When will I ever throw away my anxiety and open up about my mistakes to you, Liohi Kitagami?
***
Jolene Aurora ran away from ho when she was sixteen. Her household was not in the best state, after all.
With her father being an abusive alcoholic and her mother letting out her frustrations on her with her own abuse, she had been carrying this turmoil for years.
However, as she thought that she was finally at an age where she could have survived on her own, she fled, and decided to run far into the outskirts of the neighboring country, called Polar Town.
However, she imdiately found herself struggling to take care of herself, and just when she had thought that she was finally in the clear, he had been attacked by a creepy old man in an isolated space while returning to her apartnt.
On the brink of death while struggling to fight off the person who had tried to pin her down, she raged, and with the disgusting dread that had latched onto her body due to her past trauma, she bashed his head into a wall without rcy...
And she did it again...
And again...
And again.
Until, finally, she cald down, staring at the lifeless body in a pool of blood that drew from its exposed brain matter.
At the sa ti, that man had arrived, and stumbling onto the scene by accident, he rely watched on, gazing upon her terrified, but aggressive state.
With tears in her eyes, Jolene spat on the corpse and kicked it, before turning around, and then stopped.
She exchanged glances with that man for the first ti.
--And that would be the beginning of Jolene’s tenure under the Shinigami Soldiers, as Matsuo Yamamoto had dragged her into the fray via blackmail.
The introductory process was a bit awkward and nerve-wracking, but he had successfully introduced herself as the new mber to all of the other current mbers (which were only three others at the ti). Her eyes inspected each person until it stopped at the young man with a shy expression.
Black hair, and light brown eyes. A boy who barely stood out. Soone who seed like a quiet individual, but wore a serious, firm expression.
What an interesting individual, she thought.
And as his eyes t hers, the teenager quickly shifted his eyes away, but then slowly returned his gaze before waving shyly, to which Jolene returned a wave.
That was when she t Liohi Kitagami.
After so ti and various missions resulting in so accidental etups on the job, Both Liohi and Jolene slowly but surely began to get closer to each other.
"W-Woah, you actually fucking did it, Lio!"
"Well, I lost the bet, didn’t I? So, I have to stick to my word."
She had t up with him at the theatre to watch a movie, but was flabbergasted by his yellow gradient dyed hair, and his light yellow colored contacts.
"I don’t necessarily hate this, you know," he stated, "but this will definitely make stand out more, so I’ll have to get used to this."
They both were having lots of fun spending ti together, until-
"Lio, I’m sorry."
"H-Huh?"
"I can’t...be your girlfriend."
Jolene had rejected Liohi’s proposal shortly after leaving the theater while returning ho.
Although she knew that Liohi wasn’t like him, she still had a fear of getting into a relationship with n after seeing her dad’s behavior and actions with her mother, as well as her bad experiences with other n.
She just couldn’t, which hurt both of them, and their relationship had beco a bit tense.
More ti passed, and although the duo were still friends in a sense, their friendship was slowly becoming rely a formal recognition.
Liohi had got himself a girlfriend nad Tisha Marsey, and Jolene had spotted them walking ho together while being hidden from their sight.
The stress from the brutality of her job and other factors, along with seeing Liohi being genuinely happy with soone else was overwhelming, which led to her first real breakdown.
Then, she finally called Liohi to et her, and then seduced and coerced him into sex, despite her initially rejecting him a long ti ago, signalling one of many mistakes that she regretted.
"Why...would you do that, Jolene, when you said that you had no interest in ?"
"..."
They both had their backs faced to each other, as they both sat on the edges of the bed a few minutes after, and Liohi was rightfully troubled, as he had his own girlfriend to worry about.
"You took my virginity. You know that? And you simply decided to use for sex, anyway, just to relieve yourself of stress. You don’t really fucking care about , huh?"
"I-I’m...sorr-"
"Forget it. I’m out of here."
Liohi cleaned himself up and left, leaving Jolene to curse herself with guilt, knowing that she did sothing stupid and that their relationship was now most likely broken completely.
Then, about a month later, Tisha had found out about Liohi’s connection to the Shinigami Soldiers, and after a heated argunt, they broke up.
Jolene opened her door as she heard knocks, and was completely baffled by Liohi’s presence.
"Lio...?"
"Can I co in?"
"S-Sure."
Despite their rough past, Jolene was still pretty much still the closest person to Liohi due to his extrely small social group, and as he poured out his heart to her, ntioning how he and Tisha broke up and that he had no clue what to do, she really listened, until Liohi was about to leave.
"Lio, about what happened between us-"
"Don’t remind -"
"No, we really have to talk about it-"
"No!!"
He tried to move away from her, but she pulled him back and tripped, and Liohi fell on top of her on the living room floor.
He had held down her wrists tightly, and Jolene’s eyes wavered, before averting her eyes and showing no signs of restraint.
"You can get payback if you want, you know. I won’t be mad, and I won’t fight it."
"What...are you-"
"You know what I’m talking about. It’s fine, Lio."
She pulled him in closer.
"We both have nobody, and you clearly still don’t like to get into a relationship with , so...how about we just use each other to get the stress out, huh?"
Using each other...that was what Jolene had proposed...
...Beginning the complex connection between the two that continued for a long while until Matsuo Yamamoto found out and put an end to it.
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