“...Why do you say that, Noah?”
I was about to say that wasn’t true at all, to ask why he would think that, but I closed my mouth. Noah spoke first. After days of deep thought. So rather than press him, I waited.
“I know that I, I an, I’m not useless. I could start a guild again any ti, I could join anywhere. So I understand this is just greed, unreasonable greed...”
Noah began with an excuse, saying he already knew. It was a very defensive posture.
“But now it’s not just the S-rank Hunters around you that I envy, Yujin, I’m starting to get jealous of non-awakened people too. I know I shouldn’t feel this way. I know I don’t have the right to. But I’ve known you longer. There’s not much difference, but I still think I could be more helpful. And yet.”
His pale gray eyes looked at desperately. He even looked a little afraid.
“...You personally went to them, told them you needed them. You even opened up to them. And now they’re going to be part of the breeding facility. I know it’s not sothing to compare. You’ve treated kindly, paid attention to , and I’ve received more from you. But still, I keep getting jealous, and I hate myself for thinking like that...”
“Noah.”
“...Why am I like this?”
It was hard to open my mouth. Could I tell him that it was okay, that those feelings were natural? Comforting him wasn’t a bad approach, but it didn’t seem like it would help Noah much right now.
More than anything, Noah was belittling himself far too much. Objectively, there was no need for it at all, and that seed to make it harder for him. If he were non-awakened, he could simply say “I’m weak, so it’s okay,” and use that as an escape. But he was an S-rank Hunter. He was exceptional. He should be like the other S-ranks around , and because he couldn’t be, he was looking down on himself even more.
“Well, everyone gets jealous sotis. I do too.”
“No, it’s different. I only admire from a distance. I just sit here doing nothing and wishing. It’s pathetic... even now, all I’m doing is whining...”
“Noah, how can you say you’ve done nothing? You’ve helped so many tis. And even Liette admitted you’ve changed. She calls you Noah now. Even at the license test center, she passed by you without issue.”
He had clearly changed a lot. Plenty of people remain stuck, but he had managed to start loosening even a bad relationship. That ant he was moving forward.
At my words, Noah’s gaze dropped further, to his feet.
“...No.”
He took a small breath in and said,
“I haven’t done anything myself!”
He shouted like a scream.
“Sorry, I’m sorry... for yelling...”
“No, Noah. It’s okay.”
“But I... even though I’m ✪ Nоvеlіgһt ✪ (Official version) an S-rank Hunter, I haven’t done anything on my own! This, too, was sothing my sister created for . Even when I tried to break away from her... I had help from Guild Leader Seoseong. And you, Yujin, you paid the price and pulled out.”
His trembling voice wavered as it continued.
“Even the fight with my sister, you helped with all of that, didn’t you? I hesitated and avoided it all, and even when I finally went to see you, it was only because Myungwoo pushed forward.”
“Noah, but still, you took that step yourself—”
“I don’t even know what I want to do anymore!”
Noah crouched down like he was collapsing, tears falling freely. He curled his back and sniffled like a child.
“I tried to think of sothing, sob, I an, I thought... since I’m S-rank, maybe I could do sothing...”
I wanted to console him, but I couldn’t approach him easily. My hand hovered awkwardly in the air. Maybe letting him say it all was better. What should I do?
“Like dsang, I wanted... hic, sothing like that... but I’m not w. I could never do it alone... even if you, Yujin, say it’s okay... I don’t know what to do, or what I even want... I don’t know anymore...”
...How long had he been wrestling with this on his own? After seeing dsang, after standing in w’s place, it seed Noah had wondered if he could do sothing like that too. But it must have felt hopeless. He wouldn’t even know where to start.
He probably hesitated a lot even when using points to exchange for skills. Whether to pick sothing that would let him grow as a support-type S-rank Hunter, or to set that burden down and rest. People would say the forr is right, but the latter isn’t wrong either. There was no reason Noah had to grow or sacrifice himself for support-type Hunters.
‘...But I can’t just tell him not to feel pressured.’
I had already told him he could lean on others. I’d told him to co ho. And yet Noah kept thinking. If I were to cut that thought process short just to make him feel better, that wouldn’t be right either. Comforting him unconditionally wasn’t always the answer.
But still, I didn’t want to just leave him like this, I couldn’t, and as I hesitated, the door creaked open.
“Excuse .”
A woman in her early twenties poked her head out and looked at us. The person I ca to see, Min Sohwan. Both I and Noah looked up at her.
...Right, this was an apartnt hallway. She must’ve heard everything. I quickly bowed my head in apology.
“I’m sorry. We’ll leave soon—actually, I ca to see you, Miss Min Sohwan.”
“?”
“Yes.”
“...You’re the breeding facility director, right? And that’s Hunter Noah.”
When I nodded, Min Sohwan said “Just a mont,” closed the door, then reappeared shortly after.
“Co on in for now.”
“Thank you. Noah, you too—”
“...I’ll just stay out here.”
“Co in.”
Min Sohwan waved lazily. Noah glanced at , then slowly stood up. Despite the old exterior, the inside of the apartnt had been remodeled and was quite clean. I handed her the gift I brought first, and she eyed it suspiciously.
“Were you the one who sent the Korean beef during Chuseok too?”
“...What? Ah, no.”
“Feels like it was you.”
She muttered that there wasn’t really anyone else who would send it. Still sharp as ever. She said there weren’t enough chairs and told us to sit on the floor, then hesitated when going to get drinks. Must not have done the dishes. Probably shoved everything into a corner when guests showed up. Most likely stuffed the bedding into a built-in closet too. When I said it was fine and not to worry about drinks, she nodded and sat down on the floor.
“Well first off, this is a single woman’s ho. You two may be famous, but still, I don’t think two n should just show up unannounced like this.”
“I’m sorry.”
Right, it wasn’t a workplace. It was her ho. I hadn’t thought that through. I was the only one who felt close to her; for her, we were strangers.
“And I’m sorry too. I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop, but I heard everything.”
Min Sohwan gave Noah a slight nod. Noah shook his head, his face a bit red and eyes still teary.
“No... it must’ve been loud.”
“I know it’s not really my place to say, but since I heard it anyway.”
Min Sohwan tilted her head and looked at Noah as she spoke.
“Most people are like that.”
“...Pardon?”
“Doing what the adults say and not knowing what they really want to do. I don’t know about other countries, but usually up until college, people don’t have so grand vision. They just say their dream job is a teacher, a doctor, or a strear. The goal is to get good grades and ace the college entrance exam. And when they apply to college, they mostly just say they want SKY or at least a university in Seoul. They don’t decide their major until after the test, based on their scores.”
Noah blinked. A teardrop rolled down like a bead. I—uh, I had nothing to add. What was my dream back then?
“And actually, when you’re young, there’s nothing wrong with following what adults say. It’s about access to information. You have to know sothing before you can start making plans for yourself. It’s not that you lack agency, you’re just young.”
Min Sohwan said that it felt empty with nothing in the house, then poured a glass of juice and placed it in front of Noah. Looked like that was the only clean cup.
“I heard Hunter Noah is only about college age, is that right?”
“I’m an adult, but yes. Around then.”
“Then not knowing what to do on your own is normal. Not knowing what you want to do next is also normal. and my friends, we’re constantly saying stuff like, ‘What do I do after graduation?’”
“But I...”
“It’s not too late to start thinking now. Honestly, you’re faster than average.”
Noah fiddled with the juice glass, glancing around anxiously.
“I’m an S-rank Hunter...”
“Still, your worries sound a lot like ours. The content might be heavier, sure, but people your age all go through this. And you weren’t born a Hunter either. You’ve probably only been one for, what, less than four years?”
“...Everyone my age is like this?”
“My parents got this apartnt too. I don’t even work part-ti. I live off allowance. Sure, there are people who have to do everything on their own from a young age, but most people stay under their guardian’s care until they’re adults. These days, even after college.”
Noah stared at Min Sohwan, dazed.
“But if I’m weak... if I’m useless, then I shouldn’t—”
“What kind of crazy bastard says that to a twenty-year-old?”
Liette and Seong Hyunjae do. Not . Min Sohwan, having raised her voice sharply, brushed her hair behind her ear, looking a little embarrassed.
“I don’t know what kind of life you’ve had, Hunter Noah, so I won’t speak carelessly, but that’s definitely not right. You’re still at an age where it’s okay to be protected.”
“Exactly, really.”
I chid in and agreed. Thinking about it, Noah didn’t have anyone around to say things like that. Not , and not Yuhyun or Yerim either—we had all been independent from a young age. Myungwoo struggled but succeeded with his own ability, and the research folks go without saying.
Hearing confident people say, “You’ll be fine too,” probably just felt like more pressure. It would make you think, “I need to be like that as soon as possible.”
“...Still, I don’t really know.”
“Neither do I. I’m just saying what I think. I’m not so expert. I’m just ddling since I heard. And also because Hunter Noah is good-looking. If you weren’t, I probably would’ve just said ‘so noisy’ and gone back to sleep.”
Well, he is handso. When soone like that cries, it’s only natural to want to help.
“So I’m not saying I’m absolutely right. But I’m not wrong either. That’s how most people live, after all. Just take it as a reference. Want to wash your face? The bathroom’s over there. Washing your face after crying makes you feel a bit better, right?”
Noah nodded and stood up. Min Sohwan turned her gaze to . She was asking why I had co.
“Well, actually, I wanted to ask if you had any interest in getting a job.”
“Huh? But I haven’t graduated yet.”
Min Sohwan had been attending school just fine without any issues. For now. The reason she beca a Hunter was because of her father’s accident. She didn’t want to talk about what exactly happened, so I never found out. If I had known I’d return, I would’ve forced it out of her.
Her father had ended up in long-term hospitalization, and with the family’s situation worsening, she went to an awakening center on a whim and beca a Hunter—a pretty common path.
“...Did you know I awakened?”
Min Sohwan asked suspiciously. Awakened?
“You awakened?”
When I used the Promising Talent skill, her status window ca up. The system was still unstable, so there was no optimized info, but her stats were E-rank. She nodded with a look that said she regretted saying anything.
“It was back when a monster appeared. I awakened while hiding to avoid it.”
Ah, that ti. That didn’t happen before the regression. Then there must be other people who awakened earlier than in the previous tiline too.
“But the skill isn’t anything useful for a Hunter. Pricked Ears, Double Liver, Stealth—good for hiding, really.”
Pricked Ears (F) let you hear better. Double Liver (E) reduced anxiety and suppressed tension—probably how she stayed calm even with Noah, an S-rank, in front of her. Stealthily (E) was literally a skill to hide your presence.
“If a dungeon break happens, I could hide, but that’s not gonna happen anymore, right?”
She shrugged, saying the skills were useless. She had the sa skills in the previous tiline too. She also had one offensive skill and liked ambushing people. Still, dungeon raids weren’t for her.
By then, Noah had co back from washing his face. He looked a bit refreshed. Min Sohwan said crying makes you thirsty and told him to drink the juice.
“I’m sorry. I must’ve looked pathetic. I don’t even know why I keep crying.”
“You weren’t pathetic. You should cry when you need to. I don’t like it when people say crying makes you weak. And honestly, Hunter Noah still looked good even while crying.”
Looks like she really liked his face.
“You can co after you graduate, so at least hear the offer.”
I couldn’t prevent her father’s accident, and with so much changed, I didn’t know what would happen. But if things got hard at ho and she ca to , I could help. When I explained the terms, Min Sohwan looked at like I was a scamr.
“Is this so hidden cara thing?”
“No, it’s not.”
“You’ll get scamd if you keep giving stuff away like that.”
...Why is a college student more cautious than people who’ve been in the workforce? Then again, once you start working, you learn quickly not to pass up a good offer. I handed her a business card and left.
“What should I do?”
Noah asked as we went down the apartnt stairs. He still looked lost in thought, but it seed he didn’t want to bottle it up anymore after hearing Min Sohwan’s words.
“Like she said, Noah, you have ti. You can take it slow. Try different things.”
“...What if I fail?”
“Then I’ll help. And so will the others.”
There are people besides who will look after Noah.
“Right now, I’m kind of like your guardian. Even if sothing goes wrong while you’re trying sothing, it’s okay. I can clean up most of it. And we’ve got Myungwoo too. The folks at the lab wouldn’t turn a blind eye, and Soyeong would jump right in to help.”
And Liette wouldn’t ignore it either. Even if she said she’d acknowledge his independence, she’s not the type to just stand by if her brother gets hurt.
“You probably can’t fully believe right now. It’s scary.”
Yerim said the sa once. It would take Noah a lot longer to truly believe he wouldn’t be abandoned. No matter what anyone says, the best way to know is to experience it yourself... Would it be faster to let him ss up once?
Soone like Yuhyun or Yerim would boldly crash through things... Not that Noah could do that, but maybe it wouldn’t hurt for him to ss up once. Sothing manageable. Sothing that doesn’t hurt others too much—preferably sothing only financially damaging.
“But for now, I can only say this much. Whatever you want to do, or even if you don’t particularly want to do sothing, if you feel like it, go ahead and try it.”
Noah hesitated, then gave a small nod. I hoped it cheered him up, at least a little. Hmm.
“Want to go to the aquarium?”
“What?”
“The aquarium. It’s not far from the breeding facility. I’ve never been there. And we’ve never gone out sowhere to have fun together. I wonder if Yerim’s been there? I bet Yuhyun hasn’t. Should we go together?”
“Oh, with everyone? I’ve never been either.”
“Let’s go today—just the two of us.”
Noah’s eyes widened.
“Just the two of us?”
“Yeah. If we want to go with everyone, we’ll have to call ahead, coordinate security. They won’t let us near anything dangerous if there’s a risk of breaking it. But we’ll be fine. We’ve got stealth skills. As long as we don’t get caught~”
I gave a playful smile.
“We can go have fun without worrying about anyone else. You and .”
“...Yeah. That’s true.”
Noah smiled faintly too.
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