The Right Assistant Minister of the Ministry of Personnel’s first reaction was actually: Damn! My reputation for getting things done with bribes is ruined!
His second reaction, only after that, was: My corruption has been exposed!
His heart pounded, and he silently cried out in misery. But given the setting, he couldn’t plead for rcy or show remorse in front of the emperor. He could only tremble all the way ho after the emperor left.
Thinking that his fate was either to be beaten to death or dismissed and exiled, the Right Assistant Minister of the Ministry of Personnel simply ordered all the strong liquor from his wine cellar to be brought out and started pouring entire jars of it down his throat.
Drinking while crying, drinking and vomiting on the floor.
Did he regret it? Yes! But not because he accepted bribes—he regretted not being careful enough.
The next morning, after drinking all night, the Right Assistant Minister, reeking of alcohol and seemingly with his brain soaked in liquor, staggered into court, adding another cri to his na. The old emperor first charged him with misconduct in the imperial presence, ordering him to be suspended and confined at ho for reflection. A few days later, the Jinyiwei “coincidentally” discovered evidence of his bribery. Once reported, his fate was sealed—
The emperor’s ruling: He would be permanently barred from holding any official position, and his descendants would be banned from governnt service for three generations.
—Because not only did he accept bribes, but he also abused his power by arranging for every county magistrate who had served seven years and had the surna Sun to enter the Hanlin Academy.
As for the magistrate of Shangyuan County, he was, of course, dismissed and investigated as well.
But Xu Yanmiao knew none of this.
At the mont, he was at the imperial examination hall, too busy to care about anyone else’s corruption.
Before the exams began, the examiners had to enter the examination hall one month in advance to finalize the exam questions. The topics previously discussed with the Minister of War were just one of many options. As the chief examiner, Xu Yanmiao couldn’t just prepare a single exam—he had to prepare three to five versions for the emperor to choose from.
Furthermore, once inside the examination hall, the examiners were locked in and prohibited from leaving until after the exam results were announced.
Too busy to even breathe—who had ti to worry about corruption scandals?!
A month later, Xu Yanmiao erged looking dazed, his steps unsteady, like a ghost that had just floated up from the underworld.
“I can finally res—”
A Censorate official suddenly pinched Xu Yanmiao’s arm. “Forgive , Master Xu! His Majesty has decreed that the chief examiner must also be present for the inspection.”
If he didn’t pinch him, Xu Yanmiao was about to pass out on the spot.
Xu Yanmiao jolted awake. “When does it start?”
The Censorate official replied, “Fourth watch.”
Xu Yanmiao quickly calculated the ti.
[1 AM to 3 AM… The candidates are entering the exam hall at that hour?!]
So miserable.
Even worse than the modern gaokao.
Xu Yanmiao pinched his own arm, then asked, “How long can I sleep?”
The Censorate official answered, “Half a day.”
Xu Yanmiao imdiately had a reclining chair brought over, slumped into it at an angle, draped a blank scroll over his face, and closed his eyes. “Wake when it’s ti.”
Half a day later, the candidates, freshly bathed from the public bathhouse, began waiting for roll call to enter the examination hall.
Xu Yanmiao sat before a small oil lamp, holding a registry as he began the roll call—
“Liu Yuan, Confucian scholar from Min County, Fujian…”
“Zhang Shu, Confucian scholar from Yin County, Zhejiang…”
“Ma Chaobi, Confucian scholar from Putian County, Fujian…”
For each na called, he would compare the person’s appearance with the records before allowing them to enter the examination hall.
“Dong Chongdai, Confucian scholar from Hejin County, Shanxi…”
Xu Yanmiao’s voice suddenly cut off as he lifted his gaze to look at the examinee. The man eyed him warily. “May I ask, official, is there sothing wrong with my place of origin?”
The issue wasn’t with his place of origin. The problem was…
Xu Yanmiao glanced at the information from his system, waved his hand, and soldiers imdiately stepped forward at his command. “Remove his waistcoat.”
The examinee’s face instantly turned pale as paper. Looking humiliated, he protested, “The bathing process already ensures we carry nothing hidden. Even our freshly changed clothes were provided by the court! Are you accusing of cheating? This is outrageous! I refuse to take the exam!”
Saying this, he turned as if to storm away, tears brimming in his eyes.
The surrounding scholars were moved by his plight and glared angrily at Xu Yanmiao.
Xu Yanmiao, however, looked genuinely confused.
Oh, he wasn’t confused about their feelings of humiliation. It was more like—“I pointed it out so obviously. Why does he still think this is just a coincidence and that he can get away with it?”
A Censorate official inwardly whispered in response: Wishful thinking. Not just this examinee— even the entire central governnt knows you have a divine tool, yet corruption and bribery continue unchecked.
Then, stepping forward, the official firmly held down the examinee from Shanxi’s Hejin County and forcibly removed his waistcoat. Glancing at it, he smiled pleasantly. “And what do we have written here?”
The examinee, who monts ago was indignant, now trembled like a leaf. “N-nothing…”
The other scholars widened their eyes. So quickly caught on and angrily exclaid, “I trusted you! And you were cheating?!”
As the words fell, the Censorate official unfolded the waistcoat, lifted it up, and shook it in front of the crowd. The gathered scholars erupted in shock.
The text on the fabric was barely larger than an ant (just 3-4 milliters in size)—and upon closer inspection, it contained handwritten excerpts from the Four Books and Five Classics!
Over 40,000 characters, ticulously written in brush script!
With this level of skill, why not pursue sothing respectable instead of cheating in the imperial exam?!
The Censorate official waved his hand. “Take this cheater to the side and place him in a cangue. Let him stand outside the examination hall for a month!”
With the wooden cangue locked around his neck, the cheating examinee stood outside the exam hall, exposed for all passing scholars to see. Each glance burned him with sha. Worse yet, the cangue’s wooden beam lifted his chin, making it impossible for him to lower his head.
Hearing others whispering and gossiping about him, his tears stread down uncontrollably, falling onto the wooden fra of his punishnt.
If he had known, he would never have bribed the inspectors responsible for the security check.
—This ti, he was truly crying.
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