*Olivia*
My head was swimming unpleasantly as I slurped down the last of the daiquiri mixture inside the pitcher. I thought I was being efficient by foregoing the glass, but now I saw the error of my ways–I had no idea how many I had actually drank.
And instead of the daiquiris washing away my anger, I found that they had sharpened it. I had planned on sitting in the bath until I relaxed, but not much relaxing was going on. I just kept replaying what had happened between and Giovani over and over again, and every ti I replayed the scene in my head, I got angrier about how it had all gone down.
I was angry with myself for not just keeping quiet in the first place. Then I was angry with myself for thinking I shouldn’t be allowed to just ask Giovani if everything was okay. Then I was angry with Giovani for being a massive prick. And finally, I was angry with myself all over again for not speaking up for myself in the mont, and instead, cowering like a scared little girl. I had thought myself in angry circles until the daiquiri was gone.
“None of my concern, my ass,” I muttered to myself angrily as I finally hauled myself out of the tub.
The water had started to turn cold, and I shivered as I stood up. I felt a twinge of regret as I stood there alone and shivering, my lips and tongue no doubt stained a grueso red.
A part of felt pathetic. Instead of confronting Giovani, I had swallowed my pride and hidden how I really felt. Then, instead of confronting my feelings about that, I had chosen to try to numb them with alcohol. Now, I was just wet, cold, alone, and pretty wasted.
I delicately got out of the bathtub, terrified that I would trip and crack my head in my drunken state. The dark thought crossed my mind that Giovani would really regret yelling at if I died in this stupid bathroom. An insecure part of whispered that he might not regret it that much, but I shook that away.
No matter how angry I was, I could acknowledge that he did really care about .
I reached over for one of the fluffy white towels that had been hung by the sink and wrapped it around myself, happy that it stopped my shivering. I was in the middle of checking just how red my mouth was when I heard a knock at the door. I had a bad feeling that I knew exactly who it was.
I wrapped my towel tightly around myself and answered the door. As I had expected, it was Giovani. He at least had the good sense to look ashad. I rolled my eyes at the puppy dog look he was giving , then stood back to let him in.
I wasn’t anywhere close to being ready to forgive him. If he thought he could just co in here and charm into forgetting his harsh words, then he had another thing coming.
He closed the door quietly behind himself as I plopped down on the bed. I tugged at the top and bottom of my towel, unwilling to give him even the smallest peek at my body. He didn’t deserve it.
When he turned back toward , I realized I was too angry to stay seated and stood back up, swaying just slightly on my feet. I decided to let the alcohol do the talking for . I wasn’t going to cower and hide like I had in the kitchen.
“What is wrong with you?” I asked angrily.
I had intended to say sothing a little more eloquent, but I found that I was too drunk and too irritated to think of anything.
“I’m so sorry,” he said simply.
His short response only fueled my anger. If he thought I would accept such a weak-ass apology, he could walk right back out that door.
“Why the fuck did you think it was okay to treat like that?” I practically shouted in his face. “I was worried about you! I care about you! But instead of communicating like a fucking adult, you decided to treat like dog shit in front of my friend. Do you know how fucking embarrassing that is? Here I’ve been sneaking around with you, risking my reputation for you, and you don’t give a fuck. You have no idea how much I’ve put on the line for you!”
“I know, I know. I’ve put a lot on the line too, Olivia. I know the sacrifices you’re making,” he murmured in a soothing voice.
I wasn’t ready to be soothed.
“No! You don’t know, actually! Because you’re not from my world, Gio. You don’t get what it’s like to grow up like I did! I had to watch every step. I had to learn to hold my tongue, sothing you obviously never figured out.”
At this point, I knew I was mostly just rambling, but I couldn’t stop myself. The daiquiris had taken control.
“I will never allow myself to be treated like that again,” I spat, pointing my finger into the middle of his chest for emphasis.
And I realized that I was telling the truth. I wasn’t so girl hiding inside her shell. I was a grown woman, and I was going to stand up for myself.
“That’s good, because I don’t want you to,” he said softly. “I’m ashad of myself for ever speaking to you in such a dismissive way. I never thought that I would be capable of being so disrespectful to a woman that I respect greatly. I’ve been so stressed lately with work and Alessandro... I just forget what’s really important sotis. But I always want you to call on my bullshit. I don’t trust anyone else to keep in line the way I trust you.”
I felt my anger start to dissipate at the genuine emotion in his voice. I could see on his face that he really ant what he was saying. He wasn’t just bullshitting to try to get to forgive him. He truly regretted what he had done. But I wasn’t quite ready to give it up just yet.
“Well... good, because I’m always going to call you out. You know how I feel about you. You know I’m on your side. I don’t ever want you to talk to like we’re enemies. I will always be on your side.”
And with that, my fire went out and left with nothing but a growing pool of warmth in my heart. I wasn’t sure if I had ever had an argunt like this with soone before. It felt amazing to know that we could forgive each other and that even when we were angry, we had each other’s backs.
As I gazed at Gio’s face, I noticed that his eyes had lowered, and I beca aware of how much my towel had slipped since I had loosened my grip on it. My breasts were damn near all the way exposed, the only thing keeping the towel up was the tightness of my nipples. Gio glanced at the two little nubs hungrily, as if he’d love to rip the towel off of and see just how hard they were.
Instead of pulling the towel off, he leaned down and kissed chastely on the lips, not even going so far as to press his tongue into my mouth. He cupped my face in his hands and caressed my cheeks tenderly with his thumbs.
His kiss felt like a question, like he was asking if we really were okay, if I really ant it when I said all was forgiven. If his kiss was a question, mine was the answer. I kissed him back greedily, sucking his lower lip into my mouth and biting it gently. He sucked in a loud breath, then finally gave the kiss that I really wanted, the one that made feel like nothing existed except for us.
He wrapped his arms around and squeezed in a tight hug as we continued to kiss like our lives depended on it. When he pulled away from the hug, my towel went with him. It landed on the floor between us with a damp thud.
He leaned back just long enough to look up and down with appreciation, then leaned back into the kiss, one hand cupping my breast and playing with my nipple, the other wrapped around my lower back, gently caressing before pushing lower. He squeezed my ass at the sa ti as his other hand tweaked my nipple, and a small moan escaped my lips. He really knew exactly what I liked. He slowly moved his hand from my ass to my thigh, his thumb rubbing small circles as he went.
But just as he began to slip his hand in between my legs and move his mouth down to my aching nipple, I realized that I wasn’t ready for us to fully be together again. Although I had forgiven him in my mind, my heart still felt bruised. My body pleaded with my heart to just let him continue to pleasure , but I knew that if I went ahead now, I would regret it later. Pressing both hands against his chest, I gently pushed him away.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” he asked, his eyes glazed over with lust.
“I really want you,” I said. “But I think I need to spend the night alone. I just need a little more ti to think.”
He looked a little disappointed, but he didn’t pressure to change my mind. Instead, he leaned down and kissed on the cheek. I turned into the kiss so that our lips t once more. He brushed his gently against mine before pulling away.
“I understand, baby,” he said. “As much as I’d love to get you into that bed right now, I wasn’t planning on coming here to get you to sleep with . I knew I wouldn’t be able to go to bed until I had apologized and made sure that we were okay.” He leaned over to grab my towel off the floor, wrapped it tightly around my shoulders, and kissed again, softly. “Sleep well. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He left, and I was alone with my thoughts once more. My head was still spinning, but now I wasn’t sure if it was because of the alcohol, the anger, the making out, or all of the above.
I decided to stop dwelling on it and instead try to get so sleep. I replaced my towel with my favorite pair of pajamas and curled into bed. My head had already started throbbing, and I wasn’t looking forward to the hangover I would have tomorrow, but at least my heart was on its way to being healed.
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