"Why did I do that?"
> She’s probably busy this ti of day. What am I expecting? <
But not long after I scolded myself, huddled underneath my wolf spirit as a fox... in my mindscape filled with fake and cheerfully clear skies... the vibration and a chi ca. The reply ca against all my expectations.
K: [It looks tasty.]
Lightning that I didn’t notice caused its loud crack of noise once again. But I barely flinched with my focus stolen by the fact that she responded. My fingers moved slowly across the screen, typing back a response.
C: [It was.]
The quickest one I could think of. Even if it felt inadequate for what I’m feeling right now. Then I closed my eyes and... tried not to throw up.
"Maybe it was not the wisest thing to do. To gorge myself on food when I knew I’d be stuck here afraid..."
Another ssage ca in a few minutes later. Even though I hadn’t really left much of a sense of desire to continue the conversation... I assud she would just go back to doing whatever she was doing.
K: [That’s a beautiful pike. Do you have a favorite fish to catch? Or eat?]
I stared at the questions, recognizing the probing for what it was. She was trying to draw into talking and... learn more about . Part of wanted to end this interaction before I revealed too much.
That part said that she wouldn’t care if I didn’t respond. That if I just ignored answering, she might get bored. Might treat like the suitors that saw as an uncooperative, bad-tempered woman.
> Which I was. Intentionally. <
But another part - the part that was grateful for any distraction from the storm raging outside... made my fingers move across the screen’s keyboard. Agonizingly slowly.
C: [Not really.]
"Quite engaging. Looks exactly like you want her to keep-"
K: [Did you learn to fish from soone?]
C: [No. Instinct.]
The top edge of the phone rushes and strikes my forehead, painfully, as my head falls forward onto it. Giving responses but giving nothing - like this is a political matter. What am I doing?
I sigh and rub the spot with the back of my hand before typing sothing... just a little more.
C: [Just saw it and wanted it.]
K: [I understand the feeling.]
K: [When it cos to things you want to eat.]
K: [Like a thick cut steak or so other kind of food, I an.]
Even Vrika can tell that the responses were coming too quickly now. Each quick chi from my phone just punctuated a different imdiate way of reading her statents. Is she not stopping to review them before sending?
"Too honest with comparing her desire, too quick to clarify it wasn’t about , then too dirty minded and needed yet another attempt. Making her that nervous over what she says to ... I should feel bad."
My wolf suggests to that if that’s what I think - I should stop smirking. But I can’t help it. Texting is actually this fun? All I can think of are questions that make her realize she isn’t fooling .
> Yes, I know you don’t get it. But just imagine it like your beloved Alpha is sitting on the other side with her tail between her legs after getting my attention. Maybe even rolled over and showing her belly? <
The imagery ignites so understanding in the spirit. All at once, it is intrigued and confused... because it does not consider to be an Alpha that could make her submit at all. Which is fine, I have never considered my personality as fitting to beco one either.
But since when does not being the type to be in charge of everything an I can’t want to ’be in charge’ of who is in charge? I do not get along with my original mother - I rarely even call her by actual na.
Yet her hold over my father was one quality of hers which I’ve never particularly disliked. And it made the idea to send another photo worm its way in my head. Maybe not the one hugging the side of the rock, but another nearly as-
K: [Are you sowhere safe and dry?]
The device buzzed in my hands with this acknowledgnt that she knew exactly what our... conversation was originally about. Not just sending sothing because I cared to share it. Or for idle ’chitchat’.
I’d reached out during distress. Did she know that from the beginning and answer quickly? It might be raining in the city also. Or was this sothing she just ca up with along the way...
C: [Yes.]
After typing and sending another simple response, I accidentally brushed against an icon on the keyboard I’d noticed before. Suddenly the interface changed with the words [voice-to-text] displayed as a description.
"...Much safer than I was last ti there was lightning... and you were there to potentially mark in my sleep."
Watching the words appear on screen, I realize the computer technology in this ’software’ was surprisingly accurate. Picking up my voice clearly and scribing the ssage despite the rain drumming against the container’s roof.
But I select and delete all of it only seconds later. It revealed more than I’d intended - that I was still thinking about yesterday morning. That’s not sothing she needs to know!
K: [Good. Do you... need to talk over the phone? I’m free for you to call.]
Despite everything, I found her response amusing. As much as I feel it could be ’concern’, as she claims, I also feel like she’s just being silly and taking a little advantage. Almost bluntly asking to hear my voice by offering her own.
> What would I even say? I wasn’t exactly great conversation last thunderstorm... or really, at any point we’ve t. Reactive, dismissive, and haughty. <
Yet, there’s sothing appealing about the idea of her voice in my ear right now. Through the phone. Soft and controlled, that way it was... well, in practically every point we’ve t. I decided to reply with the speech conversion, but it was still sothing fairly terse.
Sothing not ready to let have things like that. Things that I’ll grow to rely on.
C: [Maybe later. The storm is loud.]
K: [Thunder bothering you?]
Such a direct question again. I stare at it, debating whether to deflect or simply be honest. Honesty won this ti, perhaps because I’m already feeling bold from her prior nervous slip. I intentionally pick a provocative answer.
C: [It was.]
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