Shattered Sanity Chapter 40: Making His Mind

The logical part of Riven’s mind knew exactly what the correct choice was.

It wasn’t that he failed to understand that leaving with Garron represented the best possible outco under the current circumstances, because from every rational perspective, following the recruiter south toward the Empire offered him freedom, safety, training, and a future that he could never hope to find within Frost Valley.

However, whenever he tried to embrace that future and force himself to leave behind his hatred, his grief, and his desire for revenge, sothing deep within him resisted with an intensity that bordered on physical pain, as no matter how desperately he wanted to move toward Garron, his body simply refused to obey.

*Tremble*

A violent shiver spread through him.

His hands shook.

His shoulders trembled.

Even his legs began quivering beneath him as though they no longer possessed the strength to support his weight.

’Move...’

’LET IT GO...’

’JUST GO AND LIVE YOUR LIFE, DAMN IT!’

Riven scread at himself internally, as every logical instinct within him fought desperately to force his body forward, however the voice of reason found itself hopelessly outmatched by sothing far older and far stronger.

Hatred.

In the end, the part of him that wanted revenge simply refused to yield.

And because of that, his feet never moved even a single inch, as he remained rooted to his spot trembling.

anwhile, Mary was the first to notice that sothing was wrong with him, because while the other recruits had already started gravitating toward Garron and the future he was offering them, Riven remained standing alone near the edge of the training grounds, trembling so violently that even from a distance she could tell sothing inside him was breaking apart.

"Riven... it’s going to be okay. I know leaving the only place you’ve ever known feels overwhelming, but I promise you that leaving Ashfang is the right choice."

Mary said gently, as she placed a reassuring hand upon his arm in an attempt to calm him.

However, the mont Riven finally looked up at her, every remaining word died in her throat.

Because the expression staring back at her did not belong to sobody who looked frightened, nor did it belong to sobody who looked confused.

Instead, it looked like the expression of a man who had lost his sanity and was currently being controlled like a puppet by the demons in his head, as for a mont she wondered whether or not he was still fully conscious?

"Riven? Riven, can you hear ?"

She asked, as for several long seconds, Riven’s gaze seed to pass straight through her rather than settle upon her, while the whites of his eyes remained unnaturally prominent, giving him the appearance of sobody who was physically present yet ntally sowhere else entirely, causing an involuntary chill to run down Mary’s spine as she suddenly found herself wondering whether he could even see her at all.

"Riven...?"

She whispered.

"Riven, are you okay?"

Her voice sounded noticeably less confident now, as she felt terrified of what she was looking at, however, thankfully, Riven’s eyes refocused on her at this mont, with his bright green pupils returning to their usual place.

First he looked at Mary.

Then toward Stacy standing behind her.

And finally toward Garron, who remained waiting patiently in the distance, as he moved a couple steps towards Garron and said—

"Instructor... what direction will you be heading?"

He asked, as his voice that was usually so docile and weak before Garron ca out unusually strong, as the tremors that had gripped his body so far slowly subsided.

"Hmm? South."

Garron replied while raising an eyebrow, as he casually pointed toward the distant horizon.

"Roughly that direction. Although if you turn back today, boy, I highly doubt you’ll ever find again."

Garron warned, as though having seen through Riven’s intentions.

However, despite his warning, Riven simply followed the direction of Garron’s finger and silently committed it to mory before nodding firmly.

"I’ll take my chances, Instructor."

He said before turning around and attempting to leave as Mary suddenly grabbed a hold of his arm.

*Clutch*

She held him tight, the expression on her face turning desperate, because unlike the other recruits whom she did not care about, she genuinely believed Riven to be a friend and did not want to see him make a horrible life choice.

"What are you doing?"

Mary asked, as her voice rose noticeably.

"Have you completely lost your mind?"

Her grip tightened.

"The village is under attack. People are dying. What do you even expect to accomplish by going back there?"

She questioned, as for a few monts, Riven remained silent.

Then he gently pulled his arm free from her grasp.

"I need to do sothing before I leave."

He replied quietly in a voice that carried no uncertainty or anger.

"Otherwise, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life."

He finished, as the mont those words left his mouth, Mary felt her stomach sink, because she understood at that mont that nothing she said was going to stop him, as she helplessly stared at his back as he began to run away.

"RIVEN! Turn back!"

Mary shouted, as panic imdiately entered her voice while she instinctively took several steps after him, unable to believe that he was actually running toward the village.

"YOU IDIOT! YOU’RE GOING TO DIE!"

Stacy scread monts later, as both sisters watched him disappear further into the distance, their voices carrying across the training grounds while the sounds of battle continued echoing from Ashfang Village.

However, despite their desperate attempts to stop him, Riven never once slowed his pace or looked over his shoulder, as he simply continued sprinting toward the burning village with his wooden sword clenched tightly in his hand while the glow of fire gradually grew brighter before him.

Because although there were many people inside Ashfang Village whom Riven hated, there was only one man whose survival felt completely unacceptable to him, as no matter where life took him after tonight, he knew that if he left Frost Valley without personally punishing Hagrid for everything he had done to his mother and him over the years, then that failure would beco a regret that followed him for the rest of his life.