"This is fun, isn’t it?" Brent asked, his eyes sparkling as he pulled off his Guild uniform. It was just the two of them in the changing room at the mont, since the others involved in the shoot had already changed. Kellen looked over at the man who was loving every second. Kellen would be the first to admit that he wasn’t feeling the sa.
He felt like an object, like sothing to gawk at. Especially after he had seen the photos that he had taken with the Captain.
"Hey, I brought both of my jackets, which one do you think I should wear?" Brent asked, turning to Kellen who seed to be deep in thought. Kellen humd for a mont, before he sighed. It was an official photo shoot, even if he hated it, and the long jacket was the official jacket for the outfit, since it had built in pockets the whole length.
"Probably the long one." Kellen told him begrudgingly, and Brent nodded. He too, hated the long jacket, but agreed with Kellen’s opinion. He just wanted soone else to say it, and not him. With the short jackets, when they were on the front lines they blended in a little bit with the other Espers and Guides there. When they wore their long jackets? Kellen felt like they should be monologuing about how sinister the world truly was. Or sothing like that.
Brent tossed his Guild uniform on the floor, just like his previous outfit, and began to pull on his Field Guide uniform. Since they were alone now, Kellen picked up his clothes off of the floor and began folding them, and could tell Brent was smirking out of the corner of his eye. He rolled his own, ignoring him. It was not his fault that he couldn’t handle how dirty the man made the place. What if soone tripped? He would be held accountable.
"You shouldn’t have turned down their help if you were going to clean up after ." Brent said, and Kellen ignored him. After the two of them had left to do as Pala ordered, a few of the assistants had co over and asked if they needed any help getting ready. Kellen knew they were really asking for Brent, but Kellen had turned them down.
Brent had pouted at first, but he easily laughed it off and blew kisses at the assistants as the two of them had left. Kellen sighed, finishing hanging up the man’s Guide jacket. Honestly he just wanted so ti for them, without having everyone’s eyes on them.
"To answer your earlier question, I guess it’s fun. I just...I feel like an object with everyone staring at ." Kellen admitted and Brent laughed, slapping his shoulder with his hand. Kellen realised that he was basically fully dressed already, and hustled into getting dressed. Brent hadn’t pulled on the long overcoat yet, since it did make the outfit feel...a lot.
"Ah, you’ll get used to it. It’s enjoyable for others to look at you with desire, plus, aren’t you happy that you get to be pressed against Captain Thatcher? It’s been forever since you two got to do that in public since he’s been so busy. He hasn’t been able to go on the ’everyone knows I love Kellen’ campaign around the Guild recently. Honestly, I kind of missed it." It’d also been forever since they had done it in private too. Kellen honestly had worried that he had forgotten how the Captain’s touch felt until the photo shoot.
Kellen felt his cheeks heat and he looked away from Brent. He started pulling off his own Guild uniform, before beginning to pull on his Field Guide uniform. Brent had been clearly trying to get a rise out of him, but when he didn’t deny it, Brent’s smile dropped from his face and he got quiet. He watched Kellen, half expecting him to make a comnt on it, and he didn’t.
"Wait. Wait wait wait. What’s going on here? The Kellen I know would have denied that almost imdiately. What’s going on?" He demanded, and before Kellen could get a word in, he spoke again. "Wait, are you upset that the Captain is touching you? Did sothing happen? I noticed that you two didn’t greet each other when we ca in, but is it sothing more serious? Co on, you haven’t been talking lately, especially not about Captain Thatcher. What’s going on? Are you happy?" Kellen felt overwheld by his words, and his hands stopped moving for a mont. He looked at Brent, before looking away again.
"I-It’s nothing like that. It’s just...It just feels weird to have him touch or for to touch him since he’s been so busy and we haven’t had ti to hang out." Kellen spoke softly, his fingers beginning to move again, He reached for the leather straps once he had both of his tops on. Brent’s expression didn’t soften, and instead it seed that he got serious.
"Then, if you aren’t upset, and nothing is wrong, you should enjoy the ti you have right now. Especially if you two haven’t been able to hang out. Take advantage of the fact that the girls want you to have your hands all over each other." Kellen nodded, but didn’t say anything. Brent kept watching Kellen, his expression serious. Then, a light went off, and he softly gasped. "You can’t honestly believe that Captain Thatcher has been avoiding you on purpose, right? You aren’t foolish enough to think that, right?" His tone held a slight tinge of desperation to it. Kellen paused again, but this ti it was in shock.
He had no idea that he felt that way, until Brent said exactly that. He had no idea how the man was able to pinpoint his exact fears every ti when it ca to personal relationships, but here they were. He had given one of the concerns Kellen had a na, and a face. Kellen blinked.
"Oh god, I think I have been." Kellen told him, and Brent groaned. He dramatically collapsed into a small chair covered in clothes that had been discarded there.
"Kellen Woods! There is no way on this whole planet that that man would ever avoid you if he wasn’t incredibly busy. We all have been!" Kellen nodded in agreent to his quietly yelled words, adjusting the straps of leather crossing his body.
"I know that. We’ve all been busy. That might be why I didn’t know exactly what I was feeling until you said it. I didn’t want to make anyone feel bad." Brent stared at the man who had never been in a relationship before in his life. He hadn’t even done intimate guiding with anyone either, and had a hard ti understanding when people were being friendly to him, or making fun of him. But only when it ca to him personally. He got up from his chair, and poked the man on the nose.
"It isn’t anyone, Kellen, it’s Captain Thatcher you didn’t want to make feel bad. Or inconvenience." Kellen’s face flushed as Brent hit it on the head again. Brent stared at his face for a mont before shaking his head with a sigh. "What the hell am I going to do with you? It’s like every step you take forward you want to slide back. It’s fine to be possessive of him through your actions and looks, but you need to express that with your words too, Kellen. The man might think you aren’t as interested in him as he is in you." Kellen felt his eyebrows furrow in confusion as Brent grabbed his jacket, and headed for the door. "Take so ti to think, and et outside when you’re ready." He told him, and Kellen nodded.
Left alone, Kellen made quick work of the rest of his uniform, before grabbing his own trench coat. He paused, halfway to the door when he let Brent’s words wash over him. The Captain might think that he didn’t care for him the sa way he cared for him? That was a given, since the Captain had made it clear that he wanted sothing more with Kellen, which Kellen couldn’t give him. Or...or did he still want that?
They hadn’t discussed it in a while, and if Kellen was honest, none of his current behaviour in the last two weeks had been anything similar to how they had been before the second press conference. In fact, they hadn’t done anything besides being cordial to each other in public. Yes, they were ssaging each other, but even Kellen could tell they were dry ssages. The Captain didn’t use emojis, and neither did Kellen.
What if...Kellen had been going about this all wrong? What if Brent was wrong, and the Captain had gotten tired of Kellen playing so hard to get, and just hadn’t had ti to tell him about it? It wasn’t...wrong of him to think that way either, since Kellen had been...maybe neglecting the Captain? In fact, Kellen could say that the way the two currently treated each other wasn’t that different from how they behaved on the front lines. They only saw each other for guiding sessions, and then the Captain would run away. They barely had ti to chat.
No. No no no. You are not allowed to go down a rabbit hole. It’s not important right now. If the Captain had sothing like that to say to you, he would have said it. He’s not that kind of man. Do not speak badly of him, when you don’t know the situation.
Kellen told himself that as he opened the door, even if his heart ached in his chest as the thought of another touching the Captain after him filled his mind.
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