Lorraine’s POV
Our lips parted, finally, but neither of us moved.
We just stood there, locked in each other’s gaze, as if the world around us had fallen silent. Like the branches above had stopped rustling, the air itself afraid to interrupt whatever this mont was. His breath mingled with mine, uneven, warm, real.
My heart thundered in my chest, louder than it should’ve. And yet he could probably hear every beat.
His hands were still on .
I blinked, suddenly aware of what I’d just done, and my face flushed scarlet. I stepped back quickly, my feet unsure on the uneven courtyard ground. My eyes dropped to the floor, unable to et his anymore.
"I...I’m sorry," I muttered, my voice barely more than a breath. "I don’t know why I did that...."
Before I could finish the sentence, everything blurred.
The wind roared past my ears.
He moved.
So fast I didn’t even see it happen.
One mont I was standing there, dazed and humiliated, and the next....
I was in his arms.
His arms wrapped tight around as he sped through the academy grounds like a hurricane. I barely had ti to gasp before the world turned to streaks of gray stone and forest green. My hair whipped around my face, and I clung to him, confused, breathless, my heart slamming against my ribs.
By the ti I could finally process anything, we were already sowhere else.
A room.
Dim.
Familiar.
Books lined the walls like soldiers. Rich, dark wood. The soft glow of a fireplace casting shadows against the floor.
His study.
The private room he used in the East Wing.
I blinked, trying to steady myself, and finally looked at him.
"Why.... why did you bring here?" I asked, though my voice was shaking, more from what I felt than what I feared.
But he didn’t answer.
Not with words.
He stepped forward.... and before I could move, he pinned against the wall
My back hit the wooden paneling with a soft thud. His body pressed into mine, hard and hot and unrelenting.
And then. his lips found mine again.
But this ti, there was no hesitation.
No confusion.
Only fire.
He kissed like he was claiming sothing he’d been starving for. His mouth moved against mine with desperate urgency, as if he’d been holding back for far too long. His hands tangled into my hair, then slid down to my waist, gripping tighter, like he was afraid I’d vanish.
I couldn’t breathe... but I didn’t want to.
I didn’t want to think. Didn’t want to question.
All I knew was him, his scent, his warmth, his lips moving to the edge of my jaw, to my cheek, to my neck.
I gasped as he pressed a kiss to the sensitive skin below my ear. Then another, just above my collarbone. His teeth grazed my skin, not biting, but claiming, and my whole body trembled at the heat coursing through .
I’d never felt anything like this before.
It wasn’t just hunger—it was a storm.
And he was unraveling e, piece by piece, with every kiss.
My fingers found the fabric of his shirt, curling into it as if I needed sothing to anchor .
Because if he didn’t stop soon, I wasn’t sure who I’d beco.
His hands left the wall behind , but not my body.
With one smooth motion, Kieran lifted again, loke I weighed nothing, and carried across the room. My heart pounded in my throat, eyes locked on his. His expression was darker now. Hungrier. As if sothing inside him had snapped free, and he no longer saw as the girl from the feral dorms, or the one who had dared defy him.
He saw .
And he wanted .
He reached the old, plush leather couch by the fireplace and lowered onto it with a gentleness that contradicted the wild way he looked at .
Then he ca down after .
His knee settled between my legs, caging in. His hands frad my face as his mouth found mine again, more ravenous than before, like he was trying to morize , devour , like I was sothing forbidden and he had just decided to break every rule.
My hands slid into his hair instinctively, curling in the silken strands as I kissed him back with just as much intensity, unable to stop myself even if I wanted to.
)
And I didn’t want to.
Because sothing about this, about him, made feel like I could breathe again
Like I wasn’t drowning in blood and rules and violence.
Like I wasn’t just surviving.
I was alive.
His lips moved from my mouth to my jaw, trailing slow, hot kisses downward. His fangs grazed the base of my throat, and a tremor rippled through as I gasped his na.
"Kieran..."
A low growl rumbled in his chest at the sound of it, primal and possessive. His grip on my waist tightened, pulling closer, like he needed to feel just how much I was affecting him.
Like he needed to feel that I was his.
He kissed the hollow of my neck, then the top of my shoulder, each one slower, softer, as if tasting wasn’t enough anymore, as if he needed to calm the storm he’d unleashed just to breathe.
His forehead pressed to mine. His breath was heavy. His eyes, wild.
And when he finally pulled back just enough to speak, his voice was rough. Barely human.
"I shouldn’t..." he whispered, though his hands didn’t leave my body. "But I can’t stop."
I stared up at him, my chest rising and falling like I’d just run a thousand miles. My lips swollen. My thoughts scrambled.
My voice was small. "Then don’t."
Sothing flickered in his eyes, sothing dangerous and sweet and devastating. Then he leaned down again, his hand cupping my cheek as he kissed slower this ti, deeper
Kieran’s lips trailed back down my neck, slower now, more deliberate, like he wanted to savor every heartbeat between us.
His hands moved with the sa careful intensity, one slipping under the hem of my shirt, fingers brushing against the bare skin of my stomach. I sucked in a sharp breath, every nerve suddenly awake and burning under his touch.
His palm moved upward, tentative at first, until he cupped my breast through the fabric. I gasped softly, my back arching instinctively as heat flared through . His thumb brushed over my nipple, and even through the thin fabric of my top, I felt the jolt of pleasure it sent straight to my core.
A low, pleased growl rumbled from his chest at the sound I made.
Then he pushed the shirt up, slowly, giving ti to stop him.... but I didn’t. I couldn’t.
My body trembled as his mouth found the soft swell of my breast, lips grazing the sensitive skin before his tongue circled my nipple. I bit my lip, a moan escaping despite . My hands were buried in his hair now, clutching him closer as his mouth worshipped , his other hand still holding my waist like he couldn’t bear to let go.
"Kieran," I breathed, my voice trembling.
He looked up at from where he hovered over my chest, eyes burning like twin moons. "Tell to stop," he said, voice low and rough. "And I will."
But I didn’t say it.
I couldn’t.
Because in that mont, with the fire crackling nearby and his body pressed against mine, I didn’t want him to stop.
Not when I felt like I was finally being touched not out of dominance or cruelty, but out of sothing deeper.
Sothing close to reverence.
Just when I thought he would keep going, when my skin burned under his touch and every nerve scread for more, Kieran suddenly stopped.
He pulled away like he’d been burned.
I blinked in confusion, breathless, my heart pounding in my ears. "What.... what’s wrong?"
His expression had changed completely. The desire in his eyes had dimd, replaced by sothing heavier, darker. He stood up slowly, backing away from the couch. I sat up, pulling my shirt down, disappointnt simring in my chest like embers.
"Kieran?" I whispered, watching his jaw tense.
He ran a hand through his hair, pacing to the other side of the study room. The firelight cast restless shadows on the walls, dancing like ghosts behind him.
"I’m leaving," he said, his voice low.
I froze. The air around stilled.
"What do you an... leaving?" My voice ca out fragile.
He turned to slowly, golden eyes flickering with sothing unspoken. "I’ll be going off-grid for a while. A few days. Maybe more."
Panic gripped my chest. "Why? Where are you going?"
Kieran exhaled deeply, leaning against the couch like thee weight of what he was about to say threatened to crush him.
"I promised my father sothing," he said. "That I’d achieve Total Lycan Ascension before the Blood Moon rises again. One month."
I stared at him, unsure I understood.
He went on, slower now. "It’s a state only the most powerful Lycans have ever achieved. A complete union with the beast inside. No conflict. No duality. You beco one with your wolf. All instincts, all strength, all senses, aligned. You don’t shift anymore, you are the shift."
My blood turned cold.
"I thought it was a myth," I said quietly.
"It’s not." His gaze lifted to mine, intense. "But to begin, I have to undergo sothing called the Moonbinding ditation. It’s... grueling. Painful. I have to separate my soul, look my wolf in the eye, and either rge with it.... or let it consu ."
My throat dried. "That sounds dangerous."
He gave a bitter smile. "It is."
I stood now, moving closer to him. "Then why risk it?"
"Because if I don’t," he said, his voice dropping, "I’ll never be strong enough to be worthy of ever succeeding my father"
The shadows in his eyes deepened.
"But there’s sothing else," he admitted, looking away
I reached out, placing a hand gently on his arm. "What is it?"
He turned to again, but this ti his gaze was hesitant
"If I go through with this... if I rge completely with my wolf... I might not co back the sa. I might lose the part of that still feels human. The part that...." he paused, jaw clenching, "....the part that loves you."
My breath caught.
He looked down, voice raw now. "I might beco sothing monstrous. A power-hungry beast with no conscience. And if that happens.... Lorraine, I could hurt you. I don’t want that"
I reached up, grabbing his face in both my hands, forcing him to look at . "Then don’t shut out. Don’t walk into the dark alone, Kieran. Wherever you are going to, take with you, let be your anchor your human side"
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