"It’s not worth all the troubles we face these days. We had a simple life outside of Lockwood thanks to your father’s work. I wanted to keep all of you away from this kind of life, but now you are tangled in it. We should have left," lanie said, regretting she stayed.
Life was miserable since they returned to Lockwood.
lody shook her head, failing to grasp her mother’s words. They stayed because her mother had another life here. It was closer to where lanie’s parents were when they were alive.
They were to be making up for the ti lanie missed with Alessandra.
lody touched her forehead. "You must give a mont. You didn’t answer what I asked you. Do you want her now? Have you ever wanted her since the mont she was born, mother?"
lody had sympathy for her mother in regards to being forced to have a child, but Alessandra was innocent in the matter. How could her mother look at Alessandra and not have wanted her?
Was this why lanie found it easy to abandon Alessandra?
"Mother!"
"Oh, stop your whining. I gave you all my love from the mont you were born. I loved you because I wanted you. You are my heart and soul. I cannot feel that way for a child I never wanted," lanie said, tired of pretending.
lanie wanted to go back to the good old days when it was just her and the family she cared for. There was too much she had to face since she ca back to Lockwood.
"I gave her father what he wanted, so he was ant to take care of her. I only wanted to be a mother when I found your father. I don’t feel anything when I look at her. She doesn’t feel like my child," lanie explained her feelings.
All lanie saw when she looked at Alessandra was Desmond, even though Alessandra looked more like her mother.
Alessandra served as a reminder of lanie’s past as the wife of a baron, which was why lanie didn’t want to talk about what Alessandra endured. lanie wanted to move on, so they didn’t need to bring up Desmond’s na, but Alessandra was stubborn.
"I don’t get the sa feelings I have with you when I look at her. You will understand it when you are married and have children with a man you love," said lanie.
"No, mother. I don’t think I ever will understand it, and it won’t take marriage to change my mind. So, all this ti you have felt this way? All this ti, it wasn’t only that you thought her father would care for her, but you didn’t think of her as your daughter," lody said, the cold truth hurting her.
This wasn’t about lody, but her heart couldn’t stop aching for Alessandra.
"Do you realise how this sounds, mother? Do you realise how it makes you look in my eyes now?" lody asked.
lody was starting to see her mother differently.
"I am still your mother. You are to stay in your place and respect my decisions. You have all placed her as the only victim, but I was a victim as well. Or, does it not matter that he was my husband when I beca pregnant?" lanie asked, frustrated that her issues were ignored.
"Mother, I think we have all concluded that your late husband was a terrible man. I will never have a good opinion of him, but that doesn’t change that I don’t like what I hear from you. She is my sister," lody said.
"Since we returned, I have not stopped you from getting to know Alessandra. She is your sister, but there isn’t a bond between us. I cannot help it, and since your sister does not want to move forward with , you must all accept it. I am done," lanie declared.
lanie had done as best as she could considering her feelings, but it was never enough.
lanie didn’t harbour any motherly feelings for Alessandra, but she had genuinely cared for her grandchildren.
Isabelle was the one lanie cared for now. She was certain that Lily and Elijah were going to follow Penelope’s lead to be disrespectful.
"It is ti that we go ho," lanie said, wanting to get far away from the room.
"No," lody replied, refusing to go with her mother. "How can I go with you after what you revealed? I feel guilty."
"You shouldn’t feel anything. It is not your fault that I fell in love with your father. I wanted to have children with him, so I did. You didn’t steal anything from her. Don’t feel guilty," lanie said, trying to reach for lody’s hand.
This was why lanie didn’t like that, after so many years, the court and Edgar had searched for her. Her children shouldn’t feel the slightest bit of guilt when they haven’t done anything wrong.
"Busy yourself with your work. This feeling shall pass," lanie said, certain of it.
"No," lody shook her head. "This feeling shall linger in for the rest of my life. I will not be able to look at my sister without thinking of how you view her. All along, I thought there was a chance for us to be a happy family."
lanie held out her hand to lody. "You cannot get what you want. Their family is not perfect since Edgar doesn’t speak to his father. No one forces him to be close to his father."
"It is not the sa," lody softly spoke.
lody didn’t know everything concerning Edgar’s troubles with his father, but she knew it couldn’t be the sa. Edgar at least grew up with his parents near him.
"It doesn’t matter what you say, mother. I will always feel like I have taken sothing that belonged to soone else. I thought you loved us all, but you didn’t," lody said, slowly backing away from her mother.
"See, you don’t think of how I feel. I was forced by my husband to have a child, but none of you pity-"
"I do pity you, but you had led to believe you want to rekindle your relationship with her. I have been trying year after year to get you two close to each other. Now, you say that you never wanted her. You’ve been acting for us," lody realised.
"You’ve been pretending so that my father wouldn’t hate you. You didn’t have anything bad to say when she helped find work, or Claire used Alessandra’s na to find a good husband. Even my brother has used the Collins na," lody pointed out.
"She might not feel like my daughter, but she is still your sister," lanie said. Alessandra could do sothing for her siblings who didn’t share her status.
"You never wanted to return, but if you had said that from the beginning, then my father wouldn’t have stayed. This has all been about pleasing him. Stay away from ," lody said, repulsed by the sight of her mother.
lody couldn’t stop thinking of the possibility of her mother falling out of love with her father and then moving on to soone else. Would lanie have still cared for her?
lody turned her back on her mother. She had to get far away from here.
"lody!" lanie called for her daughter, but it was no use since lody was gone.
lanie hated where this day was going to end when Lewis heard of this.
’We should have left,’ lanie thought.
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