On the subject of paganism, I find myself unable to expand the discussion further with my limited capabilities, so I move on to the next group, the monastery.
The Monastery.
A place where life is centered around faith in God, prayer, labor, poverty, chastity, and precepts. Apart from these precepts, there exists a vows specific to this Stonehurst Monastery.
Suddenly, I recall the conversation I overheard between Father Benedict and Sauls in the library one night.
“…We have a vows. It cannot be broken.”
“What worth is such a vows!”
Presumably, ‘we’… that is, all the priests living in the monastery, are living by this vows. It seems to be sothing entirely separate from Christianity.
Otherwise, Sauls, a firm believer in Christian precepts, would not suggest to Benedict that the vows should be disregarded and broken.
To begin with, if it’s not related to Christianity, why must Stonehurst Monastery uphold this vows? Christianity, exclusive and intolerant, does not acknowledge anything else.
They have co down with an iron fist through invasion and conquest. They must be well aware of that.
I scrape the right side of the wax with the belly of my stylus, writing new letters.
The vows is sothing to be upheld.The vows is sothing to be broken.The vows is unrelated to Christian precepts.The vows exists to protect a secret.
I wrack my brain.
I don’t understand.
What is the monastery hiding?
What is the secret?
The more I think, the more muddled my thoughts beco.
What on earth is happening in this place, sealed off from the outside?
(Hmm. Sealed off from the outside, huh…)
The monastery is a place isolated from the secular world. A large property surrounded by stone walls, creating a boundary. A small world where only the permitted can enter, and that’s where we live.
Co to think of it, Amal once described this monastery as sothing akin to a prison.
A prison, like the monastery, is a place separated from the secular world, but it is ant to keep those inside from leaving.
“A prison to prevent leaving… a monastery to prevent leaving.”
And a prison needs criminals. Are they what Father Benedict feared? The source of the secret protected by the vows?
(…Well, that’s probably too far-fetched.)
Now, let’s refocus and think about matters related to the king.
On this matter, Katy had told
that the king had passed away, and the power balance between the monarchy and the church had beco skewed. Sauls also said this about the king:
“What worth is such a vows! Now that the king has passed, it has no power.”
“It is only now, having lost the king’s protection, that we can do what must be done. What belongs to Caesar is Caesar’s, what belongs to God is God’s. We need only move accordingly.”
What becos clear from this is that the king and the vows are deeply connected.
And that this monastery had received so form of protection from the king, be it a person or an object. And now, with the king gone, that protection is no longer available.
I write ‘king’ and ‘vows’ on the wax tablet and add arrows between them.
Below the king, I spell out Amal’s na. I draw a large circle around Amal, writing ‘monastery’ inside it. Along the outside of the circle, I draw another circle, writing ‘otherworld’ inside it.
Finally, Amalthea.
A girl whose na is never called. A presence so unacknowledged that it has a reason not to be expelled from the monastery.
If we assu that she was under the king’s protection, then what is her relationship with the king? Why did the king need to protect Amal?
I secretly thought the reason Amal called herself an abominable child was because she might be an albino. In fact, I’ve thought she might be albino ever since we t.
She always wears a hood and avoids the sunlight, perhaps due to that. And because of her albinism, she might have been persecuted and isolated deep within the monastery.
It’s a plausible story.
But, it’s probably not just that.
Paganism, the monastery, the king, and Amal.
Each is not independent; they are all interconnected and relate to one another. And behind that, is there a past of the monastery that Johanna wanted to tell?
Although I’ve organized my thoughts, I still can’t co to a conclusion.
I look up at the sky again.
The thick, gray clouds still cover the sky.
It was as if they were a representation of my inner turmoil.
TLN : bonus chapter for today because its Christmas Day. Thanks a lot everyone for the support. please keep supporting
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