fresh forest air as I stepped off the porch and onto the grass. It was the thick and lush kind, the type that was so soft one could sleep on it even with a stiff back. I knew from personal experience that it was comfortable. Not that I planned to sleep anyti soon.
Walking towards the large tree located in the center of the field, I tried to settle an unruly mind. It was difficult, especially since I couldn't decide how I wanted to do it.
Should I think of Renn? Her wry grin upon seeing earlier? Or the way her ears twitched wildly when I had asked her to not open Light's letter yet?
Instead maybe I should think of Lilly's gentle loyalty. Her friendship. One that has lasted since I first t her, all those years ago…
What had I done to deserve such loyalty, I wonder? If I had asked her just now to join into battle, to march against the very things that had once created her and her people… she would have done it. She would not have hesitated to agree.
Just how did I earn such friendship? And how could I ever repay it properly?
"How do I replace the bear…?" I asked the world softly as I neared the tree.
I had to kill it. I had no choice. It was being disturbed by divinity. It was why it had woken up and regained enough conscience of self when I had tapped its head. I had removed the corruption, if at least temporarily. But once that corruption returned it would again lose its sense of reason. And then it would again beco dangerous. Unreliable. The kind of dangerous that left no choice.
Of course I could not tell what had caused that corruption, other than it was clear it was from mana, but the how didn't matter. All that mattered was the…
"Does the why matter either?" I asked myself.
"Doesn't it always?"
Slowly turning my head, I frowned at Renn who was staring up at the massive tree nearby.
She was standing a few feet to my left… and was frowning in a way that told she had likely been walking beside this whole ti.
"Where'd you co from…?" I asked as I glanced around to make sure no one else was here. If I had been so lost in thought that I had not noticed her, then it wouldn't have surprised to see others here too. But there wasn't anyone else, it was just her.
"Hm? I followed you outside, Vim."
So she had. That ant she had opened the front door and followed out after I had shut it. And I had not noticed.
"You should be enjoying the owls, Renn. We'll likely be leaving soon," I said gently.
She nodded as she looked away from the tree and at . "I know. I plan to. But… I wanted to make sure you were okay," she said.
…? "Why wouldn't I be?" I asked.
Renn gave a sad smile as she gestured lightly at . "Are you?"
No. "Of…" I hesitated as I realized I had been about to lie to her. To say to her what I said to everyone else. To pretend. To fake it. As to keep the peace and stop others from freaking out too alongside . But… "No," I decided to say after a mont. "No, I'm not," I admitted.
Renn's ears twitched, almost as wildly as they had earlier when we had been watching the bear leave and return to the darkness. "Because of the bear?" she asked.
"That's the source… but, well," I hesitated again, but realized I needed to just say it. Especially now that I had already basically admitted it. I coughed and made sure, again, we were alone. This ti I even checked the skies, to make sure Sap wasn't flying around nearby. "This ti, it's a tad… more personal," I said.
She tilted her head at . "Personal…?"
Staring into her golden eyes, I found myself feeling oddly relaxed. As if suddenly I was without burden, my shoulders now felt a tad loose. As if I'd been on edge for so ti. Likely had been. "Lilly offered to help . Just a bit ago," I said gently.
Those golden eyes disappeared for a mont as she blinked, and in that small heartbeat where I couldn't see them I panicked. Once they ca back into view I cald down, and felt ridiculous as I did so. "And that bothered you Vim…? That's Lilly. She'd die for you."
Hearing Renn say it so blatantly made my eyes burn again, but I luckily kept the tears at bay. "Exactly, Renn," I whispered.
My wife's lovely lips quivered a little as she studied , and then her shoulders too visibly relaxed as she sighed at . "You're not actually this startled over it, are you Vim…? Really?"
I nodded, since I couldn't do much else.
"Oh, Vim…"
"What…? Don't look at like that," I said as I looked away from her. She was looking at as if she'd just fallen in love with again or sothing. The smile on her face, and the way her eyebrows were upturned and her eyes were gleaming was almost how she had looked back in Lun when I had suggested we na our first daughter Nory. She looked like she was about to weep, but in joy not sadness. Although I was glad to see such emotions on her, I wasn't glad over their source.
Renn's hands, both of them, found my left. She grabbed onto it rather harshly as she giggled at . "Only you would get so upset over soone's love, Vim," she said.
Love…? Yes. I suppose it was a form of it. Lilly's loyalty was indeed a form of love, I could not deny that. But…
"Goes against everything I stand for," I said.
"Mhm… yes. So terrible, for soone to cherish you so much that they'd do anything for you. Terrible indeed," Renn said happily.
It was.
Because I was beyond such things.
I was supposed to protect such people. To suffer for them. To endure what they couldn't.
So why was it that the ones I protected were so obviously trying to protect ? How much of a failure was I that, at least in their eyes, I needed so much help? And what could I do to thank them for their willingness to do such a thing for ?
Especially those like Lilly. She knew so well what I was capable of. She knew the feats I could accomplish, and also the impossibilities I could suffer. So there was no doubt she realized the severity of what she had offered. To help with my troubles, of divinity and the unnatural, was not so small task. It was sothing that no re mortal could realistically do without great sacrifice. And Lilly knew it. Yet she still hadn't hesitated to offer her help. And would have given it had I just asked.
I didn't deserve such fidelity.
Renn stepped closer and one of her hands slithered up my arm. Before I knew it she was clinging to as she giggled. "They're lovely, aren't they?" she asked.
Yes. Almost as much as you are.
I stayed silent as Renn clung to , seemingly enjoying herself as she entwined our fingers and she leaned against . I kept my eyes on the tree before us, looming over us, but only because I knew I'd say or do sothing stupid if I looked at her in this mont.
Taking a small breath, I held it in for a good mont before speaking. "What do I do, Renn…? That bear keeps them safe. It keeps the world around them dark, shielding them. Once it's gone…"
Killing it was needed. Because it was now a threat to them. A real one. Yet by killing it I made them susceptible to new threats. Ones just as real and just as dangerous.
Do I trade one danger for another? Did I have the right to choose, even?
"If you killed the gods, would it fix it?" Renn asked.
"I…" I hesitated again, this ti for a new reason. One I usually didn't have. "I don't know," I answered honestly.
Renn turned a bit as to glance up at , even as she kept her head up against my arm… but I stayed focused on the tree. "How long will it take? For the darkness to go away?" she asked further.
"Not long. A few years at best," I said. At least, based off similar situations I've encountered before. In theory it was already happening. The source of the darkness was not the bear itself, but instead its mother. I had buried the pieces of her all throughout the forest. The only reason her ability lingered was because of her child, once they too were gone the ability would dwindle until it no longer existed.
"So… can't we just solve it by then? Can't you think of sothing else to replace it? Or a way to fix it? That should give you ti, right?"
There was nothing to replace this darkness. Not without resorting to similar divine influences. And that would just negate the whole point. "Nothing that imdiately cos to mind, at least."
"Hm… and I've already overheard Lilly say they won't leave. Even if the darkness does go away," Renn said as she finally leaned back and away from , though only to glance behind us towards the house.
I sighed at that. "I'd not heard that, but I can see her getting hardheaded about that, yes."
"Oh shush, Vim. You can't bla them. They've lived here for so long, and raised all those beautiful people here. Of course they wouldn't want to leave," Renn said.
Yet if they didn't they could lose all of that. Everything they are and were… This forest was surrounded by cities and enclaves. Tens if not hundreds of thousands of humans lived all around this forest, so close it was scary. If the darkness faded, its affect on the more basic creatures such as humans would also disappear... and it'd not take more than a few short years for this whole forest to be surveyed and hunted. This place, this ho, and those who lived here would not last a decade. Even if they were willing to do the unthinkable and slay anyone and everyone who entered. And Lilly would, but it wouldn't be enough.
But Renn was right. Plus it wasn't my place. I couldn't count how many people, in the Society and out of it, that I've had to sit back and watch perish over such things. If it was their will, their desire, then…
Renn then sniffed. A loud one, that made finally glance at her… and sure enough I found her crying. She went to rub her face against my arm, to wipe herself against my sleeve. "You're crying already…?" I asked, dumbfounded. I hadn't even killed the damn thing yet!
"But it's sad!" she argued.
It was, but… "Still…"
"I don't want to hear it from soone who was crying over Lilly's offer of help!" she chided.
My eye twitched as I nodded. Couldn't argue there… "It… humbled , is all…" I groaned.
"It should! They're so wonderful! I… gah…!" Renn made an odd sound as she hiccuped and made a tiny whine of a cry. She reached up to wipe at her face as she spent a few monts crying, really crying. She still clung to my arm, but now for support.
"Mhm… they are."
It was they and those like them that gave reason to be what I was. Those like them that made feel justified in doing all I did, and would do.
In fact it was kind of sad to think that throughout all the years, I could only think of a few handfuls of such peoples. Those I truly and genuinely felt deserving of all I could give, and not just because I owed it to them. I'd protect and dedicate myself to those like Lilly and her family even without my debts, they were that precious.
Especially so now that I had Renn. She loved and cherished them so much I couldn't imagine letting anything happen to them. If she'd weep like this over the re thought of Lilly and her family possibly having to endure hardship over sothing years from now, how would she act if sothing actually terrible happened?
"Co now, any mont now they're going to shout at us and tell us to co have dinner. Do you really want to return with such tearstains? Think of the teasing," I warned her as I patted her on the back.
"You're just worried they'd yell at you," Renn said, chuckling as she did.
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