After the last ti I saw Daiya Oomine at school, I received an e-mail from his address. Just one. There wasn’t a single word about him written in it, let alone a greeting. All it contained was a ho address in a distant prefecture that I had no connection to whatsoever.
Though I didn’t know his true intentions, I could tell it ant sothing important.
I jumped aboard a bullet train without waiting for the next vacation to roll around.
The address is in an upscale residential neighborhood, and the house in question has a large square footage for the area.
But for whatever reason, the beautiful residence doesn’t quite seem to fit in the neighborhood. Its spacious garden isn’t maintained with much care, and there is a general aura of lancholy to the place.
And everything changes the instant I see the naplate.
It says OTONASHI.
—This is the house where Maria grew up. I know it.
I hurriedly ring the doorbell. As soon as a weary-sounding middle-aged woman answers the door, I ask her about Maria without even saying hello. Her attitude changes drastically upon hearing the na Maria, and she ends the conversation right there.
No doubt about it. This woman knows the Maria I don’t—the one who has never encountered a Box.
In that case, I can’t let up. I’m capable of sacrificing friends for Maria’s sake; there’s no reason to let this stop . I ring the doorbell over and over. Once I figure out they have no intention of responding, I climb over the gate and kill what I assu is a purebred dog they keep on the grounds of the manor. By the ti the woman hears its final yelps and rushes out of the house, it’s already dead. I show her its innards as a warning.
Now that she knows firsthand what a crazy bastard I am, the woman finally answers my questions out of sheer terror. She tells about Maria and Aya Otonashi.
The lady turns out to be Maria’s aunt. I learn the story of the tragic accident that befell the Otonashi family, and how Maria was left all alone in the world. None of her relatives, including her aunt, know what Maria is doing now or even where she is.
Yeah, I knew it—that’s how it is.
Maria has only .
—That’s why I will find her and save her.
But that vow is a mory from the distant, distant past.
It has nothing to do with the boy holding hands with Mogi now in this endlessly fake world.
I know none of it is real, but I simply live in this happy world.
Yeah—
If only that were true. Then I could have been saved.
30,333rd Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
32,875th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
35,890th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
37,227th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
“…Huh?”
What gives?
This is the mont when we confess our love to each other, the most joyful mont of my life—but it doesn’t make very happy.
40,301st Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
I love Mogi, too. But I’ve realized sothing.
“…Wait until tomorrow.”
This world is a ti loop. I have to bring “her” back into my normal life, even though I’ve forgotten her na. That is my goal, set in stone.
It’s why I can’t return Mogi’s feelings, no matter how much I care for her.
I run from the schoolyard and make my way to the roof. If I jump from there, I can keep my mories in place.
It’s probably a miracle that I noticed this world is just the sa day on a loop. If so, then I can’t let this opportunity go to waste. It’s possible I’ve gone through this day tens of thousands of tis already without realizing it.
It’s not that jumping to my own death doesn’t frighten . It’s insane. But fear is not enough to break my resolve.
I jump beneath a sky dyed red by the sunset.
Splat.
As I hear the sound of my own skull and its contents scattering across the ground, my consciousness—
40,302nd Ti
—stays.
I throw up all over the classroom floor, overwheld by the shock of the fall just a mont ago.
With a backward glance at my confused classmates, I dash out of the room. I have to find a lead about the other girl. I’ve forgotten her na, but for so reason, I still rember where we went together.
I run around, searching for traces of her. But I find nothing.
Even if it was fruitless this ti around, I must not lose these mories. If I ever stop questioning this world, I may end up repeating the sa day tens of thousands of tis—tens of billions.
I jump again under the red sky. My head splatters.
40,303rd Ti
I’ve gone all over the school, but I don’t find anything that helps.
I jump, and my head splatters.
43,058th Ti
“
”
49,178th Ti
My emotions return for the first ti in quite a while, and I rember how to speak.
I start sobbing. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t keep killing myself over and over.
“…Let’s go back…and have fun at the school festival.”
I leave the rooftop and head for the bonfire in the schoolyard. Mogi starts talking to .
I can never again ignore Mogi’s confession.
“I love you, Kasumi Mogi.”
Thus, my long, long struggle cos to an end.
55,555th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
59,876th Ti
“Wait until tomorrow.”
This world is a ti loop, I’ve realized. I have to bring “her” back into my normal life, even though I’ve forgotten her na. That is my goal, set in stone.
To hold on to my mories, I jump beneath a sky dyed red by the sunset.
65,222nd Ti
“…I’ll go back. Go back into that fun school festival.”
I can never again ignore Mogi’s confession.
“I love you, Kasumi Mogi.”
Thus, my long, long struggle cos to an end.
66,666th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
70,512th Ti
“Wait until tomorrow.”
To hold on to my mories, I jump beneath a sky dyed red by the sunset.
78,165th Ti
“I love you, Kasumi Mogi.”
Thus, my long, long struggle cos to an end.
88,888th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
102,538th Ti
“I love you, Kazu.”
“I love you, too, Mogi.”
“Let’s stay together forever.”
“We will.”
I love her, and she loves back. Is there anything in the world more wonderful than that?
I’m the happiest man on the planet. I want to stay this happy forever.
So what gives?
Sothing feels incredibly wrong. Hey, was this world always this colorless? Was it always this cramped and oppressive?
I’m so happy, and yet I’m struggling to breathe—as if I’m at the bottom of the sea.
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