My breaths were no longer calm, the sunrise now no longer co to in the morning for the start of my day. Everything to for now especially the sunrise because it ant that a new day was starting and I was witnessing it rise.
I let a breath out and ca out in installnts. It was shaky and it confird in a business that I felt deep inside .
This relentless, this unsettling feeling was not gking away.
Fuck Konrad. If I saw him ever again I was going to say that to his face from what I have learnt on the streets it ant sothing really bad and that the person hated the other one.
The ti had passed to quickly to my liking. There was a week before the wedding when I was directing their asses and before I knew where the ti had co for to walk down the aisle.
"Sister—Oh!" Catherine had a shocked expression on her face as I turned around to look at her. "You are awake. We were expecting to wake you."
I smiled at her, "I couldn’t sleep." I admitted to her.
" On your wedding day?" She frowned. "This is going to be the most important day of your life."
"It is." I agreed as my throat prickled. I wanted to cry.
I gripped the sides of my dress and turned around to get myself a good glass of water. I wanted a cold glass of water. I think it would co my spirits more.
"Ginny?" I heard Catherine take a step. "Should I call so one? Why are your hands shaking? The water is falling dow—Gi-Ginny?" She whispered at the end I could focus on the glass of water that I was drinking. My hands were shaking and the water was spilling. I think I had spilled more on my own dress rather than drinking it.
"rilyn!" She ran out and without monts I heard more footsteps arriving into the room. I said hands on my shoulders and soone great divided the glass from . I could not focus on who it was but I felt myself being pushed back onto the bed.
"Princess?" rilyn ise ca in front of mine and I looked into them. They were full of concern and fear for . she had placed her hands on my cheeks as she tried to bring back from wherever I had lost myself to.
I did not know.
"Princess?" She whispered, "what is it? Are you in so kind of pain? Should I call soone for this? What is happening!" She shrieked.
" I-I," what was this? I was not feeling any kind of painful. There was no body part that was a king. Yet I felt like crying. I felt sothing cool trickle down my cheek and I imdiately raised my hand to see what it was. A droplet of water was on my finger as soon as a race to my eyes. I was crying? Why was I crying?
Who was I crying for?
"I. . ."
She gripped my finger and I watched as her hand covered mine. "Is your finger paining? Is it bleeding? Should I apply sothing-’’ she saw it, turning to herself only to find nothing there.
"Princess?" She called out in desperation.
I gulped. " I don’t know," finally I told her as I felt my eyes burn with tears. Angry hot tears in those were. I did not know why they were coming to my eyes.
She wrapped her arms around and hug to herself. It was a tight hug which did not bring any comfort as it usually did.
Sinhgad my head towards the left side of hers and my eyes imdiately ca in contact with the dress that was hanging by straight ahead of .
It was then I realised what troubled .
"I don’t want to marry."
The warmth I had been feeling pulled away and soone had my face as they brought it to their line of sight. "What?" rilyn whispered. "I didn’t hear you, what did you just say?"
One look in her eyes and I knew that she was pleading with not to repeat what I had said. She was pleading with to change those words but I wanted to be truthful to her.
"I don’t want to marry," I told her, shaking my head. Tears dripped down my eyes as I told her the truth in a shaky voice filled with it and fear. "I don’t. I can’t."
"Can’t!" She shrieked, appalled by it all. "what do you an you cannot? Do you even know what you’re talking about?"
" That," I I looked over to the white dress. As grand as it was with the long vile resting beside it. "Sothing I do not want to wear. I do not want to wear the dress rilyn. I did not select it," I shivered at the thought and wiped my tears, barely being able to talk with the crying, "I can’t do it. I don’t want to wear it. It’s too much."
"Too much wha—" she cald down and looked at Knowingly. "It is him, is it not? It is him that now hinders you from performing the duties."
I bit my lip as I lowered my head in sha. It was difficult for stop it was an entirely new problem that I was facing. I did not want to wear the colour white with the grand dress and with a ring ready to be worn by my ring finger telling the world that I was married to a man who was not Tristan. It was so difficult to not marry the person that I loved.
I do not know what dal in said next but I looked out of the window. It felt like it was calling out to and I wanted to reach it.
lenmore dependent on . Is dependent on the alliance that was to be ford after I was married. They needed my help. They needed the ring on my finger.
I had to do this. Bus no ti for hysterics from .
"We have a few hours to go for the wedding Marilyn. A lot of ti is left, I just want to step out of the palace once and I will not trouble you regarding this matter again."
She looked at with hopeless eyes.
" Please," I begged, " let go, for a small walk, just once." I pointed to the window. *Just this once. "
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