Chapter 192: I’ve Learnt My Lesson
"What did you just say?" It is most likely I didn’t hear him well. Have I started hallucinating?
The proud Shawn who valued his image more than anything in the world was ready to take in children that he knew nothing about and might probably hate? This is unbelievable.
"I said what you just heard, Kathleen and I an it from the depth of my heart. If getting you by my side will require
to take in the children, I am willing to do so. I love you Kathleen and I can’t live without you."
Staring deep into Kathleen’s purple orb which held an uncanny guardedness against him, he wanted her to see that what he was saying originated from the depths of his soul and not just lip service.
The more he looked at her the more convinced he was that he was doing the right thing. Maybe this would move her heart to forgive him.
That was the biggest sacrifice he could make for the woman he loved. All he hoped and wished for was a second chance.
"I’m willing to take in your kids as my own. We can make this work together," Shawn reiterated as he saw the doubt written all over Kathleen’s face in capital letters.
After so ti, Kathleen released a long deep breath and said gently but firmly,
"Shawn, that’s... a generous offer, and I appreciate your willingness to help," Kathleen said sympathetically.
"But this isn’t sothing I can accept. Their father may not be present, but they need stability and consistency. I can’t risk unsettling their lives further."
A fuse went off in Shawn’s head as he was struck with the biggest shock of his life.
’Did she just refuse him? Was she out of her mind? Which sane woman would resist such an offer. Bringing in soone else’s child, two at that, to live with her husband?’
’How dare she reject his offer after presenting it so nicely and appealingly.
He was at the verge of releasing a barrage of accusations and taunting remarks but he stopped himself just in ti.
With every strength in him, he willed himself not to yield to the force that was urging him to strike out.
’This will lead you nowhere,’ another force seed to whisper in his ears.
’Rember you have been doing so retrospection lately and have resolved not to ever blow up, no matter the provocation.
Don’t forget the goal is to get her forgiveness, restore her trust and win her heart,’ the voice finished.
He didn’t know how long it took but he was able to get a grip on his emotions.
Also co to think of it, the Kathleen that returned a few months back now specializes in irrational things. Take for instance her approach to Spider’s case and her blatant disregard for his sufferings and the heartless blows she’s been dealing him.
With this he also realized that his journey was still very far and without further ado, he tried again.
"I want to be there for you, for them. I know I’m not their father, but I can be there for them, support them, love them like my own," he insisted, his expression pleading and determined.
Kathleen’s heart softened at his sincerity, but she remained resolute.
"But it’s not that simple. My children are not a charity venture, I don’t want them in a loveless ho, where they won’t be able to express themselves and feel loved."
"Besides involving you in their lives in such a way... it’s not fair to any of us. They are my responsibility and I can take care of them myself."
Shawn’s shoulders slumped slightly, disappointed as he finally realized the boundary Kathleen had set between them, but he was determined to break that barrier.
Moreover he had made a promise to Director Wyatt and Jason which he must accomplish even before the stipulated ti fra.
"I will try to love them, Kathleen, since they are your children. All I ask is that you give
a chance."
Kathleen sighed. It’s like he was not getting her point. "Shawn, this is not just about love and giving you a chance. It’s about respect. The sa respect that you have trampled on over and over again."
Kathleen felt a mix of irritation and a hint of flustered surprise at Shawn’s unwavering attempts to win her over despite her constant rejection.
"I have learnt my lesson and from now on, will only respect you no matter what you do as long as you don’t alienate
from your life."
"Really?" Kathleen was not deceived by his eloquence. After what she had seen on the few occasions they had disagreed, she wasn’t convinced and decided to call it a day.
She crossed her arms across her chest and at the sa ti gave Shawn a skeptical look. "So can you let
go now?"
"But I just said that was not part of the deal."
"I’m late for my appointnt Shawn," she snapped. "I need to go."
Although she knew Shawn had taken it the other way, she wasn’t going to bother about him misunderstanding her or not.
"Oh that. Yes you can. When can I see you again?"
"Whenever I am willing to see you," Kathleen said and walked to her car.
Shawn wanted to stop her but restrained himself.
"I need to get a hold on myself and see my psychiatrist if he can prescribe a pill for long suffering and endurance for . That is, if sothing like that existed."
Taking a look at his watch on his wrist, he saw that he still had ti to deal with so matters.
He pulled his phone and dialed a number.
The person on the other side picked the call but said nothing.
"If you still need to walk freely in Baltimore, et
at Demon’s Skull in the next one hour.
Without waiting for the response from the person he had spoken with, he ended the call and drove off in his car.
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