Chapter 620: Communication
Jabi
Worries that all co back to .
I have put so much pressure on Dar.
Made him feel like he had to live his life for .
That is not how it should be.
We are in a relationship. This is a mutual thing but I have been selfish for so long. I don’t want to bla him but he is the cause of it. All my life, I haven’t had anyone care about
and only . I haven’t ever been the centre of attention but with Darrien, his world revolves around
and that has confused .
Made
so selfish that I couldn’t see that he was hurting.
Hurting because of all the pressure I put on him.
Once the mask is sorted, we planned to leave the community. It was sothing that I wanted.
Sothing that I pushed on him and now, he doesn’t want to leave.
He wants this to be our ho.
My ho is where he is but I lost sight of that.
I was selfish.
So selfish that he couldn’t even talk to . Now I have to be there for him. I have to protect him.
"It’s not a big deal, I guess I have just been thinking about it a lot. It doesn’t really matter where we live, as long as you are there with ."
See.
He is doing it again.
Trying to protect .
"But you want to stay in the community?’’
He nods "I want this to be our ho."
His words are tough because we want the complete opposite right now. I don’t have any ties to this place—I get that just makes
ungrateful but that is just how I feel.
The pack.
I am supposed to feel at ho in this place but I don’t. I feel at ho when I look into Darrien’s eyes. I feel at ho when he smiles at
and no one else in this world. When he tells
that he loves . Those are the things that make
feel at ho.
It doesn’t matter where I am, as long as I am with him.
"I know we agreed that once the mask was done, we would go back to our lives but I have been thinking lately. That this place is not so bad. We could make it work."
He runs his hands through his hair. He is beating himself up for nothing and I am the one that made this sothing that he needs to worry about.
"Is this what you really want?’’
He opens his eyes and I see him watching . Like he is trying to figure out where my head is at.
"I want your happiness.’’ He finalizes. He wants my happiness but what about his happiness?
"Do you want us to stay in the community?’’ I ask him again. I need him to co out right and demand to stay. I don’t want him walking on eggshells with . He should tell
what is on his mind.
He looks away from
and down to his feet. "Just be honest with
Dar. Please.’’
Be honest with .
I haven’t been listening to him.
All this while, it was clear but I chose to ignore it all and think about myself. "I want us to make a ho in the community,’’ he says this ti, his eyes bore into mine. The intensity is strong. I can feel everything that he has been hiding away from .
It feels good in a way to know how he feels because for the first ti, so I smile from the bottom of my heart.
"Okay."
He opens his eyes wide and the shock is evident on his face. I made a scene the last ti he ntioned that we should stay in the community, so I understand why he would be surprised but I’d like to think that I have grown as a person. The past month has changed .
"Okay?’’ he asks in confusion.
I widen my smile "Yes, I don’t care where we are. All I care about it you. If this is where you think would be good for us. Then I am going to trust you. I trust you more than I trust myself.’’
I shrug because suddenly, I don’t even care anymore. About the community, the apartnt, all I care about is making him happy and I know that this will make him happy.
"Huh.’’
He moves closer to
and I let him pull
to his laps. I sit down on him gently and he wraps his hands around my waist. My heart is racing.
"What changed?’’
I shrug again.
"I don’t know, I don’t care anymore. I am happy.’
He smiles "In the community?’’
"With you. I am happy with you, so it doesn’t matter where I am, as long as you are with .’
He leans forward and I let him kiss
because this is the ti for it. He opened up to
and we communicated. That is the one thing that will make this relationship work. Just because we are fated to each other, doesn’t an that it will always be easy. There will be more people like Lenny and Cassius. There will be people that will try to break us, but as long as we stand strong together, we will survive them all.
’I love you,’’ he pulls away from
slightly with his hands still around . I rest my head on his and my eyes close dreamily.
"I love you too.’
Just three words, that are so powerful.
Love.
I know there is sothing else that has been bothering him. In fact I thought that was the thing he was going to tell . Maybe it has been bothering
too. I don’t know, but I know we actually need to talk about it.
"I want to et her?’’ I blurt out the thoughts that have been roaming through my mind.
He pulls away from
more and raises a brow in question "Amber, I want to et her.’’
Yeah, she is the person that is trying to co between us. I think I should et her. Find out what her intentions her and nip it in the bud.
I hope it is a good idea.
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