Chapter 365: Ugly Heart 2
MADELINE
"I did my research," my father continued. "Even her mother, although she lived a decently long life, used her gifts clearly a bit too much and the side effects of it... it killed her. I have to have her."
Pauline said sothing else. Her voice had gone sharp again, almost panicked.
"I’m not killing her," my father replied. "She will be returned. I just need to observe her."
My stomach turned.
"Are you insane?" Pauline’s voice ca through clear and furious. "You are the reason I got caught in Aldric’s crossfire in the first place. And now that we are free, now that we are rid of that bastard, you want to shackle
again to a new prison?"
"I’m doing this for your sake too."
"For my sake?!"
There was a long pause. Then my father spoke again, his voice calm and asured.
"Think about it," he said. "Call
back when you aren’t so emotional."
The line went dead.
I sat there in the lounge with my hands still pressed against my thighs and my heart pounding so hard I could hear it in my ears. The spell dissolved on its own, the magic fading back into nothing as I released my hold on it.
He was going to do it again.
He was going to go back to the fleshcraft. Back to the experints. Back to everything he had promised was behind us.
Cian had been right...
The thought made sothing crack open inside my chest, sharp and jagged and impossible to ignore. Cian had looked at my father and seen exactly what he was. And I had stood there and defended him anyway in my head. I had chosen my father over the man I loved because I thought it mattered. Because I thought loyalty ant sothing.
And my father had not even waited a full day to pass before proving
wrong.
The door opened.
My father walked back into the lounge with his phone in his hand and that sa easy expression on his face. He settled back into his chair and drank up his coffee as if nothing had happened.
I stared at him.
He noticed after a mont and raised an eyebrow.
"What?"
The word ca out so casual. So unbothered. Like he had not just been on the phone planning to do the exact thing he had sworn he would never do again.
I felt sothing hot and bitter rise up in my throat.
"After everything," I said quietly. "After this family’s suffering and my suffering, you still want to do it. You still want to do fleshcraft."
His expression froze.
"You were listening to my conversation?"
"Yes." The word ca out harder than I ant it to. "I had to. And I was right too."
Tears burned at the corners of my eyes. I did not try to stop them.
"I made all of those sacrifices for this family," I continued, my voice breaking slightly on the last word. "No. For you. And it was not worth it."
My father set his coffee cup down slowly.
"Madeline..."
"I lost him," I said. The tears spilled over and I did not care anymore. "I lost Cian because I put you first. And you mock
for that even now."
"I am not mocking you."
"I feel like such a fool."
He leaned forward and reached for my hand but I pulled it back before he could touch .
"I am sorry," he said.
I laughed. It sounded ugly and raw.
"But that is the thing, is it not?" I said. "To , those just sound like words. Empty words."
I wiped at my face with the back of my hand, saring the tears across my cheek.
"After this, I am telling Mother," I said. "And I am emancipating myself from you and the Blossom na. I am sick of being a filial daughter to a man who would not put
first. Who would not put his family first over his selfish and self destructive goals. I am done with it."
"Madeline, you need to calm down."
"And if you do try to do that evil shit again," I continued, ignoring him, "I will report you myself. That is the only way I see to protect myself, Mother, and Wilhelm at this point."
My father’s jaw tightened.
"You do not an that."
"I hate you so much."
The words hung in the air between us, sharp and final.
"That is not what is happening," my father said carefully. "You heard part of a conversation out of context. You do not understand the full situation."
"I heard you," I shot back. "Most of it."
"People break the law every day and get away with it," he said. "Just because the law says it is wrong does not an it is wrong."
I stared at him.
"People suffer because of it," I said. "You even said it yourself. One of your experints... which by the way you lied that you ended and none of them were alive... is volatile and cannot be... I do not know, sold?"
My father opened his mouth but I kept going.
"How many more are there?" I asked. "How many more people did you hurt? How many more lives did you ruin?"
"Madeline..."
"Do not even answer the questions," I said. "Let this be over and I can be done with anything concerning Primrose and the Blossom house. I am done. I have sacrificed and I cannot do it again. I cannot."
My voice cracked on the last word.
"I want to be happy," I said. "I deserve it. I deserve to be selfish. After all the weight I have accepted for you and this family. I just hate that it wasn’t worth it. None of it was."
"I am sorry," my father said. "I will stop. I will be better. It is just this family’s bane. We have issues."
"Well, that is not how I want to end up."
I stood up and turned toward the door.
Behind , I heard my father move. Then I felt it. The shift in the air that always ca right before magic, the particular weight of intent gathering itself into sothing tangible.
I turned around slowly.
My father had his hand raised. His fingers were already curling into the shape of a casting gesture, magic pooling in his palm like water about to spill over.
For a mont I just looked at him. At the man who had raised . Who had taught
everything I knew about our craft. Who had told
a thousand tis that family ca first, that loyalty was everything, that we protected our own no matter what.
The shock faded quickly.
I felt nothing but a cold, hollow certainty settle into the space where it had been.
"If you want to do it," I said quietly, "do it. And be quick with it."
My father stared at . The magic in his hand flickered.
Then he lowered his arm and let it fall to his side.
I did not wait to see what he would say next. I turned around and walked out of the lounge, pulling the door shut behind
with a firm click.
The hallway was empty. Silent. I made it three steps before my knees gave out and I had to brace myself against the wall to keep from collapsing completely.
The tears ca all at once, hot and relentless and impossible to stop.
I pressed my forehead against the wall and let them fall.
All of those years. All of those choices. Every ti I had put my father first, every ti I had defended him, every ti I had chosen him over everything else that mattered.
And Cian had been right the entire ti.
I thought about the way he had looked at
that last day years ago. The disappointnt in his eyes. The quiet resignation in his voice when he told
he would not choose between
and his pack.
I should have picked him. I should have chosen him from the very beginning.
But I had not. And now it was too late.
I slid down the wall until I was sitting on the floor with my knees pulled up to my chest and my arms wrapped around them. The tears kept coming and I let them. There was no point in trying to hold them back anymore.
I had lost him. I had lost Cian because I could not let go of the idea that my father was worth saving. That he deserved my loyalty. That if I just sacrificed enough, if I just gave enough, he would finally beco the man I needed him to be.
But he never would.
And I had known that. Sowhere deep down, I had always known.
I just had not wanted to believe it.
Right then... I heard horns. It was low but the constant sound of it sounded important and I headed outside the estate to see cars lining up.
When the car stopped, people inside started stepping out and from their attire and the way they carried themselves, I realized this was the elder’s circle.
They were here.
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