Sotis the places that I felt most comfortable were where I didn’t belong.
But…
Was this really a place I didn’t belong?
I glanced to my right, at the pair of ears near my face. They twitched ever so softly, which told she had felt turn my head.
Over her head, between her ears, I could see the book she was reading. Her finely manicured nail was softly rubbing the bottom of the page, as if anxious. A quick glance at the words on the page told she was in the middle of a heated scene. The main character had just t the man she was being betrothed to. By force, by her father. If I rembered correctly it’d be here where she’d start to plan her sche to usurp her father and take his crown for herself.
Renn would likely verily enjoy such a story. Especially a plot such as that. I could see her liking the character, and her personal convictions and the things that drive her. Her desire to choose her own husband. Her desire to find freedom by taking on one of the greatest burdens one could and becoming the ruler of a mighty nation.
Renn was rather similar. She wasn’t afraid to desire and chase after sothing that many, if not most, would find either foolish or even lackluster in worth. She didn’t do what others would. She was a woman who didn’t hesitate to reach out for what called to her… even if what she desired was so strange.
She could have anything. Anyone. Yet she chose sothing stupid.
.
She could have went anywhere in the Society. Picked any of the locations. Picked any of the n or even any of the won. She likely could have picked several had she felt the desire to, as well.
Yet here she was. Sitting with instead.
She had started reading the book not long after the sun had risen, and since turning the first page hadn’t looked away from it.
Her ears twitched again, and I smiled as I looked away from her. She was still aware of her surroundings, but she was definitely engrossed in the story.
Renn… she was a romantic too, wasn’t she?
I thought about it as she turned the page, a little quickly. She couldn’t wait to see what happened next.
A part of didn’t see her as a romantic. She wasn’t like Sharp. But…
Yes. She was. Even if I didn’t want to admit it.
Though… it wasn’t like I found such a thing to be bad, or unattractive. I just didn’t like it when such desires and sches were directed my way. At least, not usually.
I shifted ever so slightly, as to raise my left arm and hand. I rested my head against my fist, and was glad Renn hadn’t been bothered by my movent.
We were on the couch, and Renn was sitting up against . It was actually a little awkward, since the couch was so soft. I kind of sunk into the backrest, thanks to how fluffy it was, and as such wasn’t able to give Renn as much body to rest against as she would usually have at her disposal. I had to sit at a small angle to make sure she could rest against comfortably, so as she’d not rock or fall over.
Renn didn’t seem to mind at all. She was more than happy to sit there reading her book, humming softly as she dived into the world and its characters… but …?
I was facing a new kind of hell. One I’d not known before.
A long ti ago I had once been tortured. It hadn’t lasted long, but it had been brutal. It had occurred while I was young, not long after my parents died.
I’d always believed it was those monts that had made a man. Not my parent’s deaths. Not my actual growth. Not the first ti I’d lain with a woman or killed soone. Not my first war. It was those few days of torture that had given birth to the man I was today. By force.
Those days had genuinely been painful. I would and did not wish to relive them.
Yet here I was, debating which was worse. Those long brutal days… or this.
It wasn’t because of how I was sitting, or for how long. I was not uncomfortable at all. Nor was it because I was actually in pain. I honestly didn’t even feel that tired. The couch was soft. Renn was warm. Her humming was far from grating on the ears, and was instead almost musical enough to lull to sleep.
I honestly had nothing to complain about. I should be grinning in joy, in fact.
Rather…
“Hm…” Renn huffed quietly as she turned the page. She must not have liked the marriage candidate the main character’s father had chosen, at all.
I resisted the urge to gulp as her tail slowly rose upward, and then slapped back down. It was a very cat-like movent. One that told she was annoyed. That up and down movent was unmistakable.
Her tail slapped again. And I’d have smirked at its movent… except it was slapping my thigh. She had laid it across my lap as if I was so pillow. And…
It slapped my thigh again, and I closed my eyes and did my best to imagine the pain.
That blinding pain that had engulfed . That had nearly broken .
The pain that I’d never felt again since. I reminisced for the first ti in centuries about those monts… Hoping the mories would distract .
Renn shifted a little, tilting away from … as she leaned forward as if to read closer. The movent was normal, and not even really worth noticing… but as she did so she also leaned away from . For the tiniest mont, I was free of her touch… then she leaned back again, thumping as she turned another page.
Internally flinching, I rubbed my eyes as gently as I could so that she’d not notice.
I’ll never dub what had happened to torture again. That hadn’t been torture. It hadn’t been anything more than simple pain.
This was true torture.
How did anyone survive this…? How had I? It’s not like this was the first ti I’ve had a woman act like this… Celine had used to sit back to back with , as we talked and she wrote in her journals. It had been sothing we had done often. She liked to write in her journals in the adows, outside.
I hadn’t even blinked at those monts. I had even forgotten about them until now. They had been that uneventful, and without note.
Yet here I was… breaking out in a cold sweat…
This was sohow harder than her sleeping next to .
Why? Why was this making so anxious? Why did it bother so much?
It made absolutely no sense. I couldn’t even rember feeling like this even when I had been a young boy. I’d never been this anxious or…
Renn then released a huge sigh as she lowered the book to her lap. She left it open, and for the tiniest mont I thought I was free.
Maybe she needed to use the restroom, or wanted to eat. Or…
“Is the author really a woman, Vim?” Renn asked. She leaned back a tad, to rest the back of her head against my shoulder.
“Yes… why…?” I asked as I did my best to calm down.
Maybe her asking questions and talking to would make this easier and distract .
“I’d not think like this. Like… her. This queen. She finds things attractive that I’d not take note of… or would find unappealing, even,” Renn said as she tapped the book.
Smiling at her, I wondered what kind of specific thing she was talking about. I could rember the scene, to a point, but nothing specific enough to understand what she actually ant. “Not every woman, or person, is the sa Renn. Everyone all has different preferences. Plus it is still just a character in a story,” I said.
I was living proof. What was it about her simple antics right now was making so weak? She was just sitting against . It wasn’t even that sexual.
“True… but honestly I had expected sothing… well… different. rit and the others seemingly love this character, and her romantic encounters,” Renn said with a strange tone. She sounded upset… but not so much at the book, but herself.
Was she… angry that she wasn’t enjoying it as much as she had expected herself to?
“It gets spicier later, if that’s what you’re upset about,” I said carefully.
Her tail thumped my thigh again. “Does it…?” she asked, turning to glance at again.
I nodded. “Yeah… and she does mature and change throughout the story. I’ll not spoil it, but the series covers many decades of her life,” I said.
“Oh…? Is she the author? This princess?” Renn asked.
Princess…? Oh. Right. The main character isn’t a queen yet.
Hm… “No. It’s a purely fictional story. I like the way your mind works though,” I said.
She giggled, and I flinched at the feeling of it. It felt wonderful.
“I know you do,” she said happily as she leaned even more against .
I should have kept my damn mouth shut…!
Renn moved ever so slightly… as if swaying to so unheard lody. As she did her tail also started to move again, though this ti instead of thumping up and down it swayed back and forth, likely alongside whatever song she heard in her heart.
“Is it hard? To make a book?” she asked.
“Depends on how you want to make it. It’s not the simplest process, no, but it’s not so difficult we couldn’t make one if you wanted to,” I said. Did she want to try her hand at writing stories?
“How many have you made?” she asked further.
Huh…? Oh. The one I sent Rapti. “That hadn’t been a real book, Renn. It was a report. It had been during the beginning of the wars, and Celine was busy. So sotis when I returned to Telmik I didn’t have a chance to et her and tell her of what happened. So sotis I left those reports for her. I just wrote in blank booklets or pamphlets… sotis I just wrote on scratch paper, or on the back of scrolls,” I explained.
“Hm… Have you ever written a real book then? Like this?” she asked.
“No. I… used to read a lot. I used to devour books like you do those berry smoothies. But I’ve never written anything like that myself,” I said.
“You like to read?” she asked as she leaned back a little more. The tip of her left ear was now close enough to touch . I had to lean my head away a tad, since the tip of it kept brushing against my jaw.
“I did. Or well… maybe I still do. But I’m busy nowadays,” I said.
Plus today’s world wasn’t well equipped at producing anything really worth reading anymore. Even the human societies and cultures were… a little primitive and lackluster at the mont. They were all still recovering from the wars. Most places, even the larger capitals and kingdoms, didn’t even have libraries anymore.
“Hm…” Renn humd thoughtfully, and I wondered what she was scheming. Hopefully she wouldn’t start reading aloud. As much as I’d enjoy hearing her read the story, using her own voice to give the characters life…
I weighed the idea of listening to her read aloud. I’d enjoy it, actually. I’d likely find it quite lovely.
But that was the problem. I’d enjoy it too much. It’d just be even more torture for .
I lost even when I won. What was I to do with myself…?
A part of wanted to go back to the awkward silence of last night.
Oplar had sowhat interrupted our conversation. About what I’d done to make the people here despise . And Renn had… oddly gone very quiet after I had told her. And although she had sowhat returned to normal during our cooking of, and eating, dinner… She had returned to that strange silence afterward.
She hadn’t even said goodnight to last night. She had simply crawled into bed next to and fell asleep. It wasn’t until this morning that she had spoken to , and she’s not brought up what I’d done since.
It had bothered her. I still wasn’t sure yet which aspect bothered her the most… but it was obvious it had done so deeply. Rather deeply.
To be honest I had expected it to. It was why I had tried to not bring it up around Oplar, even though Oplar knew full well what I’d done. It wasn’t like those here kept it a secret or anything.
Renn was free to co to any conclusion she liked… but I hadn’t wanted Oplar’s opinions to alter them… in any capacity. Oplar didn’t believe in faith. At all. So her stance and opinion on the matter was heavily skewed in one direction.
My happily humming companion on the other hand, even if she didn’t subscribe to religion… found it to be sothing precious. Even if she didn’t believe that the being I had killed had been a god, a real one or not, didn’t matter. To the people here, these residents of this town, she had been.
To them she had been a real deity. Sothing important beyond asure.
So my slaughter of her was very serious. And very cruel. Sacrilegious and debase. It was not sothing to be so easily or readily overlooked and dismissed.
I couldn’t help but smile at the mory of her furrowing her brow, going deep in thought as she pondered it. It ant she had heavily weighed what I’d done, and likely had found at fault.
She hadn’t asked for the whole story yet, of course… but…
Either way I was glad she was willing, and able, to judge in such a way.
There were too many in the Society, in the world even, that forgave or didn’t comprehend the severity of my actions sotis. They allowed their personal feelings, and even their indifferent attitudes, to overlook so much…
I’d be lying if I didn’t claim that one of my personal opinions and requisites to call soone friend, was for them to not forgive so easily.
I was looking forward to the conclusion she had co to.
And so too the many more she’d eventually reach down the road. Although as terrifying as it was to imagine her learning so much about … it was all the sa exciting, too.
How would she judge ? Would her love falter? Grow more pure? Would she sigh at , or smile?
I couldn’t wait.
“Vim…” Renn’s tone changed a bit, and my heart thumped. Was this it? Would she bring it up now?
Yet before she could continue, soone knocked on the front door.
I frowned, and not just because we were being interrupted again.
I hadn’t heard them approach at all. Strange. This whole building was surrounded by flat grass and brick stone.
Renn really was distracting .
Renn huffed, yet didn’t move. She remained leaning against , which ant… well…
“Co in,” I said loudly, since it was clear Renn had no plans to let up as to open the door.
“Vim…?” Thrain’s voice sounded a little worried as he opened the door and entered.
It only took him a few steps to reach the front room, and he paused halfway through the doorway upon finding us.
I studied the large man’s shocked face for a mont, and wondered if Oplar hadn’t told him about us yet. He looked absolutely stunned.
It was too bad Renn was facing away from him. She’d have enjoyed his expression.
“So it is true…” Thrain whispered, to himself, as he collected his nerve and entered the room.
Ah. So maybe Oplar had warned him. He had simply not believed it.
“Have a seat,” I said with a tiny gesture to one of the larger chairs across from us.
Renn tilted her head a little, as to watch Thrain sit down. He did so wearily, as if suddenly exhausted.
It likely looked normal, thanks to his size and appearance… but the reality was Thrain was not a weak or unhealthy man. He could run for miles without breaking a sweat. I’ve seen him do it.
“No one ever believes it,” Renn said simply. She hadn’t needed to see his expression after all. She had likely heard his shock in his whisper, and his unsteady self as he sat forward.
“I still don’t either,” I told her.
Renn’s ears fluttered for a small mont, and then she giggled as she leaned even harder against .
I tried to ignore her happy mont as I focused on Thrain… who although was still quite obviously shocked, he was at least calr now. He even had a faint smile forming on his face.
“I must say I’ve… never considered it. Is she uh… are you like him?” Thrain asked Renn.
“I’m far more selfish than he is,” Renn answered.
Thrain frowned in a way that told he had completely misunderstood her aning.
Moving just enough to cross my arms, I ignored Renn’s tail that thumped in annoyance. She must have thought I had been about to stand up. “I can be pretty selfish,” I said, defending myself.
“What…? Once every thousand years? Please,” Renn said.
Hmph.
“Well… Um…” Thrain shifted a tad, and his clothes strained thanks to it. He was unsure of what to say, or do, it seed.
“How’ve you been Thrain?” I asked, in an attempt to break him free of the weird atmosphere. I had asked yesterday on eting him, but I knew the kind of man he was.
He never gave the full, honest, answer right away. It took a little prodding to get it from him.
“Oh… Not well, to be honest.”
I nodded. I had assud so. He and his wife had been odd yesterday. A little… too distant. Not just with either, but with each other.
They’d never been the most… active couple, in showing their affection, but they had seed a tad unnatural. They had sat a little stiffly. Hadn’t looked at one another. He hadn’t even helped her with her chair, either. He was usually a gentleman.
I’d have blad Renn’s presence, but I knew better than to do that. Thrain and Ash weren’t as prickly about visitors as the rest of their people. Plus Renn’s ears and tail made it quite obvious she was one of them. A non-human. There had been no doubt of her allegiance. They knew I’d never bring a human here, yet they always panicked at first until it was proven those I brought were non-humans.
Was an odd discriminator practice… especially when one considered what their supposed god had forced them all to do, and be.
“The world has gotten noisy again, Vim,” Thrain said as he leaned back in his chair, relaxing a little.
“Has it?” I asked. I didn’t like that I had thought similar not too long ago. I wonder why he believed so as well.
“Has it not?” he asked back.
Hm…
“This place seems rather quiet, though,” Renn said gently.
Thrain perked up, as if he had sohow forgotten Renn was even here. Then he smiled and nodded. “Yes. We’re rather proud of our simple lives. But fear not, it can get noisy. It’s just… well…” Thrain went quiet, and coughed.
“Vim’s here,” Renn finished for him.
Thrain’s eyes went a little wide as he quickly shook his head. “No…! Or well… yes. When he first arrives, there’s no doubt the village grows a little weary and quiet… but it usually returns to normal after a single night. No… rather, there’s… well… another reason…” Thrain went quiet again, and I wondered if I should ask Renn to step out or not.
Renn turned to look at him, her ear brushing my own as she did.
“You don’t seem too bothered by him, honestly,” Renn said as she studied him.
“Hm…? Vim…? Oh. No. I’m disappointed in what he did, but I don’t hate him for it. Nor do I fear he’ll harm or my own, either. Most here would not agree with , but I know Vim is not the kind of man to act rashly. I… don’t agree with his choice, but I know why he made it and where he ca to such a conclusion,” Thrain said, telling her what he has told almost everyone else I’d heard ask him a similar question.
Renn’s ear fluttered and she humd. “I’m… honestly very humbled to hear you say so. I’ll be honest I don’t know the whole story yet… but just so you know, I’d understand if you hated him. Or despised him. You’d have a right to, considering what he did,” Renn told him.
Oh…? Interesting. So that was the conclusion she ca to.
Thrain smiled at her. “A very predator-like perspective. And an interesting one, coming from you. Especially if you’re what I think you are,” he said.
“And what do you think I am, exactly?” Renn asked, her voice told she was smirking and amused.
Thrain hesitated, and then glanced at .
I frowned, and wondered if maybe I had misread him. I had assud he had been simply talking about her being my wife… did he think she was sothing else? Sothing different…?
Surely he didn’t think she was a god or sothing, right…?
“You’re… well… His wife, aren’t you?” Thrain asked with a point at .
Renn huffed. “Technically? No. But I’d both like it and be content if you thought so,” she said.
Thrain’s eyes narrowed as Renn shifted a tad, as to side-glance with a glare.
“Against my better judgnt, yes. She’s beco my companion,” I told him, and her.
She sighed. “I know it’s just your personality, and you don’t an it in any negative way at all… but I really want to sotis hear you use other words to describe our relationship, Vim,” she said.
“I’ll do it next ti, honey,” I said.
Renn imdiately froze, and then sat up a tad as to really look at . She looked just as shocked as Thrain had upon walking in.
Thrain coughed a laugh. “Well, I’ll be! Where has this Vim been all this ti?” he asked loudly.
“Right here?” I answered.
Although Renn had a weird smile on her face, she calmly sat back down against . Her tail had started to coil around my thigh, though.
“I’ll say not, Vim. If you’d been like this the whole ti my people may have ward back up to you by now,” Thrain said.
Renn made an odd noise as she shifted a tad. “It’d humanize him, sure. But don’t let him fool you, that’s the first ti he’s ever called honey,” Renn said.
Had it been…? Are you saying I’d never teased her that way before?
Maybe not…
“Indeed… maybe I should have the two of you wander around, or eat amongst the village. I wonder if it’d work…” Thrain began to ponder as he sched.
I sighed. “Before we get involved in all that, can I know why you’ve summoned ?” I asked.
Thrain startled, and I realized I probably shouldn’t have been so abrupt and rude about it.
He now looked hurt.
The large man shifted a bit, and frowned in a way that told sothing was wrong. Which was odd… he hadn’t told right away upon eting him, so whatever they wanted from couldn’t be that dire or serious… could it?
The village had looked fine. I didn’t, and hadn’t, sll anything wrong. No fires. No bodies or corpses. No death.
But…
Thrain glanced to my right, at Renn. The way his eyes lingered on her told he was now studying her in a different light. Before he hadn’t believed his eyes… well… now he didn’t want to believe them.
Was he not just coming out and saying it because of her…? Surely not, right?
“Ok… Vim. I’m so terribly sorry, but…” Thrain then nodded to himself, and focused on .
Oh? Was he going to ask for so privacy? Really?
“You really… the two of you… are you married or not?” he asked.
I sighed as I rubbed my eyes.
Renn giggled at my discomfort. “We basically are… but we’ve not had a wedding or anything,” Renn answered him.
Maybe I should file for a divorce.
“Huh… I’m half tempted to ask for an invitation,” Thrain said lightly.
Please don’t.
“Thrain…” I said stiffly.
He jolted a smidgen, and then quickly nodded. “Right… sorry.”
No he wasn’t. Oh well. Least it ant whatever I was here for was no big deal. Maybe they needed sothing made for them. Another waterwheel maybe?
Thrain took a tiny breath, and nodded ever so gently. “It’s my nephew, Vim.”
“Hm…?” I frowned as I wondered what that could an. His nephew? Was sothing wrong with him? Is that why I had been summoned?
If he was sick or sothing why hadn’t they brought straight to him? Or him to ?
“He’s committed an unforgivable act. He… murdered another. Out of pure jealousy,” he said as he went to rubbing his temple.
Renn slowly sat up. For the first ti since we’d sat down this morning, we were separated. Or well, her tail remained on my lap, but not her. She turned, as to properly sit on the couch and face the man. “Murder…?” Renn asked.
Thrain nodded and sighed. “He’s from Ash’s side of the family. As you know, Vim, they can be… very possessive. But he took it to another level entirely. The lad recently married a young girl. A beautiful young lady, who is just… as pure and lovely as they co. She was nice to everyone. Friendly. Supportive. She ca from a long line of highly regarded mbers of our village,” Thrain explained.
“Did he kill her too?” I asked worriedly.
“No. Thank Viva! The poor girl is distraught, but she’s fine. The lad, my nephew, killed the other man because he believed him to be trying to steal her from him. It was absolutely unneeded and wrong. The man he killed wasn’t married, but there had been a good reason for it,” Thrain said quickly.
“Reason?” Renn asked.
“He hadn’t preferred won,” Thrain answered.
“Ah…” Renn nodded, understanding.
“If such a fact was well known, why the murder?” I asked.
“Who’s to know, Vim? The lad had tendencies of violence. He had gotten into a few fights with others, mostly because he was jealous or quick to anger… but many in Ash’s family are like that. Ash once beat back and blue for just seeing another woman naked, on accident! It’s just how they are,” Thrain said.
Renn shifted a tad.
“Beatings aren’t the sa as outright murder,” I said.
“No. They’re not…” Thrain said softly.
“So… I’ve been summoned to…?” I asked slowly, to verify what I expected.
He nodded. “We’d like you to be his executioner.”
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