Sleeping With The CE Chapter 109: Sudden Case Of Cowardice

Chapter 109: Sudden Case Of Cowardice

All along, Derek had known that he was missing Emily, he had not lied to himself on that front, in fact he had been brutally honest about it. But not even being honest with himself could co close to actually revealing just how much Derek had missed her. Saying that he had missed her a lot, felt like an understatent.

He had really missed her. From the way that she slled, the closest things that ca to mind when she passed by close enough for Derek to get a whiff of her scent was...spring. It was a scent that reminded him of sunshine and flowers all rolled into one. Even hearing the sound of her footsteps had him feeling more at ease. He had never thought that he would miss anyone to the point of being comforted by the sound of their footsteps but Emily was proving to him that he could. And she was not even doing it on purpose, she was just being Emily and Derek already felt all warm inside.

When she returned, she had with her his order, as she had promised. And just as she had suggested, there was a chocolate chip muffin, and so tea. It was nothing special, nothing to write ho about, but sohow, the simple fact that Emily had been the one to give him the food made it taste a million tis better. It felt as though he was getting a little taste of heaven.

After Emily had quit, food had beco sothing that he only ever rembered sotis. And even when he did manage to eat sothing, he was not eating because he was enjoying it. Food had beco just sothing that he occasionally made ti for, because his body needed fuel in order to keep going. He had not been enjoying it at all. But now that he was eating a al that Emily had brought, Derek was suddenly realizing just how hungry he had been all along. He barely managed to keep himself from wolfing all of the food down, just barely managing to restrict himself to small bites and tiny sips of tea. Years and years of etiquette lessons helping him retain control of himself.

His mother, as well as several of his regular associates would have been quite shocked to see Derek in such an easily forgettable place. But Derek did not care about any of that. Not caring what people thought however did not an that Derek was not ashad. Even as he ate he was very ashad, but it had nothing to do with the establishnt that he was in.

No, the thing that brought Derek sha was himself. He was doing it again, taking and taking from Emily. He had co to apologize, but instead he was enjoying Emily’s hospitality. Enjoying being served by her in a place that she was way over qualified and over experienced to be working in. And all because of what he had done.

A lie that he had told in a bid to keep her, terrified of what the future would look like without her by his side.

The muffin began to taste like ash, the tea suddenly bitter. Guilt overwhelming him and taking away his enjoynt of the food.

But even though it no longer tasted as good as when he had begun, Derek still forced himself to eat. He would have loved to say that it was a form of punishnt that he had constructed for himself, but deep down he knew that it was not.

He was stalling.

Taking the smallest bites possible, and then when those seed to be too big, he tore the baked bread apart with his own hands. Breaking it into smaller pieces to justify taking so long to finish eating. He was still very hungry, despite eating so slow, and taking such small bites. But just as he had physical hunger, Derek also had emotional hunger. And he was feeding that hunger by stealing glances and watching Emily whenever he thought her to be preoccupied with sothing else.

He had missed her so much that just the simple act of watching her wipe away so spilled water on a random table brought a tear to his eye.

Derek wasted so much ti eating slowly, and stealing glances that a group of custors finally ca in. Police officers by the looks of them. One of them gave Derek a suspicious look, like he was expecting Derek to just stop eating, pull out a gun and start shooting.

Ignoring the man, Derek finished off his al and sat for a bit. Given the size of the group, Emily was working hurriedly, scribbling down their orders and then heading to the kitchen to hand them over to the cook.

No doubt, she would need a bit of rest after they had gone to recover. Derek could not burden her with a hurried apology, by pulling her to the side and telling her that he was sorry when she still had custors to serve. Nor could he wait and apologize after everyone had gone. That would be taking advantage of her exhausted state.

Even as he ca up with his reasoning, Derek felt like a coward. But that did not stop him from placing the money for the bill in the nu, and then emptying everything that he had in his wallet and making that the tip. It felt as though he was using money to solve his problems, but it also felt as though if he just left then he would be an even worse coward.

Tomorrow, he would be sure to co back the next night and apologize. With that promise to himself, Derek left with only a nod in Emily’s direction when their eyes briefly t.

Later on, after the group of police officers had left. Emily would open up Derek’s nu and be absolutely shocked. While he had thought nothing of leaving behind all of the money in his wallet, for her it was quite a big deal.

There was around a thousand dollars in there for the tip. Going into the kitchen, Emily split the money with the cook, the quite man almost looking as though he might break into a smile before he controlled himself and set his usual stoic mask in place.