REAGAN POV
I stared into the fire that danced wildly in the chilly night sky, producing erratic dance of flas which sent sparks flying but even it failed to calm my troubled mind. Smoldering wood filled the air, mingled with sweat and iron of my sleeping n beside , whose mutterings were lost in the distant wail of the wind.
Sothing was wrong with this campaign to .
The experience left different because I had already experienced nurous marches and used steel and filled my tracks with blood during warfare. The king issued sudden orders containing minimal details except for their unspecific demands. One of our ancient enemies seed to threaten us but there remained no concrete evidence of their hostility because rumors silently spread through the people becoming quieter with each transmission. We were deployed to destroy them when they still carried no weapons before us.
They identified the plan as a campaign of caution. I could not release the worry that our actions were leading us toward sothing which differed from our original mission.
I heard footsteps coming towards only to see Nikolai one of my oldest friends walk with purpose towards . Under the flickering light of the fire I watched Nikolai approaching toward while his face remained blank. He approached with two cups held in his hands but remained silent before offering his cup toward my grasp.
I took the cup with a short acknowledgnt while the heat passed through to my hand before I drank. I gratefully accepted the alcoholic drink as it created a hot burning sensation which traveled from my mouth through my throat and blocked out the nervousness building within . Nikolai seated himself next to on the nearby log before resting his legs toward the fire while emitting a soft exhale.
"Alright now, what’s got you staring into the fire like a man haunted by ghosts?"
I arched a brow up only for him to shrug his shoulders. Taking another swig from my cup, I turned to stare at the fire. "Sothing about this campaign doesn’t feel right."
"Hells, nothing about any of the campaign we’ve been on feels right." Nikolai snorted in response, "But I will admit, this still feels a little strange, I an the Cossakani are friendly people and haven’t caused us trouble for years."
"Exactly, so why step into their land now? What exactly is their offense that made the king decide to sed us to their lands?"
"Because he is an insecure bitch?" Nikolai deadpanned.
I looked around, hoping no one heard my friend’s blatant lack of tact. The last thing we needed was so trust worthy soldier to report back to the higher ups.
"Nikolai," I growled at him but I couldn’t prevent the small smile that tugged at my mouth.
He shrugged at before he drank again, leaning on the log. "Please, I’m not the only one who thinks that, we all do. I just have the bigger balls out of y’all to be able to say it out loud."
I smiled into my cup knowing how right he was. Nikolai has always been the type of person to call things as he saw it. He was always too direct, saying things others were too say and he didn’t care about the consequences.
I sipped the drink and took ti for the burn to reach my heart before I released a controlled breath. "But still pay attention to what you choose to say when around people. The consequence of misreporting becos dangerous when the wrong person approaches authorities."
"Then I’d better make a hasty departure and let you get out of it." He leaned back in his seat, grinning, tilting his cup in toast towards . "Wouldn’t be the first ti."
I gave him a glance not finding any way to challenge his statent because it was true. Nikolai possessed unmatched abilities to create unwanted trouble while moving into his disastrous path. It was how we t each other in the first place, he landed himself in trouble and I was left cleaning up his ss.
Nikolai wasn’t just a friend, he was my brother!
"So, you really think this whole thing is so sort of trap?" He asked.
I sighed as I leaned back in my seat, "It just feels wrong, like I can’t put my hand on it."
"Hmm," Nikolai humd, "And you are sure it’s not just your head ssing with ya?"
Turning to look at him, I arched a brow up. "What’s that supposed to an?"
"Exactly what it’s supposed to an." Nikolai answered, "You’ve been off lately, seeming distracted and looking way too murderous for no reason. I also think it has sothing to do with a certain dark haired green eyed beauty."
I shot Nikolai a look knowing damn well who he was talking about, Dahlia.
Just thinking of her na alone made my jaw tighten and I looked away from Killian, "This isn’t about her!"
"The hell it’s not!" Nikolai said, "For the past few weeks you’ve turned into this depressed brooding bastard who barely says two words unless it’s to bark orders and don’t think I haven’t noticed you staring off into the distance like so mystical hero in so of those books chicks reads nowadays."
I pursed my lips my hands tightening on my cup. "You are imagining things."
"Am I though?" Nikolai scoffed at in response, "Because it seems to like you are losing your head and it’s not in the ga anymore. I an you’ve got us all spinning around I can’t decide if you want to fuck her or just kill her and be done with it!"
Nikolai may be my brother but even this was him crossing the line. "How about you do a favor?"
"What is it?"
"Shut the fuck up!" I responded, pouring the rest of my drink away as I stood up from the log.
"I still think fucking her will give you so peace of mind though!" Nikolai called after and I swear if it were anyone else they would have t their demise a long ti ago.
I walked past the flas, my boots crunching a trail in their wake atop the dried dirt and leaves. The night air cut against my skin, a chill that contrasted the heat rising from beneath it. My hands balled into fists at my sides as tension rolled through like an incoming storm.
Dahlia.
The brand of her na etched itself into my mind so deep that no matter where I marched she remained there.
Nikolai wasn’t wrong. That was the worst part.
I had been off lately. I had been distracted. A part of wanted to bring Dahlia back into my embrace while another part desired to remove her existence permanently from my life forever.
I didn’t know what she did to and sohow her presence haunts . The day I left I was a little bit disappointed I didn’t get to see her but I did catch her spying at through the window of the house where she moved into.
Watching her duck out of the way when I spot her had made feel warm on the side because it ant sowhere deep down she still cared about , so why the fuck does it bother and why the hell did I find it cute?
By the hells, maybe Nikolai was right? Perhaps what I needed was so good fucking to drive the image of the beautiful dark haired beauty with ocean green eyes that seed to haunt wherever I go.
I should be furious. I should feel nothing. I should be advancing ahead without any care like I typically do.
A small ache in my chest combined with ntal turbulence kept assessing the sa fatal question repeatedly in my thoughts.
I should be angry yet I do not understand the reasons why she permitted my departure if she still cares about . She watched walk out the gate without bothering to hold back and try to explain herself to . I guess she beca tired of doing that since I didn’t give her a chance to whenever she tried.
Groaning I rubbed my hand on my face, perhaps I made a mistake when deciding to go ahead with the plan.
But the plan would have been fine, I would have succeeded perfectly with my sche provided I didn’t touch her. I wished to keep away from her because the magnetic force that drew us together turned out to be fatal.
Touching her had been a mistake and now my whole life tumbled upside down because I can’t seem to focus on anything. I lost focus on what’s important because she had occupied my mind and consud every part of what used to be clear thinking.
I’m being haunted by the one girl I swore never to fall for, I’m being haunted by the dark haired girl with ocean eyes!
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