Chapter 9 Part 2
****
“Daughter.”
I took off my earphones and raised my head to the voice of my mother calling from in front of the door.
“You don’t say about quitting school these days?”
“Uh… well, yes.”
“Are you bored a lot because you don’t have Hyun-joo? That’s why you’re going to school?”
It was unfamiliar to seeing my mother asking affectionately.
She sotis cos to her room with side dishes, hits back, and swears at the broken beer cans.
“No, it’s fun these days.”
While answering with no expression, I showed her my teeth and smiled.
Mom, who burst into laughter at my smile, said, “Thank God. Good night.”
“Yes, you too.”
Mother turned off the light in my room, closed the door and went out. Suddenly I fell into darkness. Although she was my mother in the past, strangely enough, it wasn’t a sad conversation, but I beca emotional. She was my mother 6 years ago, so she was still young. The tip of my nose was tingling and I frowned. It was not the ti to cry.
I pulled the blanket up to my neck and looked at the list of songs. There were songs that were popular at that ti and all of my favorite singers’ albums.
I listened to Lee Mun-se’s album so much that I was sick and tired of it. I played Lee Mun-se’s third album. I listened to the song while looking blankly at the black ceiling.
After Hyun-joo transferred to another school, I cried a lot while listening to this song. I suddenly rembered myself crying before I ca on a ti trip.
What if Seon-jae couldn’t reach the age of 24 even though I ca back in the past. My eyes turned red when I thought about it.
It hurts more to see Seon-jae smiling here without knowing his future. I frowned.
Tears from the corners of my eyes flowed down, drawing a hot line. Sungjae was so precious to that I wondered if this was how otaku felt.
I always wanted Seon-jae to be happier than and stay healthy. I kept rembering the articles I saw on the subway.
Seon-jae wore a hoodie and shorts, took dicines to shake off cold and to get a good night’s sleep.
It was very different from the Seon-jae I saw here. My throat was sore from crying that I could not feel anything anymore. I pulled up the blanket and covered my face.
Kkog, kkog
The unintended sobbing sound kept coming out.
***
“Oh my gosh.”
As I entered the bathroom to brush my teeth, I was amazed at the reflection on the mirror. The eyes were swollen as if stung by a bee.
I couldn’t see my eyes.
How do human eyes swell like this?! I was so bewildered that I couldn’t even think of turning on the water from the sink and kept looking at my face in the mirror.
“This is too much. My face.”
After looking at it for a while, I squeezed toothpaste on the toothbrush.
I had to go to school even if it was serious.
***
The temperature fell sharply and got cold, so I ca out wearing a scarf.
I was on my way while listening to the song in MP3 I found yesterday. I didn’t feel bad because the songs I listened to on my way to school wearing a school uniform, seed to bring back to the ti.
When I arrived at the school, I was flustered when I saw the flat plate in front of the school gate. I was so flustered that I closed my eyes and looked at it again. I opened my eyes wide and closed them. Nothing changed when I opened it.
Jagam High School,
Crazy, why am I here?
No matter how many days I have co to put a note in the wire drawer, how can I do this?
Is it this scary to be unconscious?
I took out my cell phone and checked the watch. 7:30. I thought I ca to school early today, but I was late even if I left now. I was about to turn around and run again the way I ca, but I bumped into soone head-on.
“Ugh!” As my body pushed back, the cell phone I was holding in my hand fell to the ground. “Oh, I’m sorry.”
The other person leaned down and picked up my cell phone and gave it to .
I bowed my head and got my cell phone. I raised my head and saw the face of the person who hit . I opened my eyes round because they were so swollen that they didn’t even get any bigger.
“Uh.”
Seon-jae looked into my eyes as if he knew the face, but he shut his mouth as if he didn’t want to pretend to know.
I cried thinking about Seon-jae all night, and I was surprised and happy to see his face like this. I laughed a little while fiddling with the cell phone. “Hi…”
“You’re not in this school, are you?” A little unkind voice ca out from Seon-jae’s mouth.
“Uh…” I nodded my head.
“I don’t know how you know , but this is stalking. Is it?”
“Oh? No, nothing like that.”
“How did you know my secondhand country ID?”
“I didn’t know it was you. For real.”
“Why did you buy gym clothes?”
“Oh, that’s… …”
“Why did you call to the snack bar?”
“Huh? No, that’s because I lost my bag…”
Seon-jae’s face was colder than the morning temperature. He, who was looking at my na tag with an unpleasant face, put his hand in his pocket and ca one step closer. “I don’t even have a fan cafe.”
“That’s…”
“I didn’t tell anyone that i entered the company.”
It was written on his face that he was displeased with what he didn’t like. Seonjae took one more step closer.
The distance was so close that I hesitated and took a step back.
“et one more ti at school.”
My eyes were swollen and heavy.
Like last ti, “i’ll kill you” words were in context, the sa words seed to be attached but they were not.
Seon-jae turned around and entered the school gate.
Last ti, he said to try calling his na one more ti.
This ti, he asked to et at school one more ti.
I thought it wouldn’t end with a glance if I ran into him after calling his na.
I looked at the back of Seon-jae crossing the playground and turned around. I didn’t feel like going back to my school because I was late.
It could be Seon-jae’s fault.
It’s not that I didn’t understand his discomfort.
Of course, Seon-jae, I have no choice but to do this.
The expression I saw just now seed to leave a scar for a long ti.
As I was going down the street, soone bent their upper body in front of and walked up looking at my face. When I lifted the scarf off my face, Baek In-hyuk, who opened his eyes wide, said with a surprised look as if he had been hit, “It’s you?”
Baek In-hyuk stood in front of who was walking with my hands in my pocket.
“What’s wrong with your eyes? Did you cry?”
I stuck out my lower lip and looked up at Baek In-hyuk’s face.
You’re so tall.
“Did you co to see Seon-jae from this morning? You are so diligent.”
“No, no. I ca here unconsciously. I’m not here to see Seon-jae.”
Baek In-hyuk looked at , who answered him, with an angry expression. Since the words ca out, I thought I should deliver them. I straightened out my index finger and pointed it out to Baek In-hyuk’s face.
“Please tell Ryu Seon-jae clearly. It’s not true.”
“What’s not true?”
“Secondhand country. I t him in the morning. It’s all coincidence.”
Baek shrugged his shoulders and nodded, “All right.”
After shooting Baek In-hyuk’s face and being grumpy for no reason, i went down the street with my arms moving.
As I glanced behind while walking, I could see Baek In-hyuk walking toward the school gate.
I’m not going to show up in front of them anymore.
I sighed and took a step again.
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