I ascended the stairs of the pilgrimage tower.
The inorganic sound of my steps on the stone floor oddly lingered in my ears.
*sigh* A sigh escaped . And then, I felt an indescribable mood co over
for having sighed in the first place. Still, I did not stop my steps. No, it would be more appropriate to say that I couldn’t stop.
My legs were heavy. Incredibly heavy. With each step, another slow step, I moved forward sluggishly. This wasn’t the heaviness that cos from chronic fatigue. It was purely psychological.
“…Ah, how depressing.”
That single phrase sumd it all up.
Trying to calm myself, I took a deep breath. Damp, dusty air rushed into my lungs, causing
to cough.
“*cough* *wheeze* *cough*… *phew*, ha, *cough*, Damn it!”
Reflexively, I wiped away the tears that had ford and cursed at myself. The feeble gasps seed to be swallowed up by the stone walls and disappear. I placed a hand over my left chest, squeezing my heart through my clothes. The pounding heartbeat seed to highlight my own foolishness. It made
feel even more miserable. I was truly glad that no one was watching. If soone had seen , I would have died of sha.
This ti, I took shallower breaths to avoid another coughing fit and then continued up the stairs. Looking up, I could see the evening sun streaming through a window. Night was approaching.
—Night is coming.
A world dyed in the red-black of spilled blood.
My heart danced with glee, *thump-thump*.
Ah, how delightful. This is fun.
Co here, sothing beckoned with an outstretched hand. Drawn to it, I reached out towards the twilight. I simply wanted to
“Co,” sothing beckoned, extending a hand. I was lured in, reaching out into the twilight. I simply desired to see what was beyond. It was an emotion as innocent as a child before a toy, almost enviable in its purity.
Was it the right action to take? I no longer knew. Nor did I wish to know. Even if I understood, it was clear that it wouldn’t result in anything worthwhile. Satisfaction might co from knowing everything, but not happiness.
Not knowing ant not having to bear unnecessary burdens. That’s why I had always acted this way, both now and in the past. Even though I wished to know, I never made the effort to actually learn. I wanted to live unburdened, always looking for an escape route.
Even if I took a step forward, I didn’t progress. I stood in the sa place. Over a year and a half had passed since I ca to Stonehurst, and my inability to find answers was simply because I desired it to be so.
As if affirming my decision, a flickering shadow writhed and sneered.
—Clang.
A dry sound rang out.
(…Wait, what was I just thinking about?)
Coming back to myself and looking up, I was faced with an old wooden door. Before I knew it, I had arrived at my intended destination.
I slapped my cheeks lightly, braced myself, and knocked several tis. After a mont, a feeble voice from beyond the door barely audible, invited
in.
“Pardon my intrusion.”
With those words, I opened the door and entered. My gaze then found the woman sitting on the bed.
“Andrew, you’ve co to visit today as well.”
“Of course. After all, Sofia-san, you can’t sleep without , can you?”
“That’s right. I’m sorry to trouble you.”
“No, it’s fine. We should help each other out in tis of need.”
“…Yes, thank you.”
At my words, Sofia-san gave a faint smile. Seeing her apologetic expression made
feel an imnse sense of guilt.
You’ve got it wrong, Sofia-san. It’s not that I dislike eting with you. I don’t find it botherso. It’s just that I feel gloomy about the interactions with Amal that follow after this is over.
After eting with Sofia-san, I return to my room and invariably encounter a jealous Amal, who then sulks in a yandere state. It’s a serious effort to improve her mood. It’s beco a daily routine, and frankly, it’s exhausting.
Amal is a woman of deep sentint. The trouble is that her affection is directed solely at . Her love is an abyss—endless, falling deeper and deeper.
I scratched my head, trying to redirect my thoughts.
“Sofia-san, are you feeling alright?”
“Yes, because you, Andrew-sama, are here with , I am fine.”
“That’s good to hear. Still, don’t overdo it. Lie down, and I’ll stay by your side until you fall asleep, as usual.”
“Yes…”
I gently pushed Sofia-san’s shoulder, and she lay down on the bed without resistance. Her soft chestnut hair spread out on the pillow. I brushed the hair off her face and covered her slender body with the blanket.
“Sofia-san, are you cold?”
She nodded slightly.
Her drooping eyes stared vacantly at the ceiling. She seed to be quickly succumbing to sleep.
“Andrew-sama… Oh, could you… hold my hand, please?”
I took her slender, small hand that was offered to . Sofia-san’s lips relaxed into a gentle hue of peach, an expression of complete tranquility and vulnerability.
“Andrew-sama?”
“Mhm.”
“Please, hold on to it forever.”
“Of course. I will hold it until you fall asleep, Sofia-san.”
“I’m scared. When you’re not here, Andrew-sama, I have scary dreams.”
“Scary dreams?”
“Yes, very, very frightening dreams…”
“Sofia-san?”
“Andrew-sama… it’s scary.”
Saying so, Sofia-san pulled on my hand. Caught off guard, I couldn’t resist and fell on top of her. I tried to get up, but she held
with a surprising strength. Sothing was off.
“Sofia-san, let go of . What’s happening?”
“I am , and yet… it’s different. It’s coming in. Trying to look. It’s scary. Being watched, heard, spoken to. I am… I am… Oh, you, you are… Can’t you see… who are you…to ?”
My voice didn’t reach her.
It was just a monologue, no, more likely sleep talking. I tried to wriggle free, but Sofia-san wouldn’t allow it.
“Sophia…nnn!?”
She forcibly pulled my face closer to her and captured my lips, biting. I can’t move. Her tongue invades my mouth and tramples . A sticky, lewd sound filled my ears.
I couldn’t tell how long the kiss lasted. Before I realized it, the day had ended and the room was enveloped in darkness.
“Calix Dea.”
Within my hazy consciousness, I heard soone’s voice.
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