Volu 2, Chapter 7: Confrontation
Translator : chelly
Editor / Proofreader : OD Dragon
“It’s a really small space.”
“I said I don’t mind.”
“No, really, it’s much smaller than you might think, Gotou-san.”
“It’s fine, don’t worry.”
We finished our al and took a train to the station nearest to ho. As we exited the gate, I felt a sudden surge of nervousness. I felt a slight chill in my stomach. I could feel my stomach churning and my heartbeat quickening.
“Oh, wow, there’s a movie theater!”
“Ah… it’s been there for a long ti.”
“Do you go there often?”
“No, not much.”
“Hmm… not much, huh? Even though it’s nearby.”
“Do you like movies, Gotou-san?”
“No, not really.”
“Oh, I see.”
So what was the sequence of events that led up to this? Because of her excitent about the movie theater, I thought she was a movie buff like Mishima.
Gotou-san was looking all over the place, watching everything around the train station as she followed . And then, she imdiately noticed a convenience store a short distance away.
“Oh, speaking of which, that little girl staying at your house, how is she doing tonight? Isn’t she hungry?”
“Ah, no…”
I shook my head, moved my left hand as if it were a cat’s paw, and then my right hand as if holding sothing from the kitchen.
“She can cook. I think she probably prepared sothing convenient today as well.”
When I said that, Gotou-san nodded her head with an expression on her face that seed to had a hidden aning.
“Proud of your wife?”
“N-no, you’re wrong!”
“Haha, I’m kidding.”
Gotou-san smiled amusedly and headed towards the convenience store.
“You’re buying sothing?”
“I have to buy a present.”
“No, you don’t have to.”
“That’s not for you to decide, is it?”
With her shoulders shrugging as she laughed, Gotou-san entered the convenience store. I can’t imagine Sayu being happy to receive a souvenir from Gotou-san at all. On the contrary, it was easier to imagine her looking at with a troubled smile.
As I walked into the convenience store, I saw Gotou-san standing in front of the sweets departnt, looking at the shelves. Without looking at , she asked:
“Does that girl like sweets?”
“…I’m not sure, but I don’t think she dislikes them.”
I rember the ti Sayu and I went to a family restaurant and ate parfait. From the way she reacted at the ti, I don’t know if she loved it or not, but she probably didn’t hate it.
“Then, I wonder if she would be happy if I bought sothing sweet and creamy…”
“I don’t know…”
“Maybe ice cream?”
“I’m not sure…”
Gotou-san suddenly glanced at . When our eyes t, I felt a little stunned.
“You don’t know much about her, do you?”
Gotou-san smiled and said that as if it was nothing.
“Well, there are eclairs, ice cream, snacks, and a bunch of stuff! There’s so much to buy. I wonder which one will give the win.”
“You don’t have to buy all that stuff…”
“No, no, it’s fine. Besides, it doesn’t make sense if I don’t bring her a present that will make her happy.”
Gotou-san said this happily and put the sweets and other snacks in the basket in her hand one after another. I guess she didn’t listen to my comnts at all. No, perhaps…
What Gotou-san said a while ago ca to mind.
You don’t know much about her, do you?
Those comnts I made may have been deed unhelpful. Now that I have thought about it, I’m not sure what kind of things Sayu likes or dislikes. I feel that I don’t know much about such trivial things.
“Aren’t you buying anything, Yoshida-kun?”
I was surprised when Gotou-san suddenly spoke to . She was standing right next to and she had a lot of stuff in her basket.
“A-ah… I think I’ll get a coffee.”
Pretending to be thinking about sothing, I nodded and headed to the beverages section. I picked up a coffee drink with milk and sugar, and Gotou-san grabbed from the side.
“Oh, what is it?”
“I’ll buy it for you.”
“No, no, it’s okay…”
Gotou-san moved her face closer to mine, interrupting my words. The rapid change in the physical distance between us made it impossible for to complete the second sentence.
“You’re doing a favor, and I want to thank you for that. Got it?”
“O-okay…”
Gotou-san slowly shook her head, smiled, and walked to the cash register. Looking at her figure from behind, I sighed. She sure was taking her ti.
We finished shopping and slowly made our way ho. If I was alone, I would walk quickly, but Gotou-san wears heels. If I don’t match her stride, she’ll be left behind.
It was strangely refreshing to be walking alone with Gotou-san and to hear the loud, clicking sound of her heels on the street at night. While making small talk along the way, Gotou-san asked sothing which caught by surprise.
“Hey, what’s her na?”
“Huh?”
“The girl’s na. What is it?”
“Ah…”
She was probably referring to Sayu. I wondered if it was all right to say her na, but she would probably ask later anyway even if I didn’t say it here.
“Her na’s Sayu.”
“Sayu-chan. Sounds nice.”
Gotou-san nodded, her mouth seed to be about to smile. And then she continued to ask .
“And her last na?”
“As for her last na, I think I caught a glimpse of it on her student ID card, but I wasn’t paying much attention.”
As I replied, Gotou-san suddenly burst into laughter. I looked at her to see what was going on, but she was looking at with a teasing look on her face.
“Although that girl has been an acquaintance of yours for a long ti, you don’t know her last na. I find that quite strange.”
I couldn’t respond to Gotou-san’s words with my mouth open in shock. I was totally screwed over. Back then at the yakiniku place, I lied to Gotou-san about my relationship with Sayu.
However, I was very careful not to let my eyes swim1around, and since she hadn’t followed up on it, I assud that it was deceptive. But, the fact that I was accused of this kind of trickery suggests that I was firmly under suspicion.
I looked at Gotou-san with a sideways glance, but she was still in a bit of a good mood and clicked her heels. She did not continue to ask questions, so it seed that she had no intention of pursuing the fact that I’m not sure what Sayu’s last na is. She was quiet and smiling as always so I didn’t know what she was thinking.
Her mysteriousness had been her charm, but now she looked at in a very eerie way. After that, Gotou-san hardly touched on the subject of Sayu, and as we walked around making bland conversation, we arrived ho in no ti at all.
“Can I ask you to wait for a mont, please?”
“Hmm? Why?”
I got to the door and as I turned the key in the lock, there was a sudden breeze of cowardice.
“Ah, I don’t think I cleaned up.”
“Huh? Wasn’t Sayu-chan doing the housework?”
“Well, yeah, but it might still be a bit ssy.”
“Stop trying to delay the inevitable, Yoshida-kun.”
Smiling, Gotou-san put her hand on the doorknob. As I held the door, Gotou-san plastered an even more forced smile on my face. It was a smirk. Then she grabbed the doorknob with both hands and pried it open.
I didn’t expect her to go that far. As I was holding the door with only one hand, I gave up and pulled my hand away from the door. When I looked inside, I saw Sayu standing in the hallway with her mouth hanging open. Sayu looked at and Gotou-san in turn, then tilted her head in confused silence.
“Uh, I’m ho…”
When I said that, Sayu finally smiled bitterly and let out a breath.
“Welco ho…”
When I looked to the side, I saw Gotou-san had a seemingly happy smile on her face.
“Good evening, Sayu-chan. I’m Gotou.”
Gotou-san said as she stared at Sayu and lifted the plastic bag in her hand.
“First of all, want so snacks?
Sayu smiled vaguely and then looked at . See, that’s why I knew this was going to happen. The expression on Sayu’s face was hardly different from the one I had imagined.
Gotou-san looked sideways at as if following Sayu’s gaze and then smiled at .
“I’m not sure how long I’m supposed to be standing here.”
“Oh, I’m sorry! Please co in…”
I let her through the front door with the sa vague expression as Sayu and closed the door. I felt the cold sweat running down my back. I tried desperately to imagine what Gotou-san would say to Sayu after this, but I couldn’t get my head around it at all.
“Do you like sweets?”
“Ah, yes, I like them…”
Compared to Gotou-san who, as always, was smiling at her own pace, Sayu was hesitantly talking and floundering. Then naturally, she let out a sigh.
*
“Hahaha! Basically you saw a girl on the street so you picked her up and decided to let her stay with you. You did sothing amazing without knowing it, Yoshida-kun.”
It was my first ti eting Gotou-san, and she was just what I had imagined from the things I have heard from Yoshida-san, except that she was even more difficult to read than I had imagined. It’ll be difficult to hide anything from her.
Gotou-san asked Yoshida-san and so questions while helping herself to the snacks she brought, but whenever we would try to cover sothing up, she would politely point it out. After a while, both Yoshida-san and I had given up and started to answer her questions honestly.
“Sayu-chan, did Yoshida-kun do anything strange to you?”
“Wha— Gotou-san!”
Gotou-san looked at with a mischievous smile and compared Yoshida-san’s reactions to mine. I looked across at Yoshida-san, who was obviously anxious and chuckled at him. Why is he anxious? He didn’t do anything.
“He hasn’t done anything to . I was really surprised.”
When I answered, Gotou-san squinted a little and nodded.
“Surprised, huh?”
Gotou-san stared at so closely that I looked away in a hurry. I had trouble with the way she was looking at . I felt as if she was looking into my heart.
“Well, Yoshida-kun doesn’t seem to be interested in younger people. You’re quite lucky, Sayu-chan.”
“Even if I were interested, I wouldn’t lay a hand on her.”
“Eh~ I’m not so sure about that.”
“Hey! I’m not such an easy man!”
“Haha, it’s a joke.”
Gotou-san was teasing Yoshida-san. On the other hand, Yoshida-san reacted by looking a little embarrassed. The exchange was hilarious, and it was easy to see that these two had developed a friendship over the course of their ti at work. It beca clear to that their relationship had gone beyond that.
It was supposed to be nice, but oddly enough, it bothered . Did I show it in any way? As I looked away, repressing a hazy feeling, I had the feeling that Gotou-san was staring at . When I turned my gaze in her direction, our eyes t as she looked into my face.
“What’s wrong?”
“Ah, no… it’s nothing.”
“Your face says otherwise, though.”
Gotou-san smiled persistently while staring at . Ah, that smile, I really wish you would stop it. It was as if her smile completely hid her true nature. The eeriness of not knowing what was hidden in her smile was robbing of words to say.
“Really, it’s nothing. Maybe I had too much dinner.”
I said to keep up appearances. Gotou-san responded with an “I see” and a nod, not probing further. She probably knew my answer was improvised yet she didn’t insist. I was relieved, but at the sa ti, I thought it was a bit creepy.
“Speaking of which, what did you have for dinner?”
Yoshida-san was silent for a mont then asked this as if trying to change the subject, and to help him I looked up and answered.
“at and potatoes. It was pretty good.”
“Oh, is that so? Such a sha that I couldn’t have it freshly made.”
“That’s right. Be sure to eat so tomorrow morning.”
“Got it.”
When Yoshida-san and I were talking casually like we usually do, Gotou-san burst out laughing. She funnily shook her shoulders and then gave us a sly look.
“You’re like newlyweds.”
“No, seriously, stop it.”
Yoshida-san’s reaction seed to be amusing for Gotou-san as she laughed even more. I found the way she laughed funny as it was similar to a child’s.
“I’m going to the bathroom.”
“Okay, see you later!”
Yoshida-san stood up and walked down the hallway to the door of the toilet. Only Gotou-san and I were left in the room. As I was breaking out in a cold sweat by myself, trying to figure out what to say, or even if I needed to say anything at all, Gotou-san let out a sigh and then said in a low voice:
“Hey, Sayu-chan.”
“…Yes?”
Gotou-san and I looked into each other’s eyes. A smile appeared on her face that seed to be hiding sothing until now. However, it was a gentle smile and she had a straight look that seed to pierce my eyes, and it stung.
“I’d like to have a word with you in private.”
“Alone?”
“That’s right.”
Gotou-san nodded, then raised her index finger suggestively.
“Maybe there’s sothing you want to ask , just as there’s sothing I want to ask you too? I wonder.”
I was irritated by her expression, which seed to indicate that she was seeing right through . But she was right, there was only one thing I had to ask her.
I think Gotou-san implicitly presented with the “terms of exchange.” She was implying that now that we had the opportunity to be alone together, we could answer each other’s questions. I think she really is a sly person. That being said, I don’t really have a choice.
“I’ll make ti.”
When I answered, Gotou-san smiled and bowed her head slightly.
“Thanks.”
“No, it’s…”
Turning away from Gotou-san, I waited for Yoshida-san to co out of the bathroom. It should have been only a few minutes, but it felt like a long ti. I heard the sound of the toilet flushing and then Yoshida-san ca out of the bathroom. I turned around and gave an excuse I had just thought up.
“Yoshida-san, sorry, I forgot to buy the ingredients for breakfast tomorrow.”
When I said that, Yoshida-san stood still for a mont, but quickly tilted his head and responded.
“I don’t mind. I can just go grab sothing tomorrow.”
“No way, you have to eat properly in the morning.”
“There’s nothing we can do about it if you haven’t bought ingredients.”
“No, I an, that’s why…”
While feeling guilty for deceiving Yoshida-san, I put a fake smile on my face.
“Would it be possible for you to go buy them now? It’s almost 10 p.m. and I might get called out for being outdoors at this ti…”
As I said this, Yoshida-san raised his eyebrows and looked at , then Gotou-san in turn.
“Well, I don’t mind making a trip out but… are you two going to be okay?”
“It’s fine. We’ll have a fun chat with each other. Right, Sayu-chan?”
“Ah, yes… we’ll be fine. So could I count on you?”
Gotou-san intentionally laughed at Yoshida-san. When I nodded, Yoshida-san sighed a little and nodded his head.
“What do I need to buy?”
“I need so eggs, nira2, and also miso.”
“Got it.”
Yoshida-san glanced at Gotou-san once more, then took his wallet and cigarettes out of his business bag, which he kept at the side of the corridor, and headed for the door.
“I’ll be back after I’ve had a smoke, so it might take a little while.”
“Okay. Have a good one.”
Yoshida-san walked out of the door and closed it. There was silence for a short while.
“Now then.”
Gotou-san spoke suddenly. When I lifted my gaze, I was t with eyes staring straight at .
“So, can I ask you first?”
“…Yes.”
When I nodded, Gotou-san put on a different, slightly darker smile than before and asked .
“Is it true that you’re a high school student?”
“It’s true.”
“Where are you from?”
The question left speechless for a mont. I was thinking if I should tell her the truth or not. But I thought that if I were to lie, she would definitely catch .
It’s not a question of whether I should tell the truth or not anymore. It’s a situation where I just have to tell her. I gulped and answered.
“From… Hokkaido.”
“Since when did you run away from ho?”
“More than half a year ago.”
Gotou-san didn’t change her expression at all when she heard my answer. Nonchalantly, she continued asking serious questions.
“Why did you do it?”
The question reminded of nurous events that took place in Asahikawa, and I shook my head.
“…I don’t want to answer that.”
“…Okay, I understand.”
Gotou-san nodded quietly at my response.
“I’m not going to ask you what circumstances led you to run away from ho and end up all the way out here.”
Gotou-san’s voice was gentle. I could tell she was taking into consideration my ntal state. I was glad that I didn’t have to lie to her. It was frightening that this person could read my mind, but it was very clear she speaks to with the utmost respect. I can’t do a disservice to soone who respects so much.
“However.”
I felt that the tone of Gotou-san’s voice had diminished a little.
“There’s one thing I need to clarify.”
Gotou-san looked in the eyes when she said this. I also looked her in the eyes. Her eyes look like they’re going to suck in. I felt my heart racing.
“I’m asking this as Yoshida-kun’s “friend” and as soone who’s a “stranger” to you.”
After saying that, Gotou-san smiled. And then, in an instant, the smile disappeared from her face. She gave a cold look which seed to pierce my eyes.
“How long do you intend to stay here?”
After Gotou-san said that, I bowed my head a little. It felt like my heart was about to burst.
I too have thought about it many tis since coming here. And now, she is making face that inescapable question head-on, which I have been trying to avoid answering over and over.
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1 Yoshida used the term “swim” which Asami also used to describe his eyes when lying in Volu 2 Chapter 3.
2 Is the Japanese na for garlic chives. Related to the onion, it’s long flat leaves look like blades of grass, but it has a mild garlicky fragrance and pleasantly fibrous texture that is almost crunchy.
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