From birth through his adolescence, the concept of calling soone mother was entirely foreign to Kiritsugu.
As far back as he could rember, he had only his father. There was no mother in his life.
So when Natalia once talked to him about family, Kiritsugu's first reaction was, "Do you want to be my father?"
Of course, she imdiately scolded him.
"Don't mix up the genders, you rude little brat. At the very least, you should say mother."
And that beca Kiritsugu's first impression and mory of what a mother could be.
If there was truly anyone who could be his mother, it would undoubtedly be Natalia. There would be no one else.
He had dread many tis of calling her "Mom," but when the ti ca to say it, he found himself unable to speak. His awkwardness left everyone feeling unfamiliar with the usually composed Kiritsugu.
"Hey, you can't just stay like that. Show so guts and own up to it," Natalia complained, clearly displeased.
"Where's the decisive kid from back then? Or were you lying when you said I was your family?"
"I wasn't lying!"
"Then say it."
"M..."
"M what?"
"M... Mom..."
After a mont of blushing and hesitation, Kiritsugu finally uttered the two syllables.
"Louder, I can't hear you. Did you skip a al?"
"MOM!"
Kiritsugu shouted in frustration, giving up on any subtlety.
"Ah..."
Even Natalia was montarily stunned.
She had waited years to hear him say that. And so had he.
Now, this day had finally co—fate, that mischievous force, had for once played out in their favor.
Feeling both excited and proud, Natalia slamd her hand on the table and said loudly, "Say it again!"
"No way, I'm not letting you ss with anymore."
By this point, Kiritsugu had regained his composure, his face now cool and detached, a tactic he had always used with Natalia.
Natalia, though only faintly influenced by the succubus blood in her veins, wasn't the type to seduce n left and right. However, it did affect her personality sowhat. She had a habit of spending money lavishly—whatever she earned would be quickly blown in places like casinos or bars. She also tended to tease Kiritsugu whenever she could.
Back when Kiritsugu was still a young boy, he would often flush red with embarrassnt, but the more embarrassed he beca, the more Natalia would tease him. Eventually, he developed the habit of responding with a cold expression. Seeing Kiritsugu's emotionless face would often make Natalia lose interest, and this ti was no different.
"If you won't say it, soone else will—your wife, Irisviel, right? Kiddo just called mom, so as his wife, shouldn't you also call mom?"
"Mom?"
Irisviel, who wasn't nearly as shy as her husband, tilted her head in confusion and innocently repeated the word.
"Mom."
"See, kiddo? Learn from your wife," Natalia teased Kiritsugu while nodding approvingly.
"Maiya, you should call her mom too," Irisviel said in her usual straightforward manner.
"M-?"
Maiya stamred, clearly not expecting to be dragged into this.
"I-Is that okay?"
"As long as you want to," Natalia replied gently, nodding. She felt a stronger fondness toward Maiya because she saw a reflection of herself in her.
"M-Mom..."
Maiya's reaction mirrored Kiritsugu's. As a war orphan, she had never called anyone by that title, a word so charged with aning.
At this point, Illya decided to join in on the fun.
"Papa's mom is Grandma. Grandma!"
"Yes, yes!"
Natalia burst into laughter, a laughter she hadn't experienced in a long ti.
All the past grudges and unpleasantness seed to dissolve in that mont of joy.
Next, it was soone else's turn—the person who had influenced Kiritsugu the most, his first love.
"Kerry..."
"Shirley..."
They exchanged a familiar gaze, using the sa affectionate nas from their childhood. But the eyes that t were no longer the sa.
Shirley's eyes were no longer the beautiful amber they once were; they had turned a strange shade of red, a color that once again reopened the deepest scars in Kiritsugu's heart.
Kiritsugu's eyes, too, had lost their youthful brightness, now filled with the weariness of soone who had experienced too much and borne too many burdens. They were the eyes of soone who had matured through endless suffering. This maturity pained Shirley deeply.
"I'm sorry..."
"I'm sorry..."
They spoke at the sa ti, their words perfectly in sync.
"Why are you apologizing..."
"Why are you apologizing..."
Once again, they were in perfect harmony.
Kiritsugu's earlier denial, and Shinji's verification of their identities, now seed unnecessary. This level of synchronization could only co from people who had lived together for a long ti, and who knew each other intimately.
"You go first."
"Okay, I'll go first."
Finally, they broke the synchronization, but their understanding remained intact.
"I... I couldn't save you. If I had realized your true feelings a little sooner, maybe you wouldn't have ended up like that..."
Shirley was the embodint of Kiritsugu's purest dream.
Only in front of her could he reveal his softest, most innocent side.
Only in front of her could he be the carefree boy he once was, not the cold facade he later adopted.
"Why are you apologizing? You didn't do anything wrong, Kerry."
Shirley, who still looked like a young girl, spoke softly, her voice as light as the sea breeze from the day they first t.
"It was all my fault. I was jealous of you. I wanted to prove that I could be like you. That's why I stole the teacher's dicine and ended up like that... It was all my fault, caused by my greed."
Kiritsugu's fists clenched tightly on their own.
"Kerry, you don't need to apologize. If anything, I'm the one who should apologize. Because of , Alimango Island ended up like that. Because of , everyone died. And I forced you to make such a terrible choice... It's all my fault."
"No, it's not! It's not..."
"It is, so don't comfort , Kerry. You never were good at that. You're smart; you've known the truth for a long ti, haven't you?"
"Ugh!"
Kiritsugu slamd his fist onto his leg, his nails digging into his skin. Just as Shirley said, he wasn't good at comforting others.
"I heard from Miss Natalia. The path you took, the pain you went through—it's all my fault. I wanted to see you again just to apologize. I'm sorry, Kerry. You deserved a brighter future, a better life, and I..."
Shirley's body trembled as she spoke, almost choking on her words, though no tears flowed. Dead Apostles don't cry—they can only shed blood.
"Kerry, bla , hate all you want. I just want you to live each day happily, like you used to..."
"Like before..."
Kiritsugu closed his eyes and shook his head.
"I can't go back to that ti."
"Kerry!"
Shirley panicked and was about to speak when Kiritsugu continued.
"Even though I can't go back, I can promise you that I'll live happily from now on. I can do that now."
"Yes, you definitely can."
Irisviel held her husband's hand as she slowly relaxed his clenched fist. "You have , you have Maiya, you have Mom, and you have Sister Shirley—"
"And too!"
Illya, not wanting to be left out, eagerly chid in.
"We will be happy."
That pure, innocent wish shattered the cold exterior Kiritsugu had built. Tears—ones he thought had long dried up—flowed once again after so many years.
"Yes, we will be happy."
PS: I've always believed that writing fanfiction is about fixing tragedies in the orignal. That's why Shinji gave Kariya so hope and changed the fates of Sakura and Fujino. And as for Kiritsugu, Shinji wanted more than anything to give him a happy ending.
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