Chapter 15: Sendai-san is very familiar with it — 15
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
If I had to choose between regretting it or not regretting it, I would choose I to do so. To that extent, I think about the day I last saw Sendai-san.
That day, Sendai-san was unusually angry.
I had seen her look disgruntled and grumpy about my orders, but never so overtly angry.
But that was the result I wanted.
But I have so regrets.
I shouldn’t have done that.
I thought so several tis.
I had to.
I have tried to think so several tis.
Perhaps it’s because I don’t have many plans to get excited about just because it’s spring break, but I feel depressed because all the things I normally don’t think about are on my mind.
It was the first I had ever done that to soone.
I have never once covered anyone with popcorn and cider. I’ve never even thought about it.
When I’m in a room, all I can think about is how depressing it is. I bought a manga for 5,000 yen, which I normally have paid for Sendai-san, hoping to have a bit of fun, but I never got anywhere with it. Neither the images nor the words entered my mind, and I just flipped through the pages, which have now beco a re ornant.
I lie on my bed and hold my hand up to the soft sunlight coming in through the window.
The day Sendai-san told to cut the cabbage, the wound I made with the knife was healed. It hurt when I cut myself, and it hurt even more when Sendai-san bit , so I’m glad it’s healed.
I am just wondering what Sendai-san thought of when she licked my blood.
She seems to able to live without taking orders from soone, yet she is in this room listening to my orders.
Her behavior is so far removed from the image she had at school.
I thought she was going to bring a cute band-aid, but instead she brought an adorable band-aid that specialized in function. Unlike in school where smiles are pasted on like plaster casts of affection, it was sloppy, uncaring, and selfishly using it in my room.
The distance is strange too.
She is friendly and approach people without regard for their convenience.
She enter my daily life as if it were a matter of course.
That’s why I feel out of sorts.
「We’re like friends you know?」
Sendai-san exhales loudly on the bed where she usually lies down. She reaches over and takes one of the manga from the pile on the floor.
「It’s the second volu.」
I haven’t read the first volu yet.
I picked up the five books above the pile and looked for the first volu. But none of them were the first volu. I throw out the manga and picked up my phone.
「Maika, what are you doing?」
She said she would be attending a cram school during spring break, so she may be still there. When I t her before yesterday, she was on her way ho from cram school. Even though I know, if I were to do sothing with soone, she would be the first person I would contact, and I would send her a ssage with just one word: 「Free.」
Sure enough, no reply.
Then I look at my phone to contact soone else. As I looked at the nas of my friends from the top of the chat application, looking for soone who might be willing to help pass the ti, I saw Sendai-san’s na.
I can’t contact her up right now because it’s spring break.
The only ti we see each other is on school days, and we have a rule that we don’t see each other on our days off. But we have not promised not to contact each other. That’s why, maybe sending a ssage or two would not break the rule, but there’s no ssage I wanted to send at Sendai-san.
I have nothing in common with her, and I have no words to speak to her.
The reason Sendai-san cos into this house is money.
Without 5,000 yen, our relationship would not be possible. But Sendai-san is not in need of money, so if she gets tired of this relationship, it’s over.
From the beginning, there was no ti limit on the promise. It is so lax that it may last a long ti but may end with a short promise, and no wonder it ended as capriciously as it began.
I look at my unblemished fingers.
Just as a knife cut wound disappears and vanishes, one day the relationship with Sendai-san will disappear. It may be tomorrow, or it may be a year from now, but it will never end.
When I was a child, my mother also disappeared one day.
Even mothers can easily abandon their children behind and leave. It would not be surprising if Sendai-san, a stranger, stopped into this room when she beca a third year and her environnt changed.
So, I covered her in popcorn and poured cider on her, which made Sendai-san angry.
I’m sick of waiting for soone who never cos. If there’s a good reason why she co when I call her, I won’t be frightened of the day when the promise disappears. Assuming that Sendai-san does not want to co such a place, it would be a good reason not to call her.
In any case, such a reason that I might be able to convince myself should have reassured .
But instead of feeling relieved, I am actually the one who wishes I hadn’t. Sendai-san spents far too much ti in this room, and I would love to see her here again.
It was supposed to be just a way to pass the ti.
It was supposed to be a little distraction.
If I sit on the floor, I rember eating chocolate here, or having my howork done here, or if I am on the bed, I rember lying here reading manga or lounging around here, and I can think about is her.
This is all Sendai-san’s fault.
I stroked the fingers where the scars had disappeared.
I lick the finger, but it does not taste of blood.
I plop down and sit down next to a stack of manga.
I took one random and flipped through the pages, and received a reply from Maika,「This is a cram school.」
『When you’re done, do you want to go to a movie?』
『Tomorrow’s alright?』
『Sure.』
I’m at ho and I’m depressed.
If I go outside, I can get rid of the distraction, I enjoy being with Maika.
I hope we are still in the sa class in third year.
She even said that Sendai-san was——
For example, if we are in the sa class, I can call her up as usual. If we are in different classes, I can only call her once.
If she decided to do it that way, I might feel a little bit better.
I don’t know if Sendai-san will co here when I call her, though.
My heart is churning in my chest.
But, I can’t help it.
『What do you want to do about the etup place?』
A ssage arrives from Maika.
I typed in the sa place as the day before yesterday and sent it.
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