Alone?
Jun Lii shook his head subconsciously, "I... I don’t know..."
Sotis, it feels like being alone...
Sotis, it feels like it’s not...
He even had so trouble distinguishing whether he had fallen for Ah Xing first, or whether it was because of Zihu’s influence that he had fallen for her?
"I’ve never felt like you two were separate people..." Yan Yueqing looked at his conflicted and confused expression and smiled gently, "At most, I thought... there might be two different personalities..."
Her soothing tone was like a stream lting under the snow mountain in early spring, bringing signs of life and warmth to the frozen heart.
"I once saw a short film about a carefree little boy who ets a middle-aged man wanting to jump off a bridge. He didn’t understand why the man wanted to die when life was so beautiful, so he offered him the sugar-coated hawthorn sticks he had just bought...
As he grew up, suffocated by life, emotions, and various other factors... until his parents died, becoming the last straw, he couldn’t bear it any longer. Destitute, he walked to the bridge, wanting to jump into the river to commit suicide! And then... a little boy ca over, grabbed the hem of his clothes, innocently offering him a sugar-coated hawthorn stick he’d just bought..."
She paused, "This film won a design award at the ti, and many had different interpretations of it. So felt it was a redemption piece where the little boy saved his future self by crossing through ti and space! Others thought that the boy at the end of the film was just another kind-hearted little fellow! It’s not about redemption, but continuation..."
Jun Lii looked at her intently, "And... what does Ah Xing think?"
"?" Yueqing pondered for two seconds, then looked up at the roses on the ceiling, "I think, whether it’s redemption or continuation isn’t important... What’s important is, he once saved soone, and now soone has saved him."
"Just like you said, Zihu ca back in ti to prevent the tragic ending of his world. He aid to change the outco, not to take over your body. You’ve... always been one and the sa, haven’t you?"
"It may be hard for you to understand when put this way, but let ask you, if I in this world still doesn’t have a good outco, would you, like him, rush into the stream of ti without a second thought to change fate?"
Jun Lii didn’t hesitate, "Of course!"
"Well, there you have it!" Yan Yueqing stated plainly, "Perhaps... when you get to the next world and et that world’s Jun Lii, you beco the new Su Zihu. Your goal is only to change all this... And the Jun Lii of that world, because of your sudden arrival, becos sensitive and jealous... isn’t it... history repeating itself?"
Jun Lii laughed at his own reflection: "Yes, it’s as if trapped in a cycle."
"You haven’t experienced the painful years Zihu has endured, just like the little boy hasn’t experienced everything that cos with growing up. You always approach each thing with the most original intentions. But once you’re grown up, are you not yourselves anymore?"
"Zihu’s arrival may seem like it’s another person, but actually... he’s simply making choices for your future self earlier. It’s like going back to the past and seeing my younger self about to step into a pit; how could I not warn her?"
"But with my stubborn nature, even if I did warn her, she probably wouldn’t listen; she’d still insist on hitting the wall, falling into that pit... until she grows up and gets a chance to return to the past and see her stubborn, persistent self again."
"It’s the sa with , and it’s the sa with you... Even if Zihu warned you, would you listen to everything? I don’t think so... Our feelings back then were pure, they could not be manipulated by soone else’s intervention!"
"I like you because I simply really like you... I like Zihu because he is a future version of you... It might be a bit unfair to him to say this, but if he weren’t your future self and just so other Remnant Soul, I would have been thinking about how to extract him from your body!"
"As for Zihu, he once talked to about it... he loves , but what he loves is the ti we’re spending together again. It’s like if you could go back to the past and et as a little girl, knowing that she would grow up to be your wife, would you date that little girl ?"
Jun Lii imdiately shook his head, "Of course not!"
Dating a child? That would be outright perverse, wouldn’t it?
"Yes, you wouldn’t, and neither would Zihu... He was just very happy that he could finally change that tragic ending! And that emotion could not affect your feelings for ... From beginning to end, it’s been us together... hasn’t it?"
Jun Lii suddenly choked up.
Indeed, she was utterly right.
If it were him who dove into the ti stream and travelled back to et the younger Jun Lii and Ah Xing... would he possess that Jun Lii’s body and date Ah Xing?
He wouldn’t...
He would just quietly watch things unfold, reminding his younger self as much as possible about what to watch out for to safeguard the future.
What he was grateful for and enjoyed was seeing Ah Xing again.
Avoiding the despair of her dissolving in her pri...
Ensuring she was alright, everything was alright, a perfect ending worthy of his struggles and efforts.
In other words...
Zihu was him!
His future self, with decades more of painful experiences.
And all the while, had he been competing against his future self?
What Zihu really wanted wasn’t to possess anything for himself, but...
For everyone to live well...
At this point, Yan Yueqing heaved a long sigh.
"I understood this principle quite so ti ago, but seeing you daily jealous and cute, I always wanted to tease you a little more. Later... the explosion happened so suddenly, I saw Zihu burst out of your body to protect , and when I woke up, neither of you were there... I was so scared..."
"Later, I found an extra Remnant Soul inside and spent days arguing with it, I temporarily didn’t dare to contact you, worried that you would be concerned..."
She lowered her lashes, recalling her last mories before departure, her voice turning sowhat cold.
"Not long after giving birth, she seized an opportunity, held this body hostage, and jumped from the building, my consciousness fading away... but at that mont, I wasn’t scared at all, because I knew you would co to find ... you would, like the future Zihu, move heaven and earth, overco all obstacles to find ..."
"However, if that were the case, then it would be falling into a cycle... you would beco the new Su Zihu, going back to the previous Jun Lii and Ah Xing, endlessly... I guess Zihu thought the sa, which is why he decided to enter the stream of ti to find , letting you stay in this world..."
Having said this, Yan Yueqing looked earnestly at him, "You think that’s right, don’t you?"
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