Chapter 873: Chapter 873: The Strongest Troublemaker Organization in History, and Go Be Narcissistic, Girl!
This evening, just as it was getting dark, our family held an informal mock trial. The star of the trial was our one-ter-nine clever and cute Lilina—of course, that’s what she calls herself. And presiding over the trial was our wise, mighty, and benevolent national leader—of course, that’s what I call myself.
The the of the trial was whether a certain irresponsible little girl, who has a habit of spurting nonsense and causing trouble, should be punished with a week of salted cabbage and pancakes.
Lilina sat obediently on a small stool, looking down at her toes like a wronged little wife. If she had a handkerchief, she could play the part of a poor maid sold into a rich family in a lodrama, constantly beaten and scolded. Sitting around her in a semicircle, my Big Sister and I, along with other family mbers, were giving this mischievous girl a full-on lesson in character education.
The little ones, seeing it had nothing to do with them, were running wild in the living room. Little Baobao was chasing the Nine-tailed Fox onto the top of the cabinet with a can of hairspray. At the other end of the cabinet, Anwina clung tearfully to her crow’s nest, afraid that the fox’s bushy tails might accidentally swipe her nest off. Visca was trying to poke both the crow and the fox down with a long bamboo pole. Little Qijing sohow procured a Magic Mirror we got from the Frozen Continent of the Divine Realm and was busy asking it a hundred thousand whys, driving the mirror nearly crazy.
Unlike usual, rcury Lamp wasn’t horsing around with the little ones. She was sitting nearby with her cherished yogurt bottle, chuckling as she watched Lilina being trained, all the while oblivious to the fact that her yogurt had been sneakily swapped for rice milk by Lilina…
As ever, the house was lively, but Lilina, unable to fool around like normal, was under imnse pressure—after parental deliberation, the number of words she had to write for her reflection was soon to break the ten-thousand mark.
And next week, she might even face the extre punishnt of salted cabbage and pancakes. Back in the day, even the likes of Ji Shanshan, who were immune to blandishnts, had succumbed to this tactic.
Actually, the mistake Lilina made wasn’t just one careless sentence today that led to the Dragon Constellation’s destruction by the fleet. We were mainly totaling up her streak of mischievous antics, starting from the mont she recklessly appeared in front of the Moon Car, to her spreading various heresies through the Boundless Love website, and tricking Earth’s best experts and scholars for her unspeakable desires. Should the whole of humanity find out, we’d likely see her executed on an international tribunal for a good forty to fifty minutes, no crying allowed. Of course, humanity isn’t authorized to judge her, and we’ve indulged this girl in her string of actions. But now that it’s mostly settled, so education is necessary.
She needs to understand that in the future, she must take responsibility for similar actions. For instance, the unfortunate Dragon Constellation—so that when humanity, in a few centuries, develops superluminal observational technology, they won’t realize their first contact with aliens was a setup, Sandora decisively ordered the Revenge Fleet’s drill grounds to be relocated to the Dragon Constellation. In just over twenty hours, that place would be vaporized.
Of course, beyond all the righteous reasons ntioned, another key reason for the mock trial of Lilina is that I find it quite amusing. Is there anything wrong with ssing around with our own loli out of boredom?
“So, do you know your mistake now?”
Like every parent who feigns a kindly deanor while stealthily hiding a smile, after laying out the pitfalls of Lilina’s jumpy behavior, I patted the little girl’s head with a smile and said gently.
Apparently, despite having the soul of a mature woman, Lilina was accustod to living as a loli. Instinctively, she shook her head and humd, only to suddenly realize and quickly nodded: “Yes, I know my mistake, I won’t play like that anymore.”
“What was your main mistake this ti?” Qianqian tried her best to maintain a stern face, putting on a teacher-like façade, recalling how the person on the opposite end of her scolding looked six years ago when the teacher had reprimanded her, and tried to imitate it—despite ordinarily being a more troubleso troublemaker than Lilina. Additionally, I doubt she even knew Lilina’s main mistake; Qianqian was purely here to join the fun.
“I shouldn’t joke around with the whole world. I need to take responsibility for my words, and I can’t disrupt the developnt of civilization arbitrarily…” Lilina recited each of her sins one by one on her fingers as told by my Big Sister and . These are areas where Lilina must be educated. She’s too used to not taking anything seriously; she even dares to joke about the developntal trajectory of an entire Race, and that requires education.
“And one more thing,” I tapped Lilina’s head again, pointing at the bottle in rcury Lamp’s hand, “you shouldn’t bully Little Light. What did you pour into her bottle?”
As soon as the words fell, rcury Lamp finally realized the taste was off, imdiately threw the bottle, and leaped to start tussling with Lilina.
This was where the mock trial basically ended. I clapped my hands, stood up, and was about to rescue the already-frizzed Yakumo Lan from Little Baobao’s antics, when Lin Xue nudged my arm, speaking softly: “Don’t overthink, it’s good for humanity.”
“I know, progress is always good. It’s just that Lilina’s character needs so discipline,” I replied, looking at Lilina with a headache as she rode on rcury Lamp’s back, frantically winding a brass key, causing the doll girl to scream, “Luckily, she didn’t blurt out that she was from the Big Bear Constellation to conquer Earth. Otherwise, there’d be world war by now, and Sandora would probably eat Lilina alive if Shaxian snacks shut down.”
Lin Xue looked speechlessly at : “Do you ever know when to stop talking?”
“Alright, alright, I’m just used to it… Anyway, you know what I’m trying to say. Lilina, this girl, can’t be left unchecked. She’s too dangerous for ordinary people.”
“At least she’s much better than when she first ca here,” Lin Xue said lightly, “Don’t worry, I’m watching her, she won’t cause any major trouble—which I’m sure you planned on doing anyway?”
I chuckled, about to respond, but then heard a sudden “wow” not far off, as Yakumo Lan grandly plumted to the floor: Visca finally succeeded in poking her down.
“Don’t get too wild!” I called out to the little ones going nuts near the ceiling on the other side of the living room. After confirming that Yakumo Lan didn’t need rescuing, I decisively gave Lilina a flick on the forehead, “Go write your reflection! Submit it next week!”
The little girl walked back to her room looking mournful.
At this ti, human scientists naturally had no idea that the “Moon Girl,” who was bringing about a revolutionary change in their worldview, was crying her eyes out, lying over a little desk writing a reflection. They were utterly imrsed in awe at the extraterrestrial life. After Lilina left those teorites, the energy fields on them had been completely cleared, allowing scholars to observe those life samples from another world safely under microscopes and various advanced equipnt, such as the paracium from Azeroth.
These little things, entirely different from Earth’s organisms, were a source of imnse joy. Their cells are quite similar to those on Earth, but they have many organelles in their cell fluid with functions humans can’t guess, adapted to another world’s energy environnt. On the second day of the teorite sample being cut and studied, scientists discovered another thing: a “natural energy collection organ” more efficient and powerful but seemingly unable to supply energy directly to organic life itself. These resilient cells could respond to electrical energy, thermal energy, magnetic energy, and even radiation energy. Thus, scientists were disappointed: all the biological tissues in the teorite samples had lost their activity, making it impossible to study them alive and understand the purpose of their baffling organelles. The only plausible hypothesis by the experts in extraterrestrial life sciences involved in the research is that the planets these cells ca from are teeming with lethal radiation, which might also explain the worldwide energy storm triggered after the crash of those giant “Arks” on the moon.
No one would associate these things with magic and elental energy. Although there are similar things on Earth, the way they operate is entirely different. Even if life from two worlds could learn each other’s skills, their inherent attributes would not be the sa. This is the difference between worlds. Moreover, where could a bunch of scientists understand arcane magic? Arcane math, maybe…
In the first few days, we were all interested in tracking and secretly… observing the work of Earth scientists, watching them almost sleeplessly study those green glowing stones. These dedicated researchers proposed countless hypotheses about extraterrestrial life forms and the cosmic ecological environnt. Due to limitations in understanding, these conjectures and assumptions might be overturned in a few decades. The ones that truly conform to reality so far are less than ten percent, yet for humanity’s exploration of cosmic life, which hasn’t progressed in years, it’s already an indescribably huge advancent.
Among the public, enthusiasm about the “moon” and “extraterrestrial life” has not waned over ti. Instead, it has increasingly soared and finally seems to be forming a series of complex long-term industries. For example, various thed websites, dia, and related industries under the banner of extraterrestrial life exploration have been springing up like mushrooms. These companies have developed rapidly, fully leveraging the novelty-seeking ntality of the public, and have cleverly fernted this montum until it is unstoppable. Perhaps so of these new companies will gradually decline as information flowing to the public dries up, but one third of them are destined to thrive because they’re truly backed by national machinery or research organizations.
Those big figures finally realized that this was a wave destined to sweep across every facet of society. No matter if they were politicians or civilians, they had the right to live in this great era of exploring the universe. So for the unprecedented first ti, governnts of various countries opened up their research findings about “extraterrestrial life”.
In fact, there was no choice but to open source because a mysterious organization would broadcast these research findings worldwide within thirty seconds of their discovery. This wretched organization is called Boundless Love, and they have a mysterious TV station called XLTV…
This behavior, beneficial to all humanity but not serving the private interests of certain countries, enraged many governnts, especially a country like the United States, which prides itself on high technology. They couldn’t tolerate their satellites being wantonly occupied by this ghost channel. The White House issued three sternly-worded but sowhat confusing to ordinary people “final warnings”, declaring that “so” organization was testing the limits of a terrorist’s standard line…
Lilina firmly counterattacked this. Her counterattack thod was to broadcast a selection of Phoenix Legend songs on average every thirty minutes on any electronic device in the United States that could make a sound, including the President’s phone and all the nuclear bases’ broadcasting systems.
According to reliable sources, after two days of such disturbances, every staff mber in the White House was walking in four-four ti. The Defense Minister and Foreign Minister t and exchanged phrases like secret codes; the Defense Minister would say one sentence of dicine, and the Foreign Minister would have to respond with check it out…
Facts proved that in terms of destructive power, a Lilina with fully activated dark elents could surpass twenty Bind Ladens banded together. After Big Sister and I issued a ban prohibiting Lilina from continuing to subvert the world with her dangerous “teaching” thoughts, that girl found another opportunity to channel her wild ideas, which was to prank certain national governnts trying to monopolize “extraterrestrial life” research findings, such as the United States, which always liked doing this. Rumors said her glorious counterattack resulted in over two hundred Arican high officials resigning. The White House tried to hoist the anti-terrorism banner in rage, only to face another round of suppression from Boundless Love, a suppression that’s typically Lilina-style and as crude as it gets: she severed all communication related to “terrorism” information, including wired phones and telegrams, within the United States. So from the White House to the Congress Building, as long as anyone ntioned “anti-terror” in conversation, all communication lines would filter out those words. This led to the President calling the Defense Minister twenty tis to discuss anti-terror matters, but every ti, after the call was connected, not a word could get through. The Defense Minister thought the President recently developed a bad taste, making prank calls that rang once and then hung up late at night—so you can say the U.S. Defense Minister has no insight. He’d be used to phone calls like this if he stayed in China for half a month.
In short, the Aricans, who always prided themselves on high tech, were totally outsmarted in the end. They finally realized sothing even weirder than stones on the moon hung over the United States. If they wanted to rally troops under its shadow to combat terrorism, the only viable communication thods might just be ssenger pigeons and beacon fires.
But the reality was even more amusing. After hearing my sigh, Lilina said with great admiration, “Even ssenger pigeons are no use; they’d probably get eaten by Sandora before flying twenty kiloters out.”
Thus, in such an increasingly bizarre atmosphere, the world welcod an era set to transform everything…
Then, there was nothing for us to do—nobody in this world could find out where Boundless Love was. Let the Aricans continue searching for their imagined terrorist organization because the real culprit behind all this—Lilina—has been chained up by and formally grounded.
Talking about Lilina, her mood hasn’t been very high these last two days. Usually, even when grounded, this girl would have a thirty-minute warm-up fight with rcury Lamp every morning after breakfast, then run around the house or frolic in the yard. But lately, she’s not doing that. After breakfast, she cozies up in her room, indifferent to rcury Lamp’s teasing, just browsing the internet with a lancholic look on her face.
Big Sister is sowhat worried about this, but Lilina isn’t the type to easily open up to others, not even family. So after a unanimous discussion at the Three Aunts and Six Aunties Promotion Association, Big Sister decided to send to probe the matter—to see if Lilina had eaten sothing that upset her stomach.
Though in my opinion, a troublemaker like Lilina seems like the sort who’d break the cycle of life for millennia, her negative attribute ensures she could thrive and revive in a post-apocalyptic world twelve thousand years from now and invent the next human civilization, but I couldn’t disobey Big Sister’s orders.
Upon entering Lilina’s room, decorated with strange plants and colored like a little girl’s chamber but with the aura of a haunted jungle, I found the little girl surfing the web. It was an English site displaying the latest progress of extraterrestrial life research—several enlarged Azeroth-originated cold viruses. At the top part of the webpage was the site’s overarching the: a little girl, floating mid-air, semi-transparent, and silly looking.
“Boss,” Lilina knew who walked in without turning around, waving her hand at , “this is so XX touching, deeply tugging at the heart of a tender maiden…”
I was greatly surprised, thinking, was Lilina’s two days of low spirits due to being lovesick in her room?
“Look at this,” Lilina pointed at a pile of English short sentences on the webpage for to see: “A poem dedicated to the Moon Girl—even though you’re gone, we’ll always rember you were here… Boohoo, I should have used my real na back then, and not let those Artemis steal the credit…”
: “…”
Had I known this girl had been holed up in her room being narcissistic for two days, why did I bother joining this excitent at all!
I knew right away what was going on just by hearing what Lilina said.
Due to widely known reasons, Boundless Love’s interference forced international transparency about the research conducted in the Pacific Ocean’s “God Factory.” Most occurrences in the laboratory were publicly broadcast online, with many secret experints being no exception, so those uninvolved with experint secrets were even more so.
For instance, Lilina reappearing as the interstellar ghost “Artemis” after the teorite samples arrived at the lab, and the scene where she “disappeared” after leaving a desolate “last words” due to “energy exhaustion.”
The already destroyed glorious civilization, a solitary life ark, the world’s last soul, the last words spoken before disappearing, “We just want you to rember, we existed…” and Lilina’s pretty and pitiable little face, all these together—you know how much infinite mourning they sparked among tragedy romanticists?
Anyway, Lilina holed in her room for two whole days, couldn’t even finish narcissistically indulging in all the online prose and poetry related to her…(To be continued. If you like this work, feel free to vote for recomndations and monthly tickets on Qidian (qidian). Your support is my biggest motivation.)
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