Lian Yueyao rembered sothing—according to legend, ghosts do not fear pain, and in dreams, one does not feel. Thus, she pinched herself hard. It was a full-strength pinch—painful, very painful. This was not a dream, definitely not a dream; dreams could not feel this real.
Mu Qiu saw Yueyao looking at herself in the mirror, staring so intently she seed to be in a daze. She covered her mouth and laughed deliberately, "Everyone knows our young lady will surely be a beauty when she grows up, but you shouldn't be so fascinated by your own reflection! If word gets out, who knows how others may mock you!"
Yueyao, seeing Mu Qiu's sweet smile, felt dazed for a mont. This was not a dream; it was real. She had returned to the year she was eight. Lian Yueyao put down the mirror, "I'm fine, you should rest too!" She needed to think deeply about what was actually happening.
Lian Yueyao had one bad habit: she did not like others in her room when she slept. This was why when she awoke, the room was empty. Mu Qiu slept in an adjacent room. It was also because Mu Qiu had sensed sothing unusual in the room and ca in imdiately. Otherwise, Yueyao would have continued to be lost in her thoughts alone.
Mu Qiu quietly said, "Young lady, I'll sleep here." Mu Qiu was sowhat worried seeing Yueyao's dazed and startled expression.
Yueyao humd in response.
Overjoyed, Mu Qiu took it as consent. Although she did not know why the young lady had suddenly agreed to let her stay, it was good enough that she had relented. With this in mind, she quickly moved a quilt from the outer room and spread it beneath the couch.
Lian Yueyao squinted her eyes, silently listening to the pitter-patter of rain outside. Only by hearing the incessant sounds from outside could she confirm that she was not dreaming, but truly existed. Yet even so, Lian Yueyao still slowly asked herself: had she truly returned to her eight-year-old self?
Lian Yueyao thought about her past life, suddenly filled with sorrow. Why, why couldn't she just die? In her previous life, she had attempted suicide over ten tis without death granting her escape, enduring endless suffering. The last ti, in front of Lady Mo, she finally succeeded in taking her own life, thinking she could go to the Underworld to reunite with her parents, only to find herself back at the age of eight. Oh Heaven, what kind of ga are you playing with ?
After wrestling with these thoughts and roaring inwardly for a long ti, Lian Yueyao eventually ran out of energy to rage. Looking at the green gauze canopy, she couldn't help calling out, "Mu Qiu, Mu Qiu?"
Mu Qiu, who had lain down beneath the couch, quickly got up, "Young lady, what's wrong? Are you thirsty?"
Hearing Mu Qiu's words, Yueyao shook her head, denying thirst. Nevertheless, at this mont, Lian Yueyao felt a slight sense of reassurance. She rembered that when she was eight, it was the year they had returned to the Capital City, before she had been coaxed by Lady Mo. The future could still be altered. At this thought, Lian Yueyao regained a trace of warmth. Once she thought positively, that thin sliver of resentnt also began to fade away. After organizing her thoughts, she called out again, "Mu Qiu, Mu Qiu."
Mu Qiu promptly stood again, "Young lady, what is it?" She felt sothing was off with the young lady. It seed necessary to inform Madam tomorrow and have a doctor check on the young lady.
Lian Yueyao spoke quietly, "I just had a nightmare, felt a bit scared; keep the lamp lit." With the light on, the room was bright. She didn't feel as panicked inside, and by looking around the room, she could feel more at peace.
Mu Qiu hurriedly lit the lamp. The room brightened instantly.
Lian Yueyao watched the oil lamp, its fla flickering like it might be extinguished at any mont, yet it stubbornly persisted in burning.
After a while, Mu Qiu got up and adjusted the wick. Seeing Yueyao still staring blankly around the room, she whispered, "Young lady, what's the matter?"
Yueyao shook her head, "I can't sleep; my heart is restless." After thinking for a mont, she said, "Talk to ; tell about what's happened in the mansion recently."
It would ease the weight on her heart, and she had no recollection of events in Lian Mansion from twenty years ago, so she needed to know. This lifeti, she couldn't repeat her past mistake of just copying scriptures, ignoring everything outside. Otherwise, she wouldn't end up in a predicant with no one to help her.
Mu Qiu was Lian Yueyao's Senior Maid, and though she did not go out, she generally knew everything that happened in the mansion. Now that the young lady wanted to know, she naturally shared whatever she knew.
Lian Yueyao had been imrsed in copying scriptures since her return and didn't ask much about the affairs of the mansion. Mu Qiu, upon hearing her desire to know, didn't question and quietly relayed to Lian Yueyao all the recent happenings within the mansion, in great detail, even ntioning how the Second Young Lady, Lian Yuebing, had lost one of her hairpins.
Lian Yueyao listened carefully. Hearing that due to the loss of a hairpin, Eldest Madam had punished Yueyao's Personal Maid, a sneer crossed her lips.
When Mu Qiu finished, she saw that Yueyao was not as impatient with such trivial matters as before, and thus emboldened, she advised, "Young lady, you shouldn't do this anymore. It's right that you copy the Classic of Filial Piety, but you should also take care of your health. Otherwise, the Old Madam will worry even more. Young lady, after the Old Master's death, the Old Madam has fallen seriously ill once; you really shouldn't upset her again."
Only then did Yueyao rember that after returning to the capital, apart from greeting her grandmother, she spent the rest of the ti locked away copying the Classic of Filial Piety. She had fainted from copying too much, prompting concern from her grandmother, who had never recovered from her father's death, and passed away in less than half a year. At that ti, everyone in the mansion said that it was her fault for causing her grandmother so much grief, and people whispered about her being unfilial.
While Lian Yueyao was reflecting on the past, she heard an irritating voice from outside, "What's wrong with the young lady? The lamp in this room has been on for half the night." As soon as she finished speaking, a woman in her thirties, dressed in indigo brocade, walked in.
Yueyao heard the footsteps and looked toward the source. It was her wet nurse, Nanny Gu. Yueyao shuddered at the thought. Nanny Gu, her wet nurse. The mont she saw Nanny Gu, mories like nightmares surged through her mind, vividly resurfacing.
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