Apocalypse: The Dead Lives Chapter 61: Whatever You Want

RONAN

I knew sothing was off the second I saw Hailey this morning.

She wasn’t avoiding exactly, but she wasn’t looking at either. Not in the way that she used to. I told myself I didn’t care. That I broke up with her for a reason. That it was the right thing to do.

Then I heard August talking.

"Yeah, I saw them," he said casually, stretching his arms over his head. "She was crying, and then she just- kissed him."

I hadn’t ant to eavesdrop, but the words hit like a punch to the gut. I froze in place, my heart hamring against my ribs.

"Wait- Hailey kissed Marco?" Oliver sounded just as surprised as I felt.

August nodded. "Out of nowhere. I don’t know what it was about, but she left right after. Marco looked..." He hesitated. "Confused."

Confused.

I clenched my jaw so hard it ached.

I should have walked away. I shouldn’t have cared.

But I did.

I turned on my heel and walked straight to the training grounds.

I trained for hours.

The others were outside, cleaning up after the battle, but I stayed inside, slamming my fists into the worn-out punching bag over and over again. My knuckles throbbed, but I didn’t stop.

Hailey kissed Marco.

I hated how the words echoed in my head. I hated how my stomach twisted at the thought of it.

What the hell was she thinking?

I broke up with her, but that didn’t an she could just run to soone else.

I know Marco likes her. Everyone knows Marco likes her. He even confessed his- feelings to her.

And now she kissed him?

I hit the bag harder.

I was fine with losing her. It was better this way. I didn’t need her.

But if that was true, why did it feel like my entire body was on fire?

"Ronan."

I turned at the sound of my na.

Marco stood in the doorway, arms crossed, his expression unreadable.

I wiped the sweat from my forehead. "What do you want?"

He stepped inside, closing the door behind him. "We need to talk."

I scoffed. "We have nothing to talk about."

Marco exhaled, shaking his head. "You’re pissed."

"No shit."

His jaw tightened. "It wasn’t like that."

I laughed coldly. "Oh, so she accidentally kissed you?"

"She was hurting," he snapped. "You broke up with her. She was crying. I was just trying to-"

"To what?" I cut him off, stepping closer. "Be there for her? Comfort her?" My voice dripped with sarcasm. "What’s next? You gonna tell it didn’t an anything?"

Marco didn’t back down. He never did.

"She was hurting," he repeated. "And you don’t get to be mad about that, Ronan. You left her."

His words hit like a ton of bricks.

I knew he was right.

I was the one who walked away.

But that didn’t an it didn’t hurt. That didn’t an I wanted to see her with him.

I let out a humorless laugh. "You know what, Marco? Fine. Take her. If you think you can handle her, be my guest."

Sothing flickered across his face- anger, maybe. Or sothing else.

"I don’t need your permission," he said simply.

That pissed off more than anything.

I turned back to the punching bag, slamming my fist into it so hard my knuckles cracked. Marco watched for a mont before sighing.

"You can keep punching things all you want," he muttered. "But it won’t change anything."

Then he walked out.

I let out a slow, shaky breath.

Fuck him. Fuck Love. Fuck everything.

I won’t go looking for her.

I told myself I wouldn’t.

But my body had other plans.

●●●

I found her alone, sitting on the edge of the rooftop, staring at the darkening sky.

She looked... tired.

Her shoulders were slumped, her hands clasped together in her lap. The usual fire in her eyes was gone.

For a second, I almost turned around. But sothing about the way she sat there, so small, made pause.

Before I knew it, I was stepping forward.

She heard .

"I don’t want to talk right now," she said, voice quiet.

"Hectic," I replied. "But we’re already talking, princess."

She sighed but didn’t move. I sat down next to her, leaving just enough space between us.

Silence stretched between us.

I didn’t know what I wanted to say.

I just knew I couldn’t walk away.

Finally, Hailey spoke. "I kissed Marco."

I clenched my fists. "I know."

She turned to look at . "And?"

I forced myself to et her gaze. "And nothing. Do whatever you want."

Her lips pressed together, eyes searching mine like she was looking for sothing. I wouldn’t let her find it.

She looked away. "It didn’t an anything."

Sothing inside unraveled at those words. But I didn’t let it show.

"Then why did you do it?"

She exhaled shakily. "Because I wanted to feel sothing."

I swallowed hard. I knew that feeling. That emptiness.

But hearing her say it still made my chest ache.

I hesitated before asking, "Did it work?"

She shook her head. "No."

We sat in silence again.

For the first ti in a long ti, I didn’t know what to say.

I should have told her it was for the best. That moving on was good for her.

Instead, I found myself saying, "I don’t want you with him."

Her breath hitched. "Then why did you push away?"

I ran a hand through my hair. "Because I’m bad for you."

She let out a bitter laugh. "And you think Marco’s good for ?"

"No," I admitted. "But at least he’s not ."

She turned to again, sothing unreadable in her eyes. "I don’t want him."

I didn’t let myself react.

She sighed, shaking her head. "I don’t even know what I want anymore."

I did.

I wanted to pull her close. I wanted to tell her I was sorry. I wanted to take it all back.

But I couldn’t.

I stood up instead.

"You should get so rest," I muttered. "Long day tomorrow."

She didn’t say anything as I walked away.

But just before I disappeared down the stairs, I heard her whisper.

"Neither of us are good for each other, Ronan."

I clenched my jaw.

She was right.

And yet, I still couldn’t walk away from her. From us. Not completely.