It’s early in the morning, an hour before the accident usually takes place. We all stand under our umbrellas at the intersection where it goes down.
Haruaki and I have been assigned to the task of helping Maria in the end. Both of us asked for this part, though it’ll undoubtedly be dangerous if the wreck actually takes place.
Maria will find the truck that caused the accident and hijack it.
Having her behind the wheel gives her the lowest chance of getting hit by it, Maria claid.
I’m nervous. There’s no margin for failure. I couldn’t sleep a wink last night. I was so anxious I spent several hours on the phone with Maria reviewing the plan.
I look at Haruaki next to .
Unlike , he doesn’t seem tense at all. The look on his face is the sa as ever. It’s the expression Haruaki has always had during the entirety of our stay in the Rejecting Classroom.
This ti, we may be able to destroy the classroom,regardless of whether or not the accident takes place.
“Hey, Haruaki. There’s sothing I want to talk to you about while we wait. Is that cool?”
“What’re you even asking for? Of course it’s okay!”
The sound of the raindrops hitting my umbrella causes to look up at the stormy sky.
“It’s about Mogi.”
“About Kasumi? You an the original and not the Otonashi version here with us now?”
I nod.
“I don’t think I told you about how Mogi killed .”
Haruaki frowns. “Damn. Must’ve been harsh.”
The reason I didn’t tell him wasn’t that I was trying to hide it. I simply wasn’t able to rember the events until after we figured out Mogi was the owner. Rembering who the owner was seed to have unlocked all my other mories of the previous ti.
“Mogi killed , Maria, Kokone, and most likely you, too.”
“…She killed ? Kasumi did? Why? What would she do that for?”
“She was kicking you all out. The Rejecting Classroom is a world where everything gets reset to its original state like it never even happened. If soone gets killed, that will be reset, too. But it seems Mogi has the ability to ‘reject’ people from the classroom if she kills them herself. My theory is that she does it when she truly doesn’t want to see soone anymore.”
Haruaki nods, his expression grave. I’ve explained the nature of rejection to him before, how it removes any ans of rembering that person.
“I can’t believe Kasumi did all that… But, well, I guess that’s what happens to a person after experiencing almost thirty thousand loops in this place. It’s not impossible that’d be the result.”
“Do you really think so?” I ask.
“Yeah. It might be hard to imagine, but anyone would lose their mind if they were stuck in the sa place for so long.”
“Yeah, I can see that. But just because you lose your mind doesn’t an you start killing people. It isn’t the kind of idea that normally pops into people’s heads.”
“Really? Maybe that’s just your own values influencing how you see things.”
He may be right, but I still don’t buy it. Those murders only beca an effective ans of rejection because of her guilt. I can’t believe Mogi would be able to co up with the idea of performing such atrocious acts on her own.
“…You opened your heart to Maria three thousand tis and got hit by the truck several hundred of those, right?”
“So I hear. I have no way of knowing for sure, though.”
“Right. But all of those actions ended up hurting Maria in the end, correct?”
Haruaki smiles bitterly as he speaks.
“Yeah, but that wasn’t my intention.”
“So why do you think Maria suffered so much? Because so much repetition lends power to words and ideas, even if they’re completely ridiculous and untrue. Let’s say you think you’re a handso guy. Your confidence is going to take a big hit if you’re told you’re ugly ten thousand tis, even if the people were joking.”
“Sure.”
“It’s the sa with Maria. After you professed your love to her three thousand tis, she couldn’t help but acknowledge your existence. This is Maria we’re talking about here. Even she must have felt sothing when you said she was your enemy.”
“As long as Kazuki Hoshino is your enemy, then you’ve made an enemy of as well. And I can never die.”
I can’t help rembering those words again.
“…Huh? Are you saying I finally flipped her switch?”
I laugh off Haruaki’s joke.
“So what if soone suggested murdering people to Mogi a thousand tis? She was on the brink of insanity and didn’t have anyone else to rely on, so she might have actually been so desperate that it began to sound like a good idea.”
Haruaki agrees.
“That would definitely be a rough spot to be in. It could be possible. The person suggesting murder would be a part of the stagnant world, so their actions and beliefs would never change. They’d probably even repeat themselves verbatim. If they said it even once, they could’ve said it a thousand tis.”
“That’s true, but that wouldn’t make it a problem so much as sothing like the accident. What I an is…”
I finally shift my gaze away from the rainy weather.
“What if soone was intentionally doing and saying things to put her on that course?”
I fix Haruaki with a hard look.
My sudden scrutiny doesn’t seem to bother him in the slightest.
“Huh? But that shouldn’t be possible, right?”
The look on his face is still the sa as ever.
“That’s not true. Maria and I could have done it if we tried. You see what I’m saying?It would be possible if soone persuaded Mogi while pretending to have lost their mories.”
Haruaki quietly listens to my idea without offering any argunt.
“I always thought that being able to rember gave us an unconditional advantage. You’d think that the more information you have, the better, right? That’s not necessarily true, however. Retaining our mories can actually leave us open to repeated attacks from people who don’t rember anything, or people who are acting like they don’t. anwhile, the people who don’t keep a grip on their mories are safe. From there, they can launch assaults on those of us at the front lines.”
I experienced sothing like this when the person I loved told to “wait until tomorrow,” even though she wasn’t in the mory-free safe zone.
“Suppose there was soone who was committing this type of ntal warfare on Mogi from a safe position. They’d be well aware she was suffering, observing her to make sure she didn’t secure so ans of escape and preparing an answer for her in the form of murder. If that were the case…”
“If that were the case, then you could argue that person manipulated Mogi and was an accomplice to the murders in an abstract sense.”
Haruaki speaks in an off-hand manner.
I don’t dispute his line of thinking.
“Mogi might not be the only target of these attacks.”
“Which ans?”
“Mogi wasn’t the only one at the forefront of all this. Maria and I were there, too. It all depends on what their end purpose was, but it’s possible they also tried to manipulate Maria and . Maybe they’ve already influenced us a bit.”
“You want to try killing ?”
I rember these words soone said to before.
I didn’t hear them only once; I’m sure of it. I heard them multiple tis, until they clung to my mind like a curse.
That isn’t all. I was also shown dead bodies.
Maria received confessions of love, beca a casualty herself in place of others, and was viewed with hostility.
My mories aren’t complete, but I can at least recall that much. There are probably even more detailed traps I never noticed.
We’re under constant attack by soone in a safe, risk-free position. If things don’t go as that person wishes, they can keep trying over and over until they get the results they want.
“If we’ve been moving according to that person’s designs even slightly, then that could an…”
I swallow hard.
“…what we’re doing now could all be part of their plans.”
Haruaki has gone quiet. His umbrella hides his face from .
The silence grows, but the rain seems oddly loud. I hear a small voice.
At first, I wonder what he’s saying, but when I listen closely, I realize it’s stifled laughter.
Haruaki moves aside his umbrella to show his face.
His eyes are full of loathing for , the corners of his mouth twisted upward in a smile.
“C’mon, Hosshi. What’s up with that joke—sorry, ‘epic theory’—of yours? None of that’s even possible. People don’t behave as expected. You know that, right? You definitely had so interesting ideas there, but you were so serious about it all I honestly didn’t know whether to laugh. But that thought was kinda funny by itself, so I laughed anyway.”
“Yeah, I guess it was a bit long-winded and hard to understand.”
“…Long-winded? No, it’s more about how you don’t have the slightest clue what this mystery attacker is even trying to accomplish. No matter what their goal is, there has to be an easier way of doing things.”
Haruaki still sounds so cheerful.
“Yeah, I don’t know what motivates them. That’s why I was going to ask you.”
“…?”
There’s no turning back if I continue.
“Haruaki…”
But I have no intention of doing that.
“Why have you forced us down this path?”
No response.
Haruaki’s face is hidden behind his umbrella again.
He doesn’t say anything. He probably doesn’t feel like it.
“I forget exactly how, but you and I beca friends not long after I ca to this school, and then you also introduced to Kokone and Daiya. If it weren’t for you, my school life would’ve been a little less interesting. I owe so much to you.”
I have no choice but to keep talking.
“We haven’t even been friends for a year yet.”
“So you’re saying that’s why none of this is strange?”
I shake my head. Not that Haruaki can see it.
“There are a lot of things I don’t know, but there are also plenty of things I do. And there’s one thing I can say for certain.”
It’s ti to lay it all out.
“Haruaki Usui would never be able to drive us all to the brink like this.”
I can see his face again.
He’s looking at , his eyes open wide.
“So…”
Finally, I say it.
“So…who are you?”
“You’re being evasive! I don’t buy it! Wait, don’t tell you’re serious?! You lucky bastard! Kasumi’s even cuter than usual these days, too!”
Haruaki said it so casually not long ago.
That’s when I first noticed sothing was wrong.
The Rejecting Classroom has certain rules. No one around Mogi will notice any changes she undergoes. They won’t even notice if Aya Otonashi takes her place. That’s what forced to ask why.
Why was Haruaki able to say that Mogi lookedeven cuter than usual?
That’s not the only thing.
Haruaki was rejected.
Even I forgot about him. But sohow,I was able to rember later.
I chalked it up to the fact that he was my best friend. Still, why could I rember only him and none of the other people who had been rejected?
It was just a theory, but what if I didn’t forget Haruaki completely becausesoone else was inhabiting his body?
The theory’s full of holes and nowhere near strong enough to be decisive proof, but none of that matters anymore.
I’ve rembered.
I’ve dredged up a mory that was never ant to return.
“Do you have a wish?”
“This Box can grant any wish, no matter what it may be.”
Those were the words of that figure that looked like anyone and no one.
“Tell what you want.”
I prepare to say the na, the na that I forgot for so long. The na of the being that gives away the Boxes.
And that na is…
“O.”
The mont the word leaves my lips, Haruaki vanishes from his own face.
“Heh-heh.”
His features don’t transform; it’s just that there’s no trace of him left in that grinning visage. It’s like an imposter draped in Haruaki’s skin.
At last, the phantom we’ve all been pursuing for so long has been revealed.
O.
“Dammit. No one but the actual owner of the Box is supposed to know that na. That’s odd.”
“You got a bit careless with those slips of the tongue back there.”
“Careless?”
O snickers as if what I said is truly hilarious.
“Not a single thing I’ve done has been careless. You’re the strange one, for being able to find with so little to go on.”
“Am I?”
“Then are you saying that whenever soone isn’t behaving as they should be, you assu they’re possessed or soone else entirely?”
That definitely isn’t true. No matter how strangely soone is acting, the idea that they’re soone else is far too outlandish and implausible.
“Either way, you’ve found . That ans you know about my existence as the motivating force behind everything going on here. No one is supposed to be able to rember .”
“If so, then why do I rember?”
“Why indeed? It’s truly a mystery to . Perhaps the presence of Aya Otonashi has sothing to do with it. Either way, my existence is such that you can’t simply learn about it from others,” O blithely informs , not realizing that I couldn’t care less. “…Oh, that’s right—you asked what I wanted. I’ll tell you. It’s not like I’m trying to hide it.All I wanted was to observe you up close.”
Those words trigger a certain sensation within .
Yeah, there it is again.
The sa strange discomfort I felt the first ti I t O returns.
What is it? What is this emotion?
“…I’m afraid I don’t understand. What would make you drive Mogi to do such things?”
“What motivated to manipulate the owner? I told you that all this happened because I wanted to observe you, but maybe I need to break things down into simpler terms.”
O begins speaking with great relish.
“I wanted to see how you would react to another person’s Box. When I granted Kasumi Mogi’s wish to redo the past, I was unexpectedly pleased for a mont. After all, it was an opportunity for to see you exposed to the effects of a Box for an extended period of ti. However, I soon realized my joy was misplaced, the reason being that I naturally wanted to observe as wide a variety of situations as possible. Unfortunately, this Box you all call the Rejecting Classroom is incapable of producing other patterns. Everyone followed the sa path of behavior, and you were no exception. It didn’t matter that Kasumi Mogi and Aya Otonashi were able to retain their mories. As long as you, the crucial elent, couldn’t hold on to yours, none of this would be of any interest to at all.”
My discomfort has grown to the point that I wrap my arms around myself to keep it at bay.
“So I decided to take a more hands-on approach. I subbed myself in for Haruaki Usui, who was in a perfect position to influence the three of you. Using Haruaki Usui, Aya Otonashi, and Kasumi Mogi, I could make you keep ahold of your mories and set the stage to my liking. The payoff for my efforts was the chance to watch you in fine form.”
“Which ans you’re the one who set things up so Mogi would kill ?”
“Yes, because I wanted to see how you would react on the verge of being murdered by the one you love.”
Mogi suffered for so, so long, just for that?
“I should also point out that you only harbored that love for Kasumi Mogi because I induced it in you.”
“Wha—?”
My love was contrived…?
“Ohhh? And here I was certain you’d be well aware of that by now. But now I see it must have escaped your notice. Heh-heh… It’s monts like these that make being up close and personal worth it. Truthfully, I could watch you just as easily from outside of the Box, but if I weren’t in here with you, I’d most likely miss out on these amazing little reactions. Observing sothing from outside the Box makes it seem so distant. It’s troubleso, like peering down from space at sothing on Earth using a high-powered telephoto lens. I can definitely see everything, but it’s not easy to focus on minute details. Perhaps it was a fortuitous side effect, but I’ve found observing you firsthand as Haruaki Usui to be truly enjoyable.”
I’ve finally identified the horrible feeling I’ve borne for so long.
Fear.
I’ve experienced it before, of course, but this is a terror of an entirely different form, to the point that I can’t even grasp it.
“So, Kazuki Hoshino, what are you going to do now?”
I can’t form words.
Now that I’m aware of own fear, my mouth is sealed shut.
“Did you really think uncovering my presence within Haruaki Usui would solve everything? If I were human and a murderer, all you would need to do is hand over to the police. That in itself would be one kind of resolution. But that isn’t going to work here, is it? Your goal is to restore things to normal. Just speaking with like this isn’t going to solve anything.”
I’m in danger. Encountering O has beco the greatest threat of them all.
“Therein lies the reason I didn’t hide my identity as Haruaki Usui any more than I needed to. Yes, I took possession of the Box from its owner, Kasumi Mogi. I can even present it to you here. But that won’t be necessary. I don’t have to give you the Box simply because you recalled that I exist. And you certainly don’t have the ability to force to do so, either.”
O is interested in . But it’s the sort of attention reserved for the subject of an experint, nothing more, nothing less. I have no idea how to deal with soone who treats this way.
So…
“Yup, you’re right about that.”
Of course, I’m not the one who could pull off such an irreverent retort.
“He doesn’t have the ability on his own.”
O looks at as if searching for the source of the voice. He’s right to do so, since it’s inside my bag.
A truck’s horn blares. Soon after cos the roar of an engine, and before long, we can see the large vehicle approaching. O watches it with the slightest bit of consternation. It’s the sa semitruck we’re sick of seeing, and now it’s barreling toward us.
Maria sits in the driver’s seat.
“I was hoping I’d get to et you, O.”
She’s speaking from the cell phone that’s been turned on inside my schoolbag this whole ti.
The truck approaches, yet neither of us moves. I hear the screech of the ergency brake. The rain is making it difficult to slow down, as expected. The semi is still bearing down on us. Still, O never takes even a single step back. Watching him, I can’t move, either, nor can I stop myself from closing my eyes.
The sound of the brake fades.
I open my eyes again to see the truck right before them in the most literal sense.
O lets slip a faint smile and turns toward the driver’s seat.
“And just what was the point of that silly display?”
“Just my way of welcoming you to the party. How fortunate you didn’t get run over like Mogi.”
I can hear Maria’s voice coming from both my bag and in front of .
She steps down from the truck, removing her headset and ending the phone call.
Maria stands before us, with no concern for the rain, and fixes her gaze upon O.
“So you were listening in on our conversation the whole ti. I guess that ans you were never interested in my strategy to begin with. Too bad. I had hoped to see Kazuki Hoshino’s disappointnt in its outco.”
“I was listening carefully when you detailed your plan, but Kazuki was the one who figured out who you really were and kept you busy.”
It wasn’t my intent to do that. I just didn’t know when to tell her what I had figured out.
I did choose the timing for when I would get Haruaki’s cooperation and have this conversation, however.
“It worked out perfectly, thanks to him. If I had been here, you might have continued to play innocent.”
“So you went to the trouble of stealing the truck to make sure I knew you wouldn’t be nearby. I applaud your hard work. Still, I can’t help but wonder why you think I would try to maintain my cover if you were here. You may be a Box, but don’t think that ans you can actually do sothing about this situation.”
“Oh, you didn’t know? All my efforts must have gone to waste. Let ask you this: Are you familiar with my Misbegotten Happiness?”
“Yes, of course I am. I also know that it could never have even the slightest effect on .”
“Heh-heh, your inhuman nature keeps you from truly understanding us, I see. Maybe this will help. I am prepared to do whatever it takes to get rid of you.”
O’s expression becos a thin smile. “All you can do is trap other people in your Box. What makes you think you could ever do anything to ?”
“You still haven’t figured out why I chose Kazuki, have you?”
Hearing my na brings back into focus. O regards with a gaze that is probably ant to be gentle but is actually bloodcurdling. It’s like how you size up a piece of pork when you’re considering how to cook it.
“…I see.”
O smiles.
Maria levels an angry glare at O as she continues.
“Looks like you get it now. Kazuki has the ability to use Boxes. He may even be able to make use of my Box, Misbegotten Happiness. If he did, I’m sure he would wish for normal life to carry on. He would wish for it to happenfree from things that disrupt it, like the Boxes and you.”
This is the part where O should be fighting back. Instead, the being’s eyes rely lower sadly, without a trace of being overwheld, surprised, or even frustrated.
“I guess you never change, do you?”
Those are O’s only words for Maria, despite the fact that she has prevailed after 27,755 loops in the Rejecting Classroom.
“Don’t you know that if you get rid of , you, as an inferior Box, will also disappear?”
Maria remains unfazed by O’s words.
“I’ve known that all along.”
“I’m sure you have.” O still looks sad and seems perfectly unconcerned about the looming prospect of disappearing forever. “You still can’t live for yourself, can you? You’re only capable of acting on behalf of others. It must be such a miserable existence. I pity you. I truly do.”
“Your pity isn’t worth fish food.”
“At first I found those rare aspects of your existence intriguing, but now I couldn’t care less. A human without desires is nothing more than a machine, about as fit a subject for observation as a vacuum cleaner. Nothing could possibly bore more.”
Maria clenches her jaw in anger at O’s remarks. I can understand why. She’s declared this thing her enemy, yet all O has for her is dismissal and even sympathy.
“Fine,” O says. “I don’t particularly relish the idea of vanishing, either. Let’s make a deal. I’ll hand over the Box, and in return, you let go. Does that sound fair?”
“…Hmph. Even in the face of annihilation, your bargaining point is still so selfish.”
“You should be thankful I’m playing along with your little threat, though you have such a poor chance of actually seeing it through. There’s no guarantee Kazuki Hoshino will use your Box as you intend, and even if he does, it’s unlikely I’ll disappear as you claim. I’m rely making this unnecessary concession as a token of respect for Kazuki deducing my presence.”
“You’re one to talk about concessions. All you’re giving Kazuki is the dilapidated cage you’ve had him trapped in this entire ti. You can make new enclosures whenever you want. I’m sure you were probably almost through with him anyway, about to toss him aside and replace him with your next toy.”
“I’ll leave that up to your imagination.”
“Hmph… Kazuki, are you fine with this?”
Maria asks for confirmation. I nod. I’m fine with anything as long as it does away with the Rejecting Classroom.
“Kazuki Hoshino, may I offer you a piece of advice?”
O is speaking to .
“You are a human who doesn’t wish for change. However, most owners find they do desire change once they obtain a Box. They want sothing. They want to beco sothing. They want to get rid of sothing. They try to make these longings into reality. That ans you’ll inevitably co into conflict with your own nature as an owner.”
I’m unsure of the intent behind the revelation, and my face tightens.
O observes with great interest.
“Kazuki Hoshino, do you think of yourself as different?”
Why ask that?
“…I think I’m normal.”
“I see. Well, I’m afraid I have to tell you that you are not. But don’t trouble your head if you find that unpleasant. The window of ti when people can afford to be unique isn’t that long. Such people are inevitably either cast by the wayside or hamred in the mold of society until they are no longer special. So relax. I’m sure you fall into the latter category.”
O’s smile remains in place the whole ti.
“That’s why you really are so unfortunate.”
The words seem to bring this entity such pleasure.
“You’ve learned about the existence of these little ways of breaking the rules, after all. Now, whenever you encounter a situation that fills you with regret, you’ll think, ‘If only I had a Box…’ No matter how much you shake your head and try to forget they exist, sadly for you, they always will. Boxes capable of granting any wish will always be there, and you’ll never forget about the loopholes they offer. Furthermore, as you live with this knowledge in your mind, there will inevitably co a ti when you realize you need one.”
O’s expression never changes.
Yeah, I rember now…
I refused to take a Box. Not even that was enough, though. I was already bound by O’s curse.
“You might not be different anymore when the ti arrives that you need a Box. If so, you won’t be able to use it, and the prospect of that dampens my spirits a bit. That’s why from here on out, I’m going to interfere with you and those around you, just the slightest bit, so that you take a greater interest in using a Box.”
What could I have done differently to avoid this burden?
In all likelihood, nothing.
I— No, all of us—were dood from the mont we t O.
“Never fear, though. Even if you do cease to be unique, I will still provide you with a Box, should you need one. That’s enough for . All you would need to do then is let hear your sound.”
“…My sound?”
“Yes. I love the noises humans make above all others, but there is one particular tone that I find especially delightful. That’s the sound I hope you would share with . Hmm? And what is it, you ask? My tastes are pretty simple, so I’m sure you can probably guess, but I’ll tell you anyway…”
O grins.
“It’s the screeching of the human heart.”
And with that said, the O resembling Haruaki Usui vanishes. A small box lies on the ground instead. Things begin changing of their own accord as soon as I reach for it.
The scenery around us imdiately begins folding up with a loudslam, slam. I can see the walls of the world. The white wallpaper covering them splits and sprinkles to the floor as dust. The sickly sweetness clinging to my skin vanishes in favor of an oppressive dampness that I can only describe as unpleasant. My inner ears are thrown into disarray, and my head swims. It sounds like sothing breaking. Sothing cracking. Sothing shattering. Soone shattering. This is despair. Undeniable despair.
The false scenery now gone, we find ourselves in a dark chamber. It’s so cramped and claustrophobic that even half a day here would be enough to drive soone mad.
This is probably the inside of the Box.
In this cell-like room sits a girl grasping her knees tight, her face buried in them.
It’s the girl I loved.
“…Mogi.”
She slowly raises her head at my words.
“Oh…”
Those eyes that were once so lifeless now harbor a faint light.
“I can’t believe this is happening. This is all too good to be true.”
Tears run down her cheeks.
Sothing about this seems odd to , and I soon realize why.
“…You really did co to save .”
So that’s it.
She’s finally learned to cry again.
“Mogi, I’m sorry, but I need to destroy the Rejecting Classroom.”
“…I know.” She nods tearfully.
“And I’m going to let that truck kill you.”
“……I know.” She wipes at her eyes. “I don’t care if you destroy the Box. I don’t care if you end my life. Just give a mont. There’s sothing I have to tell you.”
Mogi searches inside her bag. She pulls sothing out but quickly moves her hand behind her back so I can’t see.
Maria’s eyes narrow.
“Mogi, don’t tell you still…”
Without a word of response to Maria, Mogi walks toward , her hand still behind her back.
“Mogi, stop! It’s too late for…”
“It’s okay, Maria,” I admonish her. I still can’t see what Mogi is hiding, but I have a pretty good idea of what it might be.
Shooting a questioning look, Maria steps around behind Mogi. Seeing what’s in Mogi’s hand, Maria gives an exhausted smile.
“Kazu, do you believe that so feelings never change?”
That’s Mogi’s question for .
I know the answer right away, but it’s not a kind one for her.
I can’t bring myself to say it.
Maybe my reply would have been different had I not experienced the things I did within the Rejecting Classroom. But I have. I’ve experienced a world that lasted for almost an eternity. That’s why I believe what I do about unchanging feelings…
“No, I don’t.”
Mogi listens carefully to my answer.
And then she smiles.
“You’re right. I don’t, either.”
I suddenly look into her eyes. She seems to have expected this reaction, because she keeps smiling as she continues speaking.
“I thought my feelings for you would never change, but that wasn’t true at all. My love ran out. I began to dislike you, to hate you and think you were a nuisance. I even tried to kill you. I realize now, though, that I depended on you. I clung to you for so, so long in the hope that you would release from this place. I couldn’t ignore you. I’m aware of how despicably selfish my feelings were. I had no other choice but to think of myself, though. I know what to call that emotion. I didn’t believe feelings could never change, but I did believe in one single thing, for the entire ti I was trapped inside the Rejecting Classroom.”
Mogi gives a weak, faltering embrace.
She presses the object she was hiding into my hand.
I can feel her lips trembling next to my ear.
“I loved you, Kazu.”
Mogi’s lips draw near mine but, just before they touch, stop.
Her lips remain there for mont before slowly drawing away, having never reached mine.
I almost ask her why she didn’t do anything, but I decide against it.
I look down at what she gave .
“Ah…”
There’s the reason.
Having realized this, I bite my lip.
I was expecting sothing entirely different.
In my hand is an Umaibo.
Everything up to that point went as I thought it would. But this isn’t my beloved corn potage flavor. This is teriyaki burger, the flavor I’m not particularly fond of. It’s the one Mogi was originally supposed to give .
Why was her embrace so timid? Why didn’t she actually kiss ?
I know why. This isn’t a profession of love from the Kasumi Mogi of the Rejecting Classroom, the girl who opened her heart to and even kissed so many tis before.
This Mogi could never refer to by anything other than my last na.
This is the first ti she told how she felt, before she entered the Rejecting Classroom.
I want to do March 2 over again.
Mogi has just reenacted my greatest regret from that day, the one thing I wanted to redo.
Am I supposed to give the sa reply I did on the real March 2…?
I look at Mogi.
She’s smiling gently, waiting for the response she knows so well.
“I…”
I can’t.
I don’t want to say those words.
I actually loved Mogi, after all. O may have manipulated to have them, but the feelings themselves were not false.
Why am I only allowed to say things that bring pain to Mogi?
The answer is plain to see.
I’ve rejected this Box. I’ve rejected Mogi’s wish. I’m going to make her into a body lying on the road. I have no right to say anything kind to her.
My mouth opens.
It’s still difficult to summon the answer. As I stand there with my mouth opening and closing, wavering in indecision, I’m startled at the taste of a salty liquid running into my mouth.
These are the only words left to :
“Wait until tomorrow.”
Mogi lowers her eyes sadly.
I have no reason to expect her not to be hurt. But her expression soon changes.
“Thank you.”
She says that with a smile.
Truly, one from the bottom of her heart.
Yeah, I rember that smile at last.
I saw it once during a conversation with her.
The one where I realized I was in love with her—where this love I’m about to lose first blossod.
It’s a precious mory.
“Hoshino, will you call Kasumi?”
“Uh, wh-why do you ask that all of a sudden?”
“It may seem out of the blue to you, but I’ve wanted to ask you that for a long ti.”
“Oh…I see.”
“So…will you do it?”
“S-sure…”
“A-and, oh, by the way…c-can I call you Kazu?”
“Um…sure. I don’t mind.”
“Okay, try saying it.”
“…Kasumi.”
“…One more ti.”
“Kasumi.”
“…Thank you.”
“Ah…! Wh-why’re you crying…?!”
“Oh, am I?”
“Y-yeah, you are…”
“Well…it must be because I’m so happy, Kazu.”
And thenKasumi smiled, her eyes still full of tears.
I had never seen a smile like that before, a smile so genuinely full of happiness.
It was the first ti I ever made soone elated. The experience was so new, and it made unbelievably happy as well.
Bringing joy to others is joy itself.
I was delighted to learn this about myself, and the girl who taught this beca very special to .
I might be the simplest person out there, but there’s no denying that one smile changed my entire existence.
But now I’m getting ready to erase that mory.
I’m going to obliterate this new emotion.
It’s too horrible. Why does sothing like this have to await at the very end? Asking to destroy it with my own hands is too cruel.
Regardless, I’ve already chosen this path.
I set myself on it long, long ago.
The Rejecting Classroom can do away with all of this insanity in an instant, right?
“Maria, can I ask you for a favor?”
I’m hovering on the brink, and I need only a little push.
“Go for it.”
“You must know what I’m about to do.”
“Naturally. I’ve watched you more than anyone else in the world has.”
“So what am I going to do? I want you to tell .”
Maria nods, her expression grave. I’m certain she understands why I’m asking this of her.
“You’re going to destroy it.”
Even at a ti like this, Maria can’t phrase things gently.
“You’re going to destroy soone else’s ill-chosen wish for your own sake. You will never, ever back down from this.”
She’s right. I believe this is the correct choice.
“That’s why you’re going to destroy the Box.”
I nod at Maria’s assertion.
I wipe away my tears using my entire left arm.
“That’s exactly right.”
I stand before one of the walls.
The ashen sides enclosing us are thin, as if made of paper. There’s no more power left in this Box. It’s just preserving my mories, keeping them from escaping for a bit longer.
I want to turn around and get one last look at Kasumi, but I have the feeling that’s sothing I absolutely must not do.
I raise my left hand.
Then, to demolish this Box, Kasumi’s wish, and my mories, I raise my right.
“Thank you. I knew you would be the one to free from this place in the end, Kazu.”
Stop it.
She shouldn’t be grateful. I’m only tearing down this place, stomping her mistaken wish into oblivion.
I’m sorry.
Please forgive for not being able to save you.
I ignore her words, but I’m thankful for them all the sa.
That final smile gives the faith in myself I need to do this.
“Aaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!”
Roaring as loud as I can, I hit the wall with all my might.
A terrific noise resounds through the wall, and it shatters like glass.
I can see Kasumi amid the shards raining down. We smile at each other happily.
The pieces fall, break, and turn to dust.
A white light shines in from outside the walls. Each ti another section falls, the light devours the gloom. It washes over everything until I can see nothing apart from us.
Eventually, it’s too bright to see at all.
Or so I thought. For so cruel reason, I can see Kasumi clearly, as she once was before all of this.
She’s lying in the middle of the road, covered in blood. Her pain and suffering are so apparent that it’s all I can do to keep from looking away. But she’s smiling. She’s trying with all her might to smile for .
I open my mouth to speak.
“Good-bye.”
The pure white light then claims us, and we vanish.
The radiance courses through , violently searches out every last bit of my body, finding its way inside and consuming . My organs, my blood, my heart, and my brain turn white. The light even finds its way into my mories, bleaching them as well. My mories that are false yet so precious at the sa ti, my new feelings, the words we just exchanged—it all fades.
All fades to white.
All fades to white.
All fades to white…
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