Chapter 109: 107 | Not Together
Winter got chills watching Blue slowly rise up from the floor. Once Blue was up, he straightened out his top with his hands, as though the biggest problem in the world was the wrinkles on his shirt. And not even the dried stains on his pants.
"Winter, why did you show up at the restaurant last night?" Blue asked with a composed voice after straightening his shirt, taking a step towards Winter.
Winter opened his mouth but no word ca out.
"Why did you beat up Adonis? Why did you bring
here? Why didn’t you touch
after bringing
here?" The more questions Blue asked, the more answers got caught up in Winter’s throat.
"Answer . If you don’t want
here, then why did you bring
here?" Blue’s composed tone almost wavered as he said this sentence but he steadied himself by tightening his fists at either side.
"Don’t get mad," Winter began to say.
A bitter chuckle escaped from Blue’s mouth before he said, "’Don’t get mad’? I’m not mad. I’m just asking you questions that I want answers to. Answer them now, Winter."
Winter pushed his hair back from his face before he said, "I don’t know. I just want you here. Is it a cri to want you now?"
"We’re not together anymore, I hope you haven’t forgotten about that. You don’t get to ’want’
anymore." Blue clarified with a detached voice.
"Blue, I didn’t agree to that breakup. It doesn’t matter what you think, we’re still together–"
"It doesn’t matter what I think?" Blue repeated Winter’s words with a question-like tone.
Winter imdiately knew that he fucked up with his choice of words.
"I didn’t an that. I just ant that I still regard you as my boyfriend and–"
"Well, I don’t regard you as mine." Blue instantly said. "Winter, do you know how much your actions torture ? Even the little ones that you might see as insignificant??"
"Blue, please. I want to apologize for getting mad at you at that ti and not believing you. I’m sorry." Winter took a step closer to Blue as he said these words.
Blue automatically took a step backwards, ensuring that there was a fair distance between himself and Winter. He was doing this because he knew how foolish he could get when he was close to Winter.
"Don’t apologize. I hate when you do. Because you know that I’m going to forgive you. It’s what you do all the ti. You believe apologizing is going to fix things. But it’s like slapping a tape on a completely shattered vase.
"Winter, I don’t want your apology. I just want to know why you brought
here and why you think you want
when you obviously don’t."
"Who told you I don’t want you?" Winter bit out.
"If you did, then you wouldn’t be acting the way you are!"
"How am I acting?!"
Blue stepped back again, pressing a palm to his forehead as he pointed at Winter, saying, "This. This. I hate this. Do you know how... peaceful my life has been without this constant arguing all the ti?"
Blue had wanted to use the word, ’miserable’, in place of the word, ’peaceful’. But what was the point?
"You say that like I’m the biggest problem in your life." Winter spoke with gritted teeth.
Blue didn’t revoke his words.
"Why do you have to be like this? Why do you choose to tornt yourself and
as well? Do you think I get happy seeing you angry or in pain? You know how I feel about you–"
"No, I don’t. I don’t know how you feel about ." Blue said without flinching.
"I care about you, Blue. You should know this." Winter said with an exhausted tone.
Blue felt like giving up everything after hearing Winter’s words. After all this ti, Winter still wasn’t going to say it.
"I don’t need your care." Blue said with a firm tone, then he turned his back to Winter and walked out the room.
This ti around, Winter was hot on his trail, grabbing his arm before he was able to take the stairs down.
"I’m not letting you leave
again." Winter said with a desperate tone.
"You don’t fucking deserve . Let
go!" Blue tried to free his arm from Winter’s grip but was unable to do so.
"I don’t deserve you? How can you say that? My entire life revolves around you! I do everything to make sure that you’re safe and happy, yet you don’t even appreciate .
"I’ve been understanding for so long that I don’t even complain when you hit . I don’t even say the things I want to say because I’m afraid that you’d be upset by them. I restrain myself from doing so many things just so I can keep you. Yet you’re saying that I don’t deserve you. How dare you??"
Winter’s voice was laced with venom as he spoke, thick rage-induced pheromones seeping out from his skin.
"Did I tell you to do any of those things?? Have I ever asked you to keep
’safe and happy’? Or not to complain when I hit you? Or to suppress your opinions? I never asked any of these things from you! The only thing I want, I don’t even ask for it!
"Yes, you don’t deserve ! I’m worthy enough to be treated with respect and real care from my significant other. I don’t want soone who wants to ’keep ’ or who complains about
expressing myself the only way that I can." Blue spoke at the top of his lungs, his chest heaving up and down as he breathed heavily.
There was silence after that. None of them spoke a word before Blue let out an exhausted sigh from his mouth and shifted his gaze to the floor.
"I want soone who understands . And that person isn’t you."
After saying those words, the entire world faded to black in Blue’s eyes.
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