51: save5 The Confession, Once More
"Because..."
Liu Lili fell silent.
She didn't know how to explain it to Lu Lele, how to talk about the resistance from her family, and the future that was already set in stone for her.
For a mont, Liu Lili felt dazed. Her mind flashed with scenes, like a slideshow, images she would never forget for the rest of her life.
It was back in her first year of middle school. The teacher had assigned a composition titled "I Have a Dream." Liu Lili picked up her pen and wrote about wanting to go to university, to major in art, to beco a manga artist one day, drawing comics that would bring people joy.
But when her mother saw those words, the response was nothing but scornful mockery.
'Waste of money, you still want to go to university? Don't dream. What does a girl need with such a high education? Auntie Wang's daughter next door only finished junior high, and now she's already a senior technician at the cannery, earning more every month than her own mother! I hear a small business owner has taken a liking to her, they're about to get married. Her life from then on will be wonderful!'
'What's so good about being a university student? And you want to study art? Can you make money from drawing? You might not even find a good job after graduation, and we'd have to waste money supporting you for four years of school! Lili, you should go to a vocational high school. Graduate early, start earning money sooner, help out the family, save up for your brother's university tuition!'
Her father, who liked to drink, who always obeyed his wife, weak and cowardly, chid in drunkenly from the side.
'Lili, you should listen to your mother. She's so sharp, never loses out when buying groceries. The plans she makes are definitely for your own good, absolutely right.'
Back then, Liu Lili had felt anger.
She had thought about resisting, about chasing that small dream of hers.
But in the end, the heavy weight of reality made the practical Liu Lili lower her head.
Especially when everyone around Liu Lili said the sa thing, when even the entire neighborhood circle she was exposed to acted the sa way.
What was once sowhat unacceptable gradually beca the natural, logical course of things.
They were, after all, her family. Kin connected by blood.
Perhaps doing as they said was indeed right. After all, they had raised her, and the people they interacted with were all doing the sa. The proportion of girls going to university was very low.
Liu Lili didn't have a habit of keeping a diary, but that night, accompanied by the plip-plop of tears, she wrote these words on the last page of her notebook:
'Little grass should live like little grass. Lili, you are not a star. You have no right to gaze at the sky.'
From then on, Liu Lili quietly buried her forr dream, buried it in the deepest, deepest place, and never again held any expectation of realizing it.
Then, numbly, she accepted the facts. Accepted the future that awaited her.
How could she possibly bring up sothing like this... to the person she liked... no, to her best friend?
In the end, Liu Lili said this:
"It's just impossible. There's no special reason. Lele, please give up on . Really. Let's just be like before, be the very best of friends, okay?"
"It's because of your parents, isn't it, Lili?"
Lu Lele suddenly spoke the reason for Liu Lili, her tone very certain, then looked at Liu Lili calmly.
Hearing this, Liu Lili couldn't help but freeze.
Her expression instantly beca very strange, then she spoke in a voice full of surprise.
"Huh? Lele, how did you..."
Lu Lele smiled slightly, stating her "preconceived notion."
"Right. After all, not all parents are supportive. Maybe Lili's family is very opposed. Or perhaps... they won't let Lili finish high school and university normally?"
"I've heard that graduates from vocational technical schools have been in high demand these past couple of years. They find jobs quickly after graduation, and the pay is quite good. Quite a few parents from ordinary families have their children attend high school there. Maybe... Lili's parents think the sa way?"
Lu Lele paused after speaking, locking her gaze on Liu Lili's eyes.
"If that's the case, then those worries and concerns of yours, Lili, are certainly not unfounded."
After hearing Lu Lele's words, Liu Lili was so shocked her pupils dilated.
"You... you..."
The corner of Lu Lele's mouth lifted.
"Judging by Lili's reaction, it seems my guess is pretty much on the mark?"
"..." Liu Lili didn't answer imdiately.
Lu Lele tilted her head.
"Did I guess wrong?"
Liu Lili was silent for another mont, then finally sighed.
"No, you didn't. Lele, I don't know why you guessed so accurately, but your speculation just now... is basically the truth."
It was truly hard for her to say it herself, but if Lu Lele had guessed it, then there wasn't necessarily a need to stubbornly deny it. After all, this reason was perfect for rejecting Lu Lele, it was just hard to voice.
Then, Liu Lili asked, puzzled.
"Lele, do you have mind reading? How could you guess so accurately?"
"Of course I learned about this information before and made my deduction based on that. Hmph~ I've made sure to properly understand current affairs and social information, because my big sister told to watch the news more and engage with society more, ehehe~"
Lu Lele shalessly patted herself on the back without blushing or her heart racing, then said.
"If only I really had mind reading. After all, there's one question I really want to know right now~ That is, how deep is Lili's love for at this mont~"
"Lili, tell the truth~ You, do you really like a lot~"
As she asked, Lu Lele grabbed Liu Lili's hand, smiling as she stared at her.
In such a public place, Liu Lili's face flushed bright red instantly, her voice trembling slightly.
"Lele, if, if you keep saying these nonsensical things, I, I'm going ho right now!"
"Alright, alright, I'll stop teasing you."
Lu Lele released Liu Lili's hand, adopting a serious expression.
"Lili, next, I want to ask you sothing very important. I'm being very serious."
Liu Lili cald her emotions a little.
"Go ahead."
Lu Lele nodded, then said.
"Perhaps, we are destined to be unable to resist fate."
"But, Lili, before that cruel fate arrives, could you please accompany in one last, wild revelry?"
Liu Lili was stunned for a mont, seeming to realize the aning behind Lu Lele's words. Her pretty face flushed crimson again.
"You an, could it be..."
Lu Lele looked directly at Liu Lili, speaking gently.
"Liu Lili, will you beco my lover?"
One day later, the rejected Lu Lele persevered and launched her second confession.
This ti, having experienced many cycles, Lu Lele carried a bit more composure, a bit more confidence.
Confessing to Liu Lili again wasn't sothing Lu Lele had planned for a long ti; it was a familiar, spur-of-the-mont, whimsical action typical of Lu Lele.
But it fit Lu Lele's current behavioral guideline of 'being gentle with Liu Lili,' and it was also a brand new attempt.
Seeing Liu Lili's visibly hesitant, conflicted expression, Lu Lele struck while the iron was hot, opening her mouth to speak.
"Don't answer yet, Lili. Close your eyes."
"Don't think about your parents' attitude. Don't think about whether there's a future, things that are far, far away."
"Just think about now. Just think about your feelings for ."
"If Lili feels this emotion is real, is worth cherishing, then, at least for this limited ti, I'd like to ask Lili to walk alongside . We'll deal with later things later. We should live in the present, shouldn't we?"
"So—"
Lu Lele extended a hand toward Liu Lili.
"Lili, will you join , in this limited youth, for a celebration of love?"
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