‘This was so easy…….’
Ricardo, who had exited the hall, yanked the reins of his horse fiercely.
He hadn't even decided on a destination. But he had a vague sense of where the end would be.
Where Bianca was.
That place was Ricardo’s only final destination.
The mont he spurred his horse, a sharp wind brushed past his ears.
Ssshhhh.
Damn it, the wind was refreshingly pleasant.
The unfamiliar and foreign sensation he felt for the first ti pierced deeply into his mind and wildly stirred up the mories he had suppressed.
mories he had buried deep and ignored, thoughts that had ultimately rotted and decayed.
He had lived a life of obedience. Even after realizing his circumstances, he couldn’t escape his fate.
He believed that if he endured and waited, one day he would be able to shed the na Harnen.
But that had been a grave miscalculation.
After everything had gone wrong, there was nothing left to salvage.
He hadn’t even reigned as the master of his own life. Living in dependence on others was the only way to survive.
‘……Bianca, I think I finally understand you now.’
Why you acted like such a stranger.
At first, I couldn’t understand. Why you lived as if you had no lingering attachnts to this world, like soone sick of everything.
But looking back, I had the sa expression on my face.
Yes, the stranger wasn’t you—it was .
Soone who had lived following only the prescribed path, unable to belong anywhere.
A life where trying to escape bondage made you seem like a weirdo.
I was nothing more than a replaceable part, one that could be discarded anyti if soone else could take my place.
A being who would disappear the mont he lost his usefulness and be forgotten by everyone. Bianca was the one who reached out to fearlessly.
It was because she shone that I could face a world filled with darkness with my own two eyes.
‘So Bianca, you’re not a stranger.’
You’re an intruder who barged into my world, and the only one who saved from a hellish life.
I can no longer erase you from my life.
For the first ti, soone who had wandered without even knowing which direction to go had a destination.
If there was a world she wanted, I wanted to be with her there, no matter where it was.
If I couldn’t reach the end of it with her, then I’d just change this world to match the one she dread of.
So that you would no longer be lonely.
And so that you would never again feel like a stranger.
At that very mont, once again, a strange yet vivid sensation pierced him. And through that gap, he saw Bianca.
Only then did he realize it.
The na of the emotion that had been stirring in his heart from the beginning.
This was liberation.
* * *
‘Where is this…….’
It seed to be the capital, but since it was a street Iwas stepping on for the first ti, everything felt unfamiliar.
I had thought it was near the imperial palace, but that didn’t seem to be the case either.
As I looked around, the sound of horse hooves reached my ears. My body, which had been frozen, instinctively turned in that direction.
“Ricardo!”
At my call, he quickly stepped down from his horse. Judging by the lack of surprise on his face, he must have already spotted .
I had expected his expression to be quite bad, but Ricardo’s face was calr than I’d thought.
“……”
But only for a mont—there was an inexplicable tension lingering in his complexion as he stopped in front of .
I parted my lips slightly and cautiously spoke.
“……What are you going to do now?”
At my casually spoken words, Ricardo blinked his dazed eyes a couple of tis. Then, he gave a bitter smile.
“Bianca.”
“Yes?”
“A lot has happened today, actually.”
The words that followed pressed down on my heart rcilessly.
“I made a choice the old never could have made, but I have no regrets.”
Ricardo continued nonchalantly and gently brushed aside my fallen hair.
“I only hope the ground you stand on is beautiful.”
At last, he withdrew his hand from and let out a short laugh. That smile looked like the most relieved expression I had ever seen on Ricardo.
……He seems okay, so for now I guess that’s a relief. I lightly shrugged my shoulders.
“So this is what you ant when you said you didn’t want to waste the ti you spent with .”
At that, Ricardo paused as if sothing had caught on his mind.
“Well, it’s not like I don’t have any ulterior motives.”
“……What?”
A short silence passed. The gaze that had been looking at slowly lowered.
“Because you want to leave this place.”
“……”
“I want to hold onto you sohow, but I can’t ask you to stay in a place like this.”
I swallowed a dry breath. I had no idea what kind of expression I was supposed to make.
“I know you’ve already made up your mind. Still, I don’t want to just stand by and watch your back as you walk away.”
“……I—”
My lips moved on their own, but I couldn’t continue speaking.
What was I supposed to say?
It felt like my mind had gone completely blank.
I was supposed to go ho, of course. That was my goal, the very thing I’d longed for all this ti.
Wasn’t that exactly why I had been able to speak so decisively to Ricardo last ti?
This was the answer I had always arrived at. There was no other choice.
Whether it was fortunate or not, Ricardo didn’t seem to have said those words expecting a response from .
“I still believe I can build the world you wish for right here.”
“……!”
“I know it’s selfish of , as always.”
That brief pause where he caught his breath felt endlessly long. He continued, his words still unorganized.
“I don’t even know what I want anymore. I want you to stay by my side, and at the sa ti, I want you to be happy……”
“……”
“But when I imagine you with , all I see is you suffering.”
“I wasn’t suffering.”
I cut off his words. But just like Ricardo, my thoughts were in disarray.
“It’s not because of you—I just have to go.”
……Is this the right answer?
Is this really the correct one?
“To where……”
With a voice that sounded choked, he continued speaking.
“To Leon? Or to that first love you kept ntioning?”
Was it nerves? Ricardo’s hand holding mine felt so cold.
“I know. I know you love Leon.”
And with his next words, my confusion deepened.
……Even now, he’s thinking that, and yet he’s trying to hold onto ?
Why?
Is he planning to keep watching as Leon and I stay together?
That didn’t make any sense logically.
Or maybe he simply wanted to remain by his side.
At those arrogant and selfish words, I let out a hollow laugh.
“……You’re doing this even though you know?”
At my words, despair appeared on Ricardo’s face. Yet still, he went on.
“So I won’t ask for your first. Whether it’s a first love or whatever, if that matters, then go ahead.”
Ricardo’s eyes began to tremble slowly.
“But please, let be your last love.”
“……”
“That’s all I want.”
Hot breath sank onto my shoulder.
Contrary to his stubborn voice, his expression was slowly collapsing.
It felt like he was being strangled by sothing. Yet he barely managed to force out the words.
“Do you even know what you’re saying right now?”
Ricardo’s eyes, which t mine in midair, were completely red.
They were resolute, solid eyes, as if he did know exactly what he was saying.
“I like you.”
“……”
“……I really, really like you.”
Along with his teary voice, sothing warm dropped heavily onto the back of my hand.
“So I can’t say it’s okay for you to leave .”
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