Two days passed by...
In the early morning...
It’s almost five in the morning but Brina is still wide awake.
She is quietly sitting on the bed looking through the floor to ceiling walls with her lifeless eyes.
Though she tried to sleep, she just couldn’t.
Who could bla her? She got so accustod to Louis’s warmth and scent that without him she is feeling as if she is incomplete.
Without his body hugging her, she could sleep no more. And, once in the past, she had suffered severe insomnia which troubled her a lot.
However, after Louis ca into her life, that has disappeared magically. But now, with him no longer by her side, it seems like her insomnia has increased by two folds.
It’s been totally three nights and she hadn’t even slept three hours a day properly.
Falling asleep was one huge step while after falling asleep, having a peaceful sleep is another huge step.
However, whenever she tried to sleep, she will face with a nightmares all the consecutive nights, making her wake up startled and drenching in sweat.
And now, she is all alone here.. no one is by her side to comfort her. She felt like she had travelled back into the past when her parents died.
She is feeling that low, scared and helpless now.
Even today, she woke up at four in the morning. She hadn’t even slept for three to four hours properly. Even when she was asleep, she could not prevent her traumatic thoughts.
Jerking from sleep suddenly in the middle of the night, shivering, crying and feeling as if there is soone in the room..
She has faced all of those when she lost her family and now she is going through the sa situation again after finding out that Louis is the future King and their relationship could no longer be practically possible.
And, here she is trying to stay as low key as possible but, at what situation happened with Louis is now putting her through could do the exact opposite for her.
Becoming a Queen or participating in those competitions only ans you are becoming a public figure.
You would be pulled into the light and your history will be dug by the paparazzi and gonna published in their magazines.
"I guess, my life is like this, brother. You and our parents were already taken away from and my nephew was made lifeless, stabbing my heart whenever I see him like that. Though he is here right in front of my eyes, that’s nothing but a pure torture for ."
"However, after years of this torture and loneliness, my mind was able to accept my misery and move on.. but." Brina cried, talking to her brother’s tomb as she kneeled in front of it.
As she could not sleep, she went to the garden where her parents, brother and sister-in-law’s morials are built.
She could no longer contain her emotions that she burst out crying. At least this garden gave her the feeling that she is with her parents and brother.
"Why? Why is this happening to myself, brother? Why didn’t I and Will die with you guys? You people left us alone. Now look at us, he is fighting with his life and I am having my second heartbreak. Could God be any more cruel to ?"
"Firstly, he made love Nickolas and my love has beco the reason for your death. Now, the only family I had is Will and I decided to dedicate my life to protect him, but God sent Louis into my life." Brina sarcastically laughed.
"And, now he could beco the unintended reason for Will’s death. World is too small, isn’t it, brother? Plunging into the world of which I am escaping." Brina said, wiping away her tears.
"I was put in a position where I had to choose between Will’s life or my happiness with Louis. I was not given the chance of luxury for having both at the sa ti. But in return, God has made it much more difficult for to take my revenge." Brina pursed her lips, trying not to cry more.
Her eyes are already swollen enough and any more than this, she might not be able to blink her eyes itself.
Looking at her dad’s tomb she smiled sadly. Her papa used to help her to make decisions when she was in dilemma, but now..
He is no longer here with her to help her walk in the right path.
"Dad, what should I do and what should I choose? Will or Louis?" Brina asked, moving to her dad and mom’s tomb.
"Shouldn’t the answer be very easy, guys? It used to be very easy for to make a decision once and the answer would have always been Will."
"But why am I not able to be as obvious as before? Am I being selfish by wanting both of the person in my life?" Brina asked, this ti tears started streaming down her cheeks again.
"I’m feeling like I will die if Louis wouldn’t be here in my life. Not knowing myself, I have started relying so much on him that I was not able to make my own coffee without thinking about him." Brina laughed a bit, sniffling at the sa ti.
"I thought that if I co here and think peacefully for a few days, I would be able to resolve this issue and sohow make myself a cold hearted person and sacrifice my love for Will’s sake. But, why is it happening the other way around?"
"Every second and every minute of my day is making rember of Louis. No matter, how much I ever tried to erase my thoughts about him, I’m not be able to do it. The more I am trying, the more desperate I am feeling to go back to him."
"What should I do now?" Brina sobbed.
She leaned on to the tomb and let out all of her grief. She cried and cried that she fell asleep.. more like she fell unconscious.
She hasn’t eaten much either these days and she was not at all in the mood to cook.
So, she let herself starve and now she is in the verge of fainted.
Reviews
All reviews (0)