*Cat*
I didn’t sleep that night.
With the clock endlessly ticking the hours in my ear and how I felt both too cold and too hot, I shifted between Elio’s embrace and the edge of the bed in an attempt to get comfortable, but none of it worked.
Every ti I closed my eyes, I saw Junior, his sadistic grin from my mories rging with the one I’d seen today. I kept imagining I was hearing a gunshot, with blood on my palms as my Mom bled out in front of and his back as he ran like he hadn’t barged in to shatter my world.
It was maddening to know that he was now back and able to reach anyti. But what bothered the most was what would have happened if Emilia had been with . If Junior had seen the family I had made, well, I kept rembering the promise he’d made back when I was trapped under his thumb.
‘You’re nothing without ,’ he’d sneered. ‘I will make it my mission to destroy anything that brings you happiness if you leave , then I’ll drag you back to my side to be miserable together.’
His words still burned, especially now that I had sothing I wanted so desperately to protect.
Elio slept soundly, much to my ire and relief, completely unaware of my struggles as he dread. Eventually, I started tracing the freckles on his back, trying to count sheep in my mind to fall asleep.
It worked, but the restless sleep had waking before the sun had even risen. I finally gave up on sleep for the night, gently climbing out of bed so I wouldn’t wake Elio. He had work early this morning and I had to take care of the last few plans for the wedding.
I pulled on my fluffy robe, the stone floors cold on my bare feet as I left the bedroom. I stopped in to check on Emilia but much like her father, she was fast asleep, completely unaware of the rest of the world.
I headed downstairs and to the kitchen. The cooks weren’t even here yet, so I fumbled in the semi-dark to make myself so coffee. The sll of the brew in the early morning helped greatly with refreshing my mind, and I sat down at the table with my favorite mug filled with a darker-than-I-normally-drank coffee.
I took a sip, wincing at the bitterness, but it certainly helped to keep awake.
God knew I needed it.
But the longer I sat there in the empty space, up way too early with bleary eyes, the more I realized that Junior wasn’t leaving my mind. Like a virus that had invaded and taken up every corner of my thoughts, I grew more anxious by the minute.
What was Junior’s plan? Why did he threaten in broad daylight just to drive away, leaving and Anna unhard? Why even co at all? Just to make a statent?
There was sothing deeply wrong about the whole situation, but I didn’t think like a psychopath so once my head started to hurt, I decided to give up. But my thoughts took a new turn this ti, toward Elio’s family.
Giovani and Olivia had told us why they had left the business, handing it down to Tallon, who left once he got married to his wife and they had a child. And even before them, Elio’s grandparents had left too.
It was a pattern that I was beginning to understand.
The kidnapping of their son had deeply traumatized Olivia, and though Elio didn’t rember it because he was so young, I was starting to understand why his parents had decided to leave the family, and why Tallon and Natalia had left before the birth of their own child.
Fear.
Being a mother to a beautiful baby girl myself, the constant threats one after another had taken their toll on , and though I had Elio by my side, I was growing weary.
Antonio, Katz, Ignacio, and now Junior–it felt never-ending, like they were all the sa enemy who always ca back to terrorize us, just changing his face and na each ti.
Elio kept telling it was over after they caught the bad guy, that we would be safe, but then soone else showed up to take that place and we had to worry and stress out about him.
We always ca back victorious, but was the damage that happened along the way really worth it?
I was so tired now, sitting at the kitchen table all alone, missing hours of sleep because I was worrying about people who were after my family. I was envious of Elio, who was confident in his ability to overco this new threat, jealous of Emilia’s innocence as she had no idea soone else was after her life... but most of all, I was scared.
I was terrified that this would always be our life, chasing after so new threat and losing sleep over and over again until I finally cracked and went insane. Or worse, that a new threat would finally get too big for us, that the gamble we played would finally co up with our loss.
I tightened my hold on my mug, breathing shakily.
I didn’t even know what I wanted at the mont. I loved our little life and loved being involved with the family. The danger, as much as it was terrifying, was also exciting as I never knew what would happen next.
Monotony had never been my strong suit, but....
I felt like a little stability and fewer surprises might be better for our family, especially Emilia. I felt guilty even thinking about it, after how hard we’d found it to involve ourselves in the family, how hard Elio had worked to take the position of Don here.
But I couldn’t help the one anxious thought that surrounded like a bitter icy wind.
if Junior found out about our daughter, about this little bit of happiness I’d made for myself, he’d do anything in his power to crush it.
And I wasn’t sure there would be anything I could do about it.
I’d made myself busy by the ti Eli woke up, deciding to make breakfast on my own to keep my thoughts from drifting back to the dark ones. I knew Elio had noticed my quietness but didn’t question , which I was thankful for.
After breakfast, Elio had to head off to work and he wrapped in a hug from behind, kissing my cheek.
“You sure you’re okay?” he whispered worriedly. “You’ve been quiet all morning.”
“I’m just tired. I got up a little earlier than I planned,” I put on a fake smile, reassuring him with a lie so I didn’t worry him too much. I didn’t want to tell anybody how I was feeling right now, especially not Elio, at least until I figured out what I was feeling and why, and what I wanted to do about it.
Elio didn’t believe . It was clear by the look on his face. But he sighed, not pushing for answers as he gave a quick kiss. “I’ll et you later at the wedding planner’s office. You’re eting the band at noon, right? For the setlist?”
“Yes, don’t be late.” I gave him a playful grin.
“I won’t, I promise.” He laughed, stepping away to pull Emilia out of her now ssy high chair.
He washed her face, changing her clothes and once he ca back, they were both ready, Elio in his nice suit, looking confident and handso, and Emilia in a cute little onesie with a tutu skirt, her hair pulled into ponytails that her daddy did for her every day.
Ever since her hair had gotten long enough to actually bunch them up, he’d been learning from and my mom about how to do her hair up, taking those extra special minutes in the morning to fix her hair.
Normally, it would lt my heart and I’d shower them both with complints. But I only smiled, taking Emilia from him as he kissed her forehead, kissed once last ti, and then was off. It was only when I heard the door shut that my smile fell and I slumped over.
It was going to be a long day.
I focused on spending ti with Emilia all morning, watching her favorite cartoon with her and even getting on the floor to play pretend. I even helped practice walking with her, which was more of encouraging her to stand on her feet and then helping her up when she fell on her bottom again.
But she seed to enjoy it, so that was all that mattered.
When it was about eleven o’clock, I grabbed Emilia, helping Tony and the other guard set up the car seat before we rolled off to our wedding planner’s office. Once we arrived, Tony went inside with to ensure we were safe, which luckily our wedding planner didn’t mind.
She was certainly getting paid enough to overlook the few oddities of our case. Mostly, I think she just assud we were a high-class family or celebrities keeping it on the down low. But she didn’t pry, which was why we had chosen her.
I t the band and we went over so of the songs Elio and I had chosen, though it was a bit awkward seeing as Elio still hadn’t arrived. Despite his promise to be on ti, he was late. Again.
It was fifteen minutes past when Elio strolled in, apologizing frantically. It turned out he didn’t really need to be there either as it was mostly and the wedding planner choosing the setlist. Elio threw in a few suggestions, but I could tell he was distracted and mostly didn’t care too much.
The seating charts, however, were where Elio shined. Seeing as it was mostly his family, he wasted no ti in dividing up the tables, though I was a bit concerned by a few of the tables he said were just reserved for ‘Cousin Capone’s.’
Still, our wedding planner’s discretion was top of the field, only giving a wide smile and nodding along, though I could tell she had her suspicions brewing in the back of her mind.
By the ti we left, Emilia had started getting fussy, clearly not happy to sit still, and Elio decided to drive us ho himself.
He told all about his eting with Franky, giving the details, which very quickly soured my mood. Going from wedding planning to hearing about the efforts to catch Junior was like night and day.
There was just too much bad blood between us.
But I did feel a little better hearing that he was being tracked, and that he wouldn’t be able to get near us again.
But the nagging feeling in the back of my mind, the small desire that was blooming into an insistent need, wouldn’t leave my mind.
It was the one that scread that we needed to get out of this life.
But I didn’t say a word to Elio, keeping my tongue tied and my mouth shut. Because saying those words aloud felt like betraying him.
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