[So the tad beast part was a lie?]
"I an I did have a dog as my tad beast. It just died of old age and is now buried ho, however."
[The brother part?]
"I always was a unique child."
[Why the hell did you delve so deep inside that story then?!]
"It was fun seeing your reactions. You were starting to feel sorry for , right?"
How about I unscrew his head off his shoulder and truly feel sorry for him?
"Haha, let this be a lesson too. Don't trust everything people tell you. I was just joking about it, but soone could exploit that."
Sad to admit but he's right. I know so little about this world that I am easy to trick. An obvious solution is to read, but even then, learning how would take a long ti.
"Don't worry about it. Kidding between friends is sothing normal."
Wait, are we friends now? This has huge implications. This guy is my first fat friend here. Anyone not understanding how aweso this is needs to review literally all eastern novels. There is always that one funny fat and loyal character next to the MC. I might just be a normal dude, not any main character, and he might not be fully fat either, but that will do.
From now on I have my own fat friend! I look him dead in the eyes.
[I will consider you a friend but know that you will have a huge responsibility. You will need to shine more brightly than all others. You have a plethora of funny and fat characters to compete with after all.]
"What's that about being fat?! Are you insulting ?! I'm barely overweight a bit! And I look cute too!"
[You see little Bai from where I co from you fit that one archetype of character perfectly. I will be expecting great things from you. Do not worry for this is no insult, but truly a heavy burden to carry. You will have to beco one of the most attaching individuals there is and beco strong all thanks to for so bullshit reason. Otherwise, we would have failed all the existing legends.]
"Wait, are you assigning so role based on a bard's song?! This is insane I don't even know which ballad you are talking about?!"
[All of them little Bai, you see your fate was sealed the mont you called yourself my friend. Your destiny beca filled with suffering from that point onward. With enough challenge to make anyone give up and beg for death, but not you. Yes, not you for you will beco that legendary friend character.]
"Can I take it back? You are starting to scare now!"
[Little Bai do you know the inner workings of fate?]
"Of course not!"
[You see fate is my specialty and you dood yourself by declaring to be my friend. You might not know it but I am a wanted man. One that has many assassins sent after him by various forces. They are jealous of how I manage to accomplish so much while I have so little potential. And now you just beca their target as well for interacting with .]
"There is no way! We just t!"
[It is too late little Bai, you called yourself my friend, and most importantly called yourself my fan in front of others. They will learn of that soon enough. You will see they will co for soon. Except I will be long gone. Instead, they will learn about little Bai.]
"*Gulp* T-then what?!"
[They will learn about how close we are. They will ask you about my whereabouts. Of course, you won't know, but they won't give up. They will first crush your bones, then your spirit, and finally your soul. All until they can get the information out of you. Information that you would never have possessed in the first place.]
"No way!"
[And then they will turn your body into a bloodthirsty revenant that will follow their every wish. They will turn you into a hound to try and destabilize my psyche. Knowing full well that we are friends. Then soday we will et again. In your empty eyes, there won't be a single trace of life. The little pieces of your shattered soul screaming for true death. Hoping for oblivion.]
"What the fuck!"
[And then I will help. I will gaze directly at you and will say this: it has been a long ti, old friend. Then I will burn whatever remnant of you there still is and free you.]
"No way in hell!"
[You also have one alternative. To leave before their forces arrive. I will be leaving tomorrow at dawn. Whether you are there or not I will be leaving. How you deal with whatever happens next will be your own responsibility. Alright, see you later friend. One way or another that is.]
"What the hell man?! Wait, where should I even join you tomorrow?!"
[Oh, you don't have to follow. I am sure you are one resourceful guy. Later.]
"Just tell already!"
I co closer, making sure no one is listening to our conversation. Of course, I am simply bluffing, but he doesn't seem to notice.
[*Whispering* outside the city is a small lumberjack camp. I will be sleeping there tonight and leaving from there. They already may have scouts roaming about. Don't be seen or you will be the first to die most likely. Also, my pursuers are ones that reward their inforrs with swift death to prevent anyone from ssing up their plans. Don't even try that. Well not if you want to live. Alright later.]
He looks at leaving, completely at a loss. A mix of panic and incredulity. As I leave, I scream behind.
[Thank you, stranger, for telling about the na of my teacher. For that, I am truly glad, but next ti please make the story faster. I am a busy man you see. Thank you and take care!]
I am wondering how long it will take him to realize that I am joking. HAHAHAHA
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