Chapter 28: Strange Things and Jealousy (1)
“I am ho...” I said slowly as I closed the door behind . I took off my shoes and dragged my feet towards my bed. Throwing myself onto my bed, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I let my body weakened by the pain haunted in my chest.
What is this strange feeling?
I was sure I was fine at campus, surrounded by people. No, not really fine, but it was enough to make ignore the pain in my chest. But, after that, surrounded by cold and darkness, the pain ca back with triple force, leaving breathless and pathetic.
But, no tears ca out. It’s a dry sorrow and I choked on it. I didn’t have the strength to get up. As much as it pained , I just wanted to be drowned in this misery. How pathetic I sounded, I knew. But, I didn’t care for now. I was still a human. I could feel the upside and down of this life. But, since when did I feel like this?
My mind traced back my life from the ti I could rember. I was sure my life was pretty much normal. There’s no abnormal activity around .
But, why do I feel like this? What is this strange feeling in my stomach? It weakened . It was as if it sucked my breath, fed on my life essence.
Is that too much? I should have laughed right now because of my cheesy thought. But, I didn’t have much strength to laugh on my silly thought. That’s how ssed up I thought I was.
.....
I passed day by day feeling the sa thing. Of course, I was happy when I was around Senior Rizal. I couldn’t count how many tis we have kissed. I couldn’t count how many tis I smiled around him. Yes, I was happy with him, but I still felt like there was sothing off with .
Every day felt the sa for .
Two months had passed. I still felt the sa. My relationship with Senior Rizal was more than fine. He even introduced to his family. I was nervous, of course. But, I gave my best. His family seed nice, but I could feel sothing wrong with how they treated . Maybe I just felt insecure because that was the first ti I was introduced to my boyfriend’s family. But, still, I felt sothing was off with . The strange feeling was still there in my stomach. I tried to ignore it every ti I consciously felt it was there. But, it never worked.
“I’m ho...” I said slowly. I couldn’t count how many tis I had said these sa words, but this ti, I realized I’ve been saying this to no one. As the door closed behind , I stunned in the dark. The strange feeling ca back full force.
Emptiness. Silence. It hit hard.
My eyes scanned the room, searching. But, I couldn’t find what I was searching. I got up on my bed and hid under my blanket. I felt like crying. It hurt so much in my chest. I was like sothing pressed deep inside it. This stifling emotion was really unbearable. I missed soone, I wanted to et soone, but I didn’t know who.
Cold breeze blew on my spine and I turned around instinctively. “Tom?” I called unconsciously. But, no one was there. And, that’s the ti when I realized who I missed. All mories ca back in my mind. How could I forget him?!
My tears were running down my face and I kept enchanting his na, asking him to co back until I tired myself out and fell asleep.
I miss you, Tom.
...
“I’m ho...” A familiar voice called as the door opened. The owner of the voice ca inside my room with a wide smile on his face.
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