(BL) Hunting The Field Guide Chapter 315: Suppression never works

"-ease wake up. Please wake up. Please wake up." Bleary-eyed, Kellen felt like he was listening to a mantra, over and over and over. Blinking, having passed out the night prior shortly after Rhys ca for what felt like the 100th ti, Kellen was sure he had only been asleep for a few hours.

Waking up to soone chanting wasn’t exactly sothing he had expected, nor was he excited for.

"Rhys?" Kellen mumbled, so tired he didn’t wake up imdiately. He shifted, blinking because he anticipated it being dark but found that the lamp furthest away from him had been turned on. That was even more surprising. Kellen usually woke up when light was introduced to his sleeping area. He must have been really tired then.

Rhys was beside him on the ground on his knees. His hands were on Kellen’s arm, his eyes wide and yellow and his expression stark. He looked incredibly unwell, his lips pale, and Kellen only felt confused.

"Rhys? Why are you not on the bed?" Kellen asked and Rhys scanned him. His grip on Kellen’s arm was tight, almost painful, but Kellen could tell he was shaking.

"I...Are you alright?" Rhys asked quietly, as if he couldn’t get the words out of his mouth. Kellen’s frown deepened. What the hell was wrong with him? Why was he reacting like this?

"I’m just tired. Why? Did sothing happen? What ti is it?" Kellen asked and Rhys shook his head, swallowing. He didn’t stop shaking, and Kellen, waking up more, got concerned. He slowly sat up, wincing at the pain in his chest and thigh. Rhys flinched.

Kellen, sensing that sothing was seriously wrong, didn’t let Rhys withdraw his hand and instead grabbed it as he tried to withdraw it. Rhys flinched, but didn’t tug his hand away and Kellen stared at him.

"Rhys, what’s wrong? Why are you think this? I’m tired, so my brain isn’t working as fast as it should." Kellen told him and Rhys swallowed.

"I...I don’t really rember what I did to you. I don’t...I didn’t expect that I would lose that part of . I’m freaking out. I’ve been worrying since I...since I ca back that I hurt you. And then I turned and you were lying so still on the bed that I just...I started panicking." Tears started rolling down his cheeks and Kellen moved. He didn’t care about his injury and threw his legs over the side of the bed, pushing until Rhys was in between his thighs and Kellen grabbed him, wrapping his arms around his head and pulling him to his chest.

"Oh Rhys. No. No you didn’t hurt . Not at all. You were very gentle. It’s okay. I’m awake. I’m alive. You would never do sothing like that to ." Kellen told him, soothing him as Rhys grabbed onto him, soaking his shirt.

"I was so scared. You wouldn’t wake up. You almost always wake up, even if it’s slightly. You didn’t." Kellen wondered what he ant by that. Was Rhys...checking to see if Kellen was alive during the night when they were sleeping together? Was that sothing he had been doing this whole ti? Kellen didn’t feel anymore tired compared to normal, so maybe he was just taking him out of REM, but not fully waking him up?

Kellen wasn’t sure, since he wasn’t an expert in the field, but this was alarming. It was a strange thing to do, no matter if Rhys was an Esper or not. It was an especially strange thing to do given the circumstances.

"It’s okay. I was just really, really tired. You ma-helped cum a lot, and it took it out of ." Rhys shook.

"Was it too much? Did it hurt? Oh god, I’m so sorry Kellen. This was why I told you it wasn’t smart or safe to do. I get so-" Kellen grabbed his head, jerking him back to et his gaze. Kellen’s heart broke as he stared at the trails of tears leaving those yellow eyes. He looked like a ss and Kellen felt his face twist as well.

"Rhys, baby, my pair, shut the fuck up." Rhys hiccupped, but he didn’t stop crying. "I’m the one who told you to do it, and I have no regrets. So what if you made cum a few more tis than I’m used to? You already warned that I was going to need a higher sex drive to match you, and I didn’t really listen to you. It’s okay. I’m fine. I’m not upset, you didn’t yank my dick off or anything like that. You didn’t hurt at all. You were very gentle, very gentle, and even if you rarely spoke, you were constantly making sure I was with you. Honestly, you felt like you were upset I wasn’t cuming as much as you were. You felt bad even in the mont." Kellen told him, holding onto his cheeks as he spoke to one of the most powerful S Class Espers in the city. Rhys sniffed, the tears continuing.

"I could have scared you into saying that." He mumbled, his mouth not quite working as Kellen held it. Kellen scowled.

"Why the hell would I be intimidated by you?" Kellen demanded, and Rhys stared at him in shock.

"I-I’m an S Class?" Rhys stuttered and Kellen scowled further.

"You’re my pair, and you’ve shown over and over that while you didn’t really respect my boundaries when you were trying to get to notice you, you’ve been every inch of a respectful man when it ca to my boundaries when I really ant them. You might go too far sotis, but you would never threaten in the way you are suggesting. If you did? I would have sent you to the dical Bay." Kellen growled. "You would not have woken up in my bed, am I clear? You did nothing to be worrying about, Rhys, I an it. I wish there was so way I could share my mories with you to prove to you that what I’m saying is true, but you’re just going to have to trust ." Rhys hiccupped again, and Kellen, not able to take it anymore, bent and pressed kisses against Rhys’ under eyes.

It was killing him that the man was crying.

Rhys’ grip on his tightened as Kellen went back and forth, kissing the tears away under both of his eyes, gentling him carefully as the man held onto him.

"I-I didn’t hurt you?" Rhys whispered and Kellen sighed.

"Not at all. You covered in cum, but that’s about it. You were even a gentleman and wiped it off my face so it didn’t get into my eyes." Kellen told him warmly, trying to keep his tone light. This was quite the thing to wake up from a dead sleep into. Rhys stared up at Kellen, the tears slowing after Kellen’s kisses.

"That’s all I did? Cum?" Rhys asked and Kellen nodded.

"A lot. Honestly, that did concern . Are you okay? I didn’t think n could cum that much." Kellen said and Rhys’ face twisted into an expression that Kellen couldn’t read.

"It’s...linked to my powers." Kellen stared at him, unblinking, before he burst into laughter.

"What the fuck? That’s so random. Thank god I’m not a girl or I wouldn’t even have a chance. I think I’d be pregnant the first ti we slept together." Rhys’ face flushed and he dropped his gaze, looking away from Kellen. He licked his lips, and Kellen realised that colour had returned back to them. Thank goodness.

"Don’t joke about that. It was sothing scary to find out for . I had no idea my powers would affect my balls until I had the...first episode like this. Thankfully, I was with only males at the ti, but it was..." Rhys went white as he spoke about it, clearly thinking sothing stupid as Kellen nodded along, stroking his skin with his fingers.

"Yes, that is lucky. Otherwise, there would be so young Rhys Thatcher’s running around, hmm?" Kellen teased, his smile reaching his eyes when Rhys glanced at him.

"You aren’t...upset?" He asked carefully, and Kellen realised that sothing was clearly not right with Rhys. For as much as his bravado covered him and made him appear that he was perfect, or that he let his facade crack every once in a while, this man, this insecure man, might be the real Rhys.

Kellen cared for him no matter what, but it did hurt a bit that it had to take Rhys literally snapping on so level to see him like this. Kellen would have comforted him no matter what. He was his pair, and he wanted Rhys to feel safe with him.

"Rhys, you have years on when it cos to being an Esper. You’re also just...older than . There are going to be aspects of your life that I’m just...there is no reason to get upset about. You have more sexual experience than , and you’ve had more partners just because of your powers alone. Yes, there might be sotis when it stings, but I think that might co from my own insecurities. Now, I won’t really like it if so of the people who helped you tried to rub it in my face, or like the Manager of Guiding Center A tries to shove another Guide into your arms while I’m literally right fucking next to you, but that’s current things. I don’t care-mm, that’s not quite right. I do care, but not in the way you’re worrying about." Kellen bent, pressing his lips against Rhys’.

Rhys stared at him, his yellow eyes wide, his breath a little ragged, and Kellen knew that Rhys cared for him deeply.

"I’m sorry. I’m just so worried about everything. I’m still shaking. This isn’t very strong Esper of , is it?" Kellen felt himself frown, before he sighed and pulled Rhys against his chest.

"Fuck. Rhys, I don’t expect you to always be like that. I would argue that I wasn’t very Field Guide today if that’s where your brain is going right now. Hell, I felt very weak today. Or, yesterday. Whatever. It doesn’t matter, I just want to tell you I don’t care if you show these sides of you. I like it. It makes feel like we’re going close as a pair. Am I happy it’s because you thought I wasn’t breathing? No, but I’m happy you’re letting comfort you through it." Rhys buried his face into Kellen’s stomach, his face dangerously close to Kellen’s crotch, but he didn’t care as Rhys squeezed him.

"I love you." Rhys mumbled against his skin, before he froze. He jerked back, his face distraught. "You didn’t hear that! I-I didn’t say that! Forget I said it!" Kellen, shocked at his sudden movent, blinked several tis.

"What? Why?" Kellen asked and Rhys flushed.

"I-I was planning to take you out to dinner and tell you. Not like this. Never like this." Rhys mumbled and Kellen covered his mouth, hiding his smile as a warm, tingling feeling filled his body and he started shaking. Rhys panicked until Kellen started laughing.

"I’m not letting you take it back. It’s mine now." Rhys looked inconsolable.

"No! I wanted it to be romantic! This is the worst ti I could have said it!" He protested and Kellen continued to laugh. Still laughing, he kissed Rhys several tis, silencing the man when he was about to go on another rambling rant.

"Rhys, I love you too." Kellen told him, grinning, and Rhys froze. His body stilled, before he pouted. He looked away from Kellen, before glancing back at him and pressing a kiss against his lips.

"I guess...this is okay." He mumbled and Kellen laughed harder.

He was never going to let this man live this mont down.