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Chapter 125: Can’t Find Joy

It was Friday morning and Emily walked through the city streets.

Headphones in her ears as she listened to an upbeat song. The happy tune was an attempt to cheer herself up after another disappointing night. The source of her disappointnt being that Derek Haven had not shown up once again.

It was not working. In fact, it was failing dismally. Emily could not seem to get her mood out of the dark place that it was in, no matter how hard she tried. Not even the current song that she was listening to helped. It was one about sunshine, rainbows, and all things good, but it was not enough to cheer her up. On the surface she might have looked passive, but internally her mind was at war.

He does not owe you anything. A part of her hissed. He was just a client at the diner, it said.

But the other part of her disagreed? Yes, he does. He owes

an apology. I need to confront him and talk about it.

And that was where the problem was. She could not confront soone who was not there. She could call him since she had his number, but Emily highly doubted that he would pick up.

Afterall, he had no reason that would make him answer a call from her. Just as he had no reason to keep coming back to the diner.

Which was why it had been so easy for him to stop. To just abandon everything without warning. Leaving her blaming herself for the unfinished business that she had with him.

She should have confronted him way before he up and left for good. But Emily, ever the mother hen had just taken one look at him. She had seen the too loose suit, that awful beard, and the lines under his eyes. And she had instantly gone into nurturing mode. Then she had nurtured him right out of her life.

Just when it looked like he was gaining a bit of vitality back. He had disappeared.

And part of her truly believed that it was what she deserved. She’d had a chance to get her closure. And she had wasted it, making sure that a man who was her forr boss was back to looking like the person that she rembered, instead of just a shadow of his forr self.

An absolute waste of a good opportunity.

And now she would never get the chance to confront him because he was not coming back. But even as she told herself that, told herself to abandon all hope. Emily knew that, that night, when she was back at work, nothing would changed. She would be back to her old ways, looking outside the diner as she did her job. Hoping that he would co in. Setting herself up for what would no doubt be another disappointnt, while at the sa ti unable to stop herself from believing that the outco would be different.

It was a vicious cycle. One that Emily had fallen into by mistake and wished with everything in her heart that she could end. But she had no idea how. And it seed as though she was dood to repeat it. Night after night.

Turning off the music, as she prepared to cross the road. Emily thought so more on the situation.

What she was doing was avoidance, plain and simple. She knew where Derek worked. And she also had his number.

She could just contact him anyti and face the issue head on. But in her own way she was stalling again.

She wanted him to be the one to co to her. Emily knew that, that might sound ridiculous to so. But when she had been his PA. It had been her job to run after him. But now he was the one who owed her an apology. So he was the one who should co to her. Even if she had to be the one to bring the topic up. He still had to et her halfway. It was a ssed up view. But it was how she saw things.

Did that make her a fool?

Waiting for a man to co through the door so that she could demand an apology from him, or was it Derek who was the fool? Afterall, he was the one who had kept coming back to the diner. Willingly subjecting himself to being in the presence of his forr PA when they no longer had anything binding them together. He should have walked right out the first night that he ca in. But he had kept returning.

That ant sothing. But Emily had no idea what all that was. She just knew was that she was owed an apology by Derek Haven. An apology

knew that she would most likely never get because it seed that Derek Haven was done with seeing her.

He had moved on, clearly he had been coming to the diner to get her out of his system or whatever it was that he had been doing. But now that it was done, he was not coming back and he had returned to his super stellar world, where he was the all powerful CEO of Haven Group.

At the end of the day, that was all it was. They were two people from two different worlds. In his world, he was a CEO. And all she had been as his PA, was a visitor in that world. And now she was back in her own world that suited her better. Back in the lane where the poor people walked, far from the rich and powerful.

With such gloomy thoughts in her mind, Emily’s mood soured. The rest of her trip back ho was a depressing one. And by the ti she opened the door to her apartnt building, she could not wait.

She just threw herself onto the bed. Even if she most likely would barely make it past an hour of sleep. Emily was still grateful for it, for at least in that small amount of ti, that she would be sleeping. She would not have to think about the disappointnt that her life had beco.

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