A Kung Fu student asks his teacher, "Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated."
And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers, "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun and their wings seeming like flas?"
"Yes, my master, I have."
"And a waterfall, spilling mightily over the stones without taking anything out of its proper place?"
"Yes, my master, I have witnessed it."
"And the moon, when it touches the calm water to reflect all its enormous beauty?"
"Yes, my master, I have also seen this marvellous phenonon."
"That is the problem. You keep watching all this shit instead of training."
———
The above got nothing to do with the current situation I have at hand right now.
Explosions are happening around my castle and more than that, an Alien broke the roof and now he was standing on the table in front of .
'On the stats.'
[ Stats On. ]
Now I was safe. Well, even if I don't turn on the stats I'll still be safe. I have passive skills that can never let suffer any injuries.
But this attack is too sudden and the roof of the castle should be harder than that.
"I am an Alien!" The alien shouted.
Don't they have nas? Oh yes. They have one. I rember. They have long weird nas. And this alien looked the sa as that one who arrived at the village. Even the white sneakers were the sa.
"It's an Awakened Alien!" Erect shouted.
All the Heroes left their seats and they all stood behind .
You should stand in front of , people. I am the King.
"How do you know he is an Awakened one?" I asked.
"The antennas and those white relics. Only awakened aliens have them."
Erect shared a characteristic and he called white sneakers a relic.
"What makes them awake?" I asked another question. The Alien should wait before I get so facts straight.
"When an Alien is born as a result of Gangbang, they are called Awakened. They are stronger than average Aliens. Only you can defeat them, my lord."
Wait what..
"Gangbang?"
"Yes, my lord. They had captured the Gangbang continent just to produce more Awakened Aliens. Their culture is way different from us Humans or other races."
I don't think this is about culture. They are just degenerates.
"I am an Alien!"
"I heard you the first ti."
"I am here to get revenge for my friend. Who is Racist here?"
"Probably everyone." Erect answered.
I nodded. That was good. He is learning.
"No! The one who killed my friend, Rokagragathanologicafreyalter! That Racis T. Where is he?" The Alien barked.
So he was looking for . Guess, the notification reached the skies of Aliens too.
"I am Racis." I stepped forward and then added, "What's up? Other than your antennas of course."
"Hahahahahahaha!" The Heroes erupted in laughter. The sa as before.
"Don't joke, my lord. I might do sothing worthy of punishnt again." Beater spoke.
Shit. I forgot about him.
"You are prohibited to do that when I am around. That's my order."
Beater gave a slow nod. I hope he agreed.
"Don't make fun of !" The Alien was still there.
"Get down from the table first. That's bad manners."
"Oh. My bad."
The Alien began descending.
"To hell with that!" But he snapped the next second.
He raised his scythe hand and brought it down on the table.
THUMP!
The table broke. And every big sound doesn't sound like a thump but I can't think of anything else for now.
But he shouldn't have broken the table. It was a long one. I haven't seen such tables in real life before.
"You all go and handle the Aliens who attacked outside. I'll deal with him."
"As you say." The Heroes jumped out of the window of the castle.
But Erect remained with .
"You won't go?" I asked.
"I am your right hand man, my lord. I'll stay by your side, no pun intended."
Good one.
"Sure. Suit yourself."
Erect nodded and I finally focused on the Awakened Alien.
He raised his scythe again and this ti, he brought it down on my head.
TUN!
Nothing happened to of course.
The alien seed enraged because of that and he unleashed attacks after attack all over my body.
Tun, tun, happened in the room but I was fine.
He even hit between my legs but this ti I didn't protect myself. I was safe.
"Why are you not dying? Die. Die. Die. Die."
The Alien attacked constantly and I felt pity for him.
After thirty minutes, he finally stopped.
He sat on his knees in front of , panting.
"You are strong. No wonder you are the King. No Human withstood my attacks for such a long ti."
"Can I ask you sothing?" I said.
"Shoot."
"Where do you get those sneakers from?" I asked before I could accidentally kill him.
"Sneakers? What are you talking about?" The Alien didn't understand.
"The white relics I an. On your feet."
"Oh. We saw it on one of the planets. We found it nice so we made so for ourselves. Only Awakened ones are allowed to wear it."
"Was it Earth?"
"Yes. That was the na."
I sat down in front of the Alien after hearing that.
"Why haven't you guys attacked Earth? Just like you did here?" That was a logical question.
"We are not mad. We have seen what those guys do to aliens. You killed one of our kind just because he wanted so stones. They so cheap."
That was a movie tho-never mind.
"And also," The Alien added. "They don't need us to attack. They will destroy their planets themselves."
Wow.
"Truest words never spoken." I raised my hand to pat the Alien. But I stopped. I would have killed him.
"But you know, I thought you didn't visit Earth because of its ratings." I said.
"Why is that?" The Alien asked and the joke I wanted to say for a long ti finally saw the light of the day.
"I an, it only has One star."
Silence.
Erect didn't even fake a laugh this ti.
The Alien also stared at with his big red eyes.
"I am sor-"
"That was good."
"Huh?"
"That was really good. It only has one star. Sun. And you connected it with the stars of a rating. It's funny. Tell more."
The Alien leaned towards . He was curious. He wanted to hear more.
Is this real? And I am supposed to kill these innocent creatures?
"Tell ." The Alien insisted.
I won't let him down.
"What did the Aliens think of the anti-gravity book?"
"What?" He asked.
I smiled. "They liked it so much they couldn't put it down."
And then it ca...
"Hahaha. That's funny. They couldn't put it down.. Amazing."
The real laughter. No fake. He was laughing for real.
I knew it. Grandma was right...
My cody was really out of the world.
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