The Werewolf's Chapter 365: I miss you even when you are next to me

Chapter 365: I miss you even when you are next to

Beau

Thinking about how I ssed up just makes

more upset with myself. He is acting as he has forgiven

but I don’t like the fact that I even had sothing that needs forgiving. I hate myself so much right now and I don’t know how to make things right.

We are still outside on the field. I am still in his arms, scared that if I don’t hold unto him, he will end up rembering why he was upset with .

"I am sorry,’’ I manage because there is nothing else that I can say apart from that.

He caresses the top of my hair and I close my eyes because this seems like a punishnt. I feel like I am being punished even though I am in his arms. Maybe this is all the guilt I feel. I hurt his family. I reacted without even thinking.

"You know what you did wrong, that is all that matters." He breathes into my ear.

I open my eyes and pull away from him slowly. I am the Alpha of this pack and in his arms, I turn into a fucking cry baby. I don’t want anyone to see

right now but if that is the punishnt and I get to be cool with him again, then I would cry in front of the whole pack.

"I don’t know what happened. I just saw him push you and I reacted. It made

insane. I couldn’t control my wolf." I confess. The anger that my wolf felt tonight was more than I have ever felt before. Even with Cassius and everything, just thinking that soone was hurting Lanis drove

off the wall.

His eyes bore into mine. "Did this happen because of the babies?’’ he touches his stomach on reflex and my eyes go to the bump. My babies... our babies. Is that the reason why I went into a protective mode? Is my wolf feeling sothing that I haven’t understood yet?

"I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking. I just didn’t want him to hurt you.’’

"Would you have killed him if I didn’t stop you?’’

I shake my head imdiately "At that mont. I wasn’t thinking. I wanted to hurt him for hurting you. I didn’t want him dead."

That is the truth but I don’t know how far I would have gone. It was a mont that I couldn’t control and yeah, I might say that I had It under control but I didn’t. I was out of my elent. My wolf had the wheels at that mont.

"You can’t hurt everyone because of . you have to get this in check. Do you need Jules again? We can call him back."

I shake my head "I can channel my wolf on my own now. we are connected now. I can’t always depend on Jules coming to put

in check."

He nods "Promise you will try harder the next ti sothing like this happens?’’

I raise my hands up imdiately "I swear on my life,’’ I give him my word. He grabs my hand imdiately and shakes his head "No swearing on your life. It is mine. I can’t have you bargaining for what is mine.’’

For the first ti today, he smiles at

and it lts my heart. I know I will need to apologize to Belis. I ssed up but there is no going back. All I have to do is focus on the now and how to make things right. I need to prevent this from ever happening.

"Is this what they call daddy instincts?’’ he jokes with a smile.

My heart thuds at his words, because this is really happening. I am going to be a father. He has my babies inside him. fuck, it still feels so surreal to

and I can’t get over it.

"How about boyfriend instincts, husband instincts. Right now, I see you and only you. I want to protect only you.’’

My words are sincere. the fact that he is carrying my babies inside him just adds to how much I worship him. he is everything to

and I will be eternally grateful for the life that he has given . this doesn’t have anything to do with the babies. This has everything to do with him. the fact that he has done so much for

and he doesn’t even ask for much in return.

"I take you any way you are, you know that right?’’

I nod imdiately because I feel the exact sa way about him. I know I am not perfect and I don’t even want to act like I am. I want him to keep seeing

the way I am. I want to show him all my imperfections.

"Co on, let’s get you inside the house and all cleaned up,’’ he wipes a trickle of sweat from my forehead. He takes

for the ss I am.

I walk with him into the house and he holds

tightly as we walk back to my room. I take off my clothes in front of the door and he smiles "Soone is eager,’’ he mutters once I am completely naked. He pulls

into his arms again and I rest on the crook of his neck. It feels like ho. Nowhere but near him will ever feel like this.

"I have to go and check on Belis. I need to have a conversation with him.’’

I pull away from him because I don’t want him to go to him alone. He raises his hands up "Done worry about , he will not hurt .’’

I frown because I don’t like this one bit. I know that Lanis can protect himself but I just don’t even want to have to think of him needing to protect himself. I always want to be the one to protect him.

"Have a shower and I will be back in a jiffy. You won’t even miss ,’’ he kisses my forehead softly, and even though I want to tell him that I will most definitely miss him. I let him walk away from

and out of the room.

As I go into the bathroom, my heart lingers for him in my arms again.