[Translator - Pot]
[Proofreader - Kawaii]
Chapter 176: I Didn’t Want to Cry
Friederun looked at with disbelief.
“Is… is that really true?”
“It’s the absolute truth.”
“But how… how could this—”
She was so shocked that her hands trembled. I gently held them to calm her.
“Friederun, I understand your confusion. It’s only natural.”
“……Ah.”
I channeled the calm, sea-like energy of the Eternal Ocean Chain Technique mana technique, which helped soothe her.
“Are you feeling a bit calr now?”
“Yes, Your Highness. Thank you.”
Friederun took a deep breath, steadying her racing heart.
“Here, take this.”
I pulled out Zizek’s letter from my pocket.
“It’s a letter from one of my subordinates. It details the conversations I had with the survivors of Eisenach.”
“Ah, this is—”
“It contains everything—what happened that day, how they’ve lived since, and how they’re doing now.”
I explained further.
“Only three mbers of the direct line survived: my great-uncle Balthazar, my cousin Knut, and my younger cousin Tara.”
“Ah!”
Friederun looked as though she might faint from shock.
“J-just three? Then what happened to the rest of the…?”
“They’re all gone.”
“Where are the three of them now?”
I pointed downward with my finger.
“Right here.”
“Huh?”
“Balthazar gathered his two grandnephews, distant relatives, and so soldiers and servants loyal to the clan. They ford an organization in the underworld and have been living here ever since.”
“Good heavens.”
Friederun staggered, and I quickly steadied her by holding her arm.
“To think that the most noble among the mountain clans would live such a harsh life…”
“Well, they say life in the city is easier for them than life in the mountains.”
I said it as a joke, but it was likely true.
“You know how it is—the darkest place is often right under the candle. They’ve disguised themselves as an organization called Haglandere.”
“…….”
Friederun seed both bewildered and convinced by my explanation. If this smooth-talking were all a lie, I could’ve made a decent side career as a playwright.
But unfortunately, I’m not a man of literary talent.
“Now, let tell you my story.”
“I’m listening.”
Her eyes, filled with human compassion, and her lips, tightly pressed as if she needed to remain defensive in this situation, told everything.
Even this alone showed that there had been a significant bond between Friederun and the past .
“After I woke from my fever, I carefully extended my reach into the underworld and absorbed a small organization under my command. A trustworthy man t with them on my behalf.”
“Huh?”
Friederun looked at incredulously.
“But you hadn’t even been awake for long. How could you have done all that alone…?”
“The you rember couldn’t have done it. But I’ve completely changed. You could say I've been reborn.”
Now that I’ve regained Karzan’s mories and his self has replaced the fragile self of Allenvert, I’ve beco an entirely different person.
“……My subordinate, with a bit of luck, was able to contact them without much difficulty. At first, they disard and detained him, interrogating him to uncover his identity. It was a cautious and appropriate response, and it showed that my great-uncle Balthazar is no fool.”
Friederun nodded quietly.
“Her Ladyship often spoke of studying under him.”
“I know.”
“Ah, so you knew that too.”
“It was in the letter.”
Friederun now seed to fully believe . After all, these were details she couldn’t have known otherwise.
“They were surprised but pleased to learn that I had sent soone to find them. However, they requested a handwritten letter from my mother as proof of trust.”
“Ah, I see. Of course, soone could’ve impersonated you.”
“They’ve lived through tis where caution was the only way to survive. It was the right decision.”
At this point, I looked directly into Friederun’s eyes.
“Friederun, what do you think drove to do all this?”
“…….”
Seeing her pained expression, I continued.
“When I first woke up, I thought it was strange. Why didn’t my mother co to see ? Why did the servants and doctors hesitate to speak of her?”
“Ah……”
Friederun covered her mouth. Tears welled up in her eyes.
‘How kind-hearted you are, Friederun.’
A part of my heart ached, perhaps because the boy Allenvert’s soul found so small solace in those tears.
“Think about it, Friederun.”
This tone of mine must be completely different from what she rembered. Back then, I might’ve called her na affectionately, with a hint of childishness.
But our relationship can no longer be what it once was.
“I was like a boy who woke up alone in a strange room. I persuaded the servants to tell stories, t with the head butler, visited Ludan to read martial arts manuals—”
I listed everything I had done after regaining my past life’s mories and losing my current life’s mories.
“All of it ca from a desperate need to do ‘sothing’. In the process, I learned about what happened to my mother, why I had chosen seclusion in the past, and the fate of being on borrowed ti.”
I edited so parts, but most of it was true.
“Young Master, how could you endure such hardships twice?”
Friederun finally pulled out a handkerchief to dab at her eyes.
“After learning all of this, I realized what I had to do.”
I spoke with unwavering determination.
“I will join hands with the survivors of Eisenach and take revenge on those who stole everything from us. I will beco the King of the Mountain People, ‘Lordstir’. With the blood of Eisenach in my veins, I have the legitimacy to do so.”
In a way, this was no different from the path of Kylen Webern, the young ambitious man who sought to reclaim the long-lost County of Webern.
“You know that na too, Young Master.”
“And so do you.”
Friederun, who had served by my mother’s side longer than anyone, would naturally have heard of ‘Lordstir’.
“How could I, with my mory loss, have known about it?”
I asked and answered my own question.
“Either my mory loss was a lie, or I truly t them.”
“……Now I understand, Young Master.”
Friederun looked at with tearful eyes.
“That’s why you needed to et Her Ladyship even more.”
I nodded and asked, “Do you see now? To avenge Eisenach, to take the first step, I need my mother’s help more than anything.”
“I… I understand.”
Friederun nodded slowly, as if she had finally understood my words.
“But that’s not the only reason.”
“Huh? Then—”
“I can no longer rember my mother’s face. Even my mories of her are nothing more than fragnts, pieced together like a patchwork quilt from the recollections of others and the pages of diaries.”
“Young Master.”
“If I were to go my entire life without seeing her again, wouldn’t that be too tragic?”
I felt compelled to add more.
“...If I fail to find Ereshkigal or rid myself of the poison within , I will die soon anyway. If that happens, I’ll close my eyes for the last ti still longing for my mother.”
“...”
Friederun bowed her head. Pity for , combined with the information about the survivors of Eisenach, would surely lead her to accept my proposal.
“Even if my mother doesn’t respond as I hope, it’s fine. At the very least, this letter will let her know what has happened to our clan, their feelings, and their well-being. That alone is enough.”
“Understood, Young Master.”
Friederun carefully tucked the letter into her embrace.
“I will make sure to deliver this.”
“I’m counting on you. You’re the only one who can persuade her.”
Friederun hesitated, shaking her head as if at a loss for words.
“But she is afraid. Afraid that her son might resent her, afraid that if she returns now, she’ll be dragged back into the ruthless political struggles and suffer even greater wounds... Everything is regret and fear for her.”
I nodded.
“I understand her feelings.”
I wouldn’t condemn her for that weakness.
“To be honest, Friederun, it’s true that the Allenvert of the past wrote in his diary about his longing, concern, and even his hidden resentnt toward his mother.”
“...Yes, of course he would have.”
“But the mories of that young, fragile boy are gone. Now, I think differently.”
I pressed a thumb to my chest.
“I fully understand my mother’s heart. It’s not her fault. It was simply a tragedy too great for any one person to bear.”
This was my sincere feeling.
“There’s no need to bla the ship for failing to cross a stormy sea. That would be too cruel.”
Even so.
“My mother has a role only she can fulfill, and above all, there is still a path of vengeance left to settle the grudges of the past.”
I stretched out my hand, as if grasping sothing, and continued.
“And she must know that her only son has seized that path with his own hands. This is, after all, sothing for the sake of our mother and son.”
“...Young Master.”
A resolute light finally appeared in Friederun’s troubled eyes.
“First, please accept my bow.”
Friederun perford a bow that felt sowhat unfamiliar to .
“This is a gesture passed down only among the Eisenach.”
“Friederun.”
I sensed her determination.
“Your devotion, Young Master, and your thoughts for Her Ladyship have moved deeply. I will deliver this letter and do everything in my power to persuade her.”
“I thank you from the bottom of my heart, Friederun.”
I helped her up as I spoke.
“In the anti, I’ll prepare diligently for the confrontation with Valkenhain.”
“...I wish you good fortune.”
“Both you and I must do our best in our respective roles.”
I smiled faintly.
“So now, it’s ti for my mother to return to her place.”
“...Yes.”
“It’s not wrong to feel overwheld and collapse under the weight of the journey at tis. That’s only human. But—”
You can’t stay down forever.
“Eventually, you must rise and walk again. Otherwise, Lusatia Grunewald, my poor mother, will spend her entire life as nothing more than an empty shell, like a doll.”
“Young Master,” Friederun said, her voice tinged with emotion.
“You’ve truly beco a man like the sun.”
“I aim to be the sun that brightens the day and the moon that embraces the night.”
That is the path I must walk as Allenvert, as Karzan.
...And then.
‘Damn it.’
I turned away and rubbed my eyes.
“Ah, this is embarrassing.”
I sighed.
“I didn’t want to beco a crybaby in front of you.”
“Young Master.”
Friederun laughed, her voice watery.
“In my heart, you’re still that kind, tearful, yet truly lovable and clever boy.”
[Translator - Pot]
[Proofreader - Kawaii]
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