The blade pressed against his neck, Su Ming’an sat up straight. If Xue Qixia hadn’t retreated in ti, the blade would have pierced through Su Ming’an’s neck.
Xue Qixia widened his eyes, shocked by Su Ming’an’s reckless behavior.
... Has he really gone mad?
Xue Qixia had anticipated that with such an intense millennium plot, Su Ming’an’s ntal pressure would be enormous, almost driving him insane. The residual harm from the Holy Sword, the severe damages from ten major rollbacks, the overwhelming ntal strain from the rapidly flowing ti...
That dream was Su Ming’an’s subconscious plea for help, he was clearly burying himself, but no one could see a dream.
"You are indeed a smart person, Xue Qixia." Su Ming’an suddenly said softly: "You know that if you wait any longer, you are surely dead. So you want to show your stance. Even if you fail this assassination, you might still survive—but you only made one mistake."
"What?" Xue Qixia’s fingers tightened. Even with Su Ming’an’s life in his hands, he was the more panicked one.
Su Ming’an reached out, placing a hand on Xue Qixia’s shoulder as gently as a light embrace between true friends. At this mont, Xue Qixia felt only—Su Ming’an’s madness was back.
That sharp madness—exchanging soone else’s arm for an antidote, posing as Doctor Baisha to massacre students, breaking bones to torture Laine, laughing with a bloody head while Qiongdi was on the brink of tamorphosis...
Su Ming’an had been too calm in the Ruined World and the World of Old Days, like a gentle, qualified Savior, that Xue Qixia almost forgot about his latent madness. Under the extre ntal state, this madness seed to surface like an iceberg from the sea.
"Your only mistake was your approach was too direct." Su Ming’an stared into his eyes: "If you were afraid of being settled with and had explained the reasons to , there’s a high chance I wouldn’t kill you. You absolutely shouldn’t have used this threat against . You shouldn’t threaten a ’Number One Player’; it would make everyone else follow suit."
Xue Qixia froze.
He suddenly realized the murderous intent in Su Ming’an’s eyes.
"Su Ming’an, I hold the instant death rule..." He never expected Su Ming’an to be so resolute, clearly signing the prop would lose nothing—
But he miscalculated the great pressure fluctuating in Su Ming’an’s heart at that mont.
A shadow suddenly shot out from the darkness, instantly pressing down Xue Qixia’s knife hilt, black hair flying—it was Xiao Ying. He appeared just in ti, firmly holding Xue Qixia’s knife hilt, while also pressing down on Xue Qixia’s neck, trying to twist it.
"Angel! I’ve got him pinned!" Xiao Ying shouted.
A flash of red light, Xue Qixia still activated the instant death rule. The instant death rule touched Su Ming’an, and Su Ming’an’s vision instantly went dark as he heard the final voices.
"—Angel! Angel!"
"—Xiao Ying, you’re just a rat in the gutter... At this ti of day, there should be no one in Su Ming’an’s room. Why did you appear so tily? Do you dare to explain why..."
...
In the dical room, Chao Yan sat quietly in front of the healer. She couldn’t understand the vital sign data on the examination report, but she could see the serious expression on the middle-aged healer’s face.
"You can’t keep burning your life force anymore. Even if you hold the Life Authority, consistently overextending yourself like this, your life will co to an end." The middle-aged healer sighed while staring at the report.
"So, how long do I have?" Chao Yan calmly asked.
The middle-aged healer said, "You should absorb those stones. Those elders voluntarily poured their life force into them. Even the God is absorbing them, why won’t you..."
Chao Yan said, "It’s useless. The purity of your life force is insufficient for ; it’s a drop in the bucket."
The healer advised, "Then stop burning your life force. As long as you live an ordinary life, you can live for a long ti..."
Chao Yan shook her head: "The stones can be given to God. The Life Authority, after my death, can also belong to God. My initial thought was to nurture Him into a qualified Savior and then leave everything to Him. He’s helped us so much; I should repay Him sohow. Asking to absorb others’ lives to extend my own has no aning."
In her words, she herself was inconsequential. She resolved from the beginning to burn herself as kindling, no matter whether it was a thousand years ago or a thousand years later. She had lived too long, and those once close relatives and joyous old friends were long buried in the endless dust.
The middle-aged healer’s expression was complicated: "Does God know you intend to do this?"
Chao Yan thought of how Su Ming’an had been busy with Su Luoluo’s matters recently and shook her head: "It’s not necessary; it would only add to His guilt."
He’s already exhausted enough. Su Luoluo is also very tired. The warmth they provide each other is sufficient. What use would her intervention be? Clearly, she was always an outsider to the film’s protagonist, no spotlight would be cast on her.
She was rely a teacher who taught him to abandon compassion. On the judgnt seat, so cold and heartless, there was no need to leave a mark on him.
"At least let God know of your sacrifices." The healer was sowhat anxious, being friends with Chao Yan:
"When I was a child, it was you who saved from the battlefield. You taught knowledge of dicine, enabling to work in the Holy City. Back then, I thought, no one was by your side. If in the future you grow old and weak, I could always take care of you."
"Later, I learned you wouldn’t grow old. Day by day, I grew ugly, and so words I kept in my heart, but now I truly want to say them—you are the most dazzling, the most beautiful existence in my heart. You can live a thousand years; I—"
Chao Yan’s gaze lingered on his face, eyes as serene as a lake.
The middle-aged man, never married, opened his mouth. Staring at that face of unchanging beauty over the years, words he had prepared thousands of tis suddenly failed him.
"Xiao Cheng." Chao Yan said, "I have lived for more than two hundred years and witnessed at least seven generations of birth, aging, sickness, and death. So things I have seen very clearly."
Xiao Cheng lowered his head, his wrinkled face trembling.
... Her lifespan was so lengthy, she must have known countless people like him. Even that exceedingly brilliant God... was rely a true friend to her, and what was he, a middle-aged man growing older by the day?
He simply... held so resentnt for God. Why not just look back and see, wasn’t there soone always following behind you? Why couldn’t you care a bit for her? She was already...
Chao Yan put away the examination report and stood up, a faint lemon scent lingering in the room.
"How much longer do I have?" she asked as she walked toward the door, without turning back.
Xiao Cheng’s fingers almost gripped the air as he struggled to squeeze out a few words.
"... Three years."
Despite having a lifespan supposed to last a thousand years, she had burned her life for God with all her might, leaving only three. And God wasn’t even aware of her condition.
Chao Yan’s eyes flickered.
Is that so, three years... It should be enough to finish crafting the Life Hard Drive. Once this step is complete, the millennium plan will basically have no issues. He can successfully clear it, and the world can be preserved. By then, she’ll quietly leave, find a place unnoticed to peacefully end her life, making him think she just went on a trip.
This way... it’s good. She doesn’t want to add sadness to him, so there’s no need for him to rember.
She is far more mature than Su Luoluo. With an age gap of nearly tenfold, she knows that Su Ming’an is destined to leave, and there are still many worlds waiting for him. So, don’t hold too high expectations, and don’t cling tightly to the word "True Friend."
His true friends will be many, so alive, so dead, so yet to be t. In human relationships, one cannot force others to value themselves too much, but can only let things flow naturally.
She took a step forward.
The night cast its light on her swaying ponytail, and the hair tie remained in the shape of a lemon candy, jingling softly.
...
In the dim room, Xiao Ying watched Su Ming’an.
Su Ming’an slept soundly on the sofa, and his heart glowed with a radiant blue light. Xue Qixia’s instant death rule effect was heart explosion, and Su Ming’an should have been dead, but a strong vitality burst from Su Ming’an’s heart, keeping him in a coma.
Xiao Ying was afraid Xue Qixia had other tricks up her sleeve, so he took Su Ming’an away from the Holy City to rest in a remote era. It was an abandoned seaside fisherman’s house.
"...You’re really not afraid of dying." Xiao Ying said softly.
The night sketched his shadow vaguely, and the gloom of the past six or seven years seed to burst all at once.
He initially only wanted to make fun of Su Ming’an, but later it beca contradictory and awkward. Clearly, he hated Su Ming’an for taking away his freedom, yet later he wished he could bear the burden for Su Ming’an.
He raised his hand, then put it down, and raised it again. His fingers approached Su Ming’an’s neck, lingering for a long ti.
Until the first light of dawn ca in through the window, Xiao Ying’s arm weighed like a stone, and he slowly withdrew his hand, clenching his fist, as if angry at his own lack of resolve.
He pushed open the door and stood at the entrance, taking out the black bird sculpture and gently rubbing it.
Dieying appeared by his side, like a phantom.
"Such a good opportunity, and you don’t take action?" Dieying said.
"Stop tempting ," Xiao Ying said.
"Clearly you promised eight years ago that if there were a chance to take action against Su Ming’an in the future, you would kill him. In exchange, I would help you..." Dieying left the rest unsaid: "What’s this? After spending six or seven years together, he’s starting to trust you, yet you can’t bear to do it? Or have you started liking this world too?"
Xiao Ying gazed at the black bird sculpture in his hand.
"You’ve been infiltrating for so long without taking action, truly indecisive." Dieying, with its faint starlight, slowly drifted from Xiao Ying’s right side to his left: "The last words Xue Qixia said, Su Ming’an must have heard before he fell unconscious. He will surely suspect why you were lingering around his room in the middle of the night if you don’t take action. Do you think everything will still be the sa?"
"..."
"He doesn’t pity you at all; you’re not even considered his friend," Dieying said. "You’re not soone bursting with a sense of duty, so don’t be that kind of person for the sake of God."
"...Of course," Xiao Ying said.
He always thought of himself as the later generations—Hei Que, Blackberry, those who died for the Savior. Although great, he would never beco such a person. Through the screen, looking at their relieved smiles in their dying monts, he felt only unfamiliarity.
"So, rember what you promised , don’t be soft-hearted..." Dieying gradually faded away.
Xiao Ying rubbed the black bird sculpture, turned and entered the room, seeing Su Ming’an slowly open his eyes.
Xiao Ying was startled—could it be that Su Ming’an heard his conversation with Dieying?
But Su Ming’an just sat quietly on the sofa, his eyes unfocused, as if still not awake.
"...How do you feel?" Xiao Ying tentatively asked.
Su Ming’an said nothing, his eyes still unfocused.
Xiao Ying recalled that before the coma, Su Ming’an’s ntal state was already on the verge of collapse. Is it now that even his hearing is blurred?
"...Can you hear my voice?" Xiao Ying took another step closer.
His fingers fumbled in his pocket, slowly drawing out a bright blade edge, in the dim room, no light could reflect that hint of snow-colored blade light. Su Ming’an still remained motionless, as if he couldn’t hear or see anything.
...If there’s ever a ti to kill, this is the best opportunity.
Xiao Ying approached with the blade, while his other hand repeatedly rubbed the black bird sculpture—no one knew what it represented to him, but he would always rub it from dawn till dusk.
"...Actually, I don’t hate you that much, even if you pushed into the black mist, it was out of helplessness." With each step, Xiao Ying felt like countless ants were crawling through his veins, the complex and painful emotions coursing through him: "Three years ago I wrote you a letter, stating that if you don’t want to do it anymore, we’d leave together. I was sincere, that’s truly what I thought."
"Dieying said I don’t have to kill you, just make you give up being a deity. Look at what you’ve beco—Su Ming’an, it’s only been six years, can you imagine what you’ll beco in the next nine hundred and ninety-four years? I know for you Players, ti flows quickly, but the suffering you endure won’t be any less."
"I have no sense of rcy for this world; it’s deprived of too much. It took my parents in the slums when I was young, and later deprived of my freedom."
"So, this is a rare opportunity, we can..."
He stopped speaking when he suddenly heard Su Ming’an softly say sothing.
Xiao Ying leaned closer, hearing an extrely faint voice speaking to itself.
"I don’t want... to be God... never wanted to."
The shaky spirit combined with the weight of the instant death rule made Su Ming’an’s rationality seem to have dissolved, his eyes covered with a mist-like film.
Although his rationality would always return again and again. Whether it was void san, tamorphosis, or Ta Wei infiltration, he would always manage to "recover" in the end. This ti of his breakdown would usually be buried in the abandoned tilines, but it was seen by Xiao Ying.
This was a pose that shouldn’t be rembered by anyone. It was a bitterness that should have been swallowed by himself.
Xiao Ying lowered his eyelids: "Yeah, you don’t want to be a deity. I always wanted you to gain freedom. Not just for , but for you too."
The youth with the lightless eyes said in a low voice: "I... never wanted... to lose."
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