Chapter 11
I held tightly onto Yanwang and bitterly wept. I begged him to let boil soup in the Netherworld for a few more years. Yanwang looked very conflicted. He was soft-hearted and looked at the magistrate a few tis. The cold magistrate only said: “The Netherworld’s justice is strict. People who are not to be punished, can’t be punished.”
I howled in pain: “I’m punishable. I beg you! You should punish for a few more years. It’s better if you punish for thirty or more. I’ll burn incense to thank you!”
The magistrate was unmoved. Yanwang sighed loudly, touched my head, and said: “Xiao Xiang Zi, don’t cry. You can’t escape sothing that’s fated.”
I refused to give in: “Why?! We obviously caused a ss again, so why are we not punished?!”
Yanwang picked his nose.
“Well, there’s no protest from anyone and it didn’t have a big impact on the Netherworld, so you won’t be punished.”
“I can go and pour out all the soup in the pot, which would delay all the souls that need to be reincarnated.”
The magistrate gave a cold look and said: “I advise you not to do it. That’s a serious cri for which you’ll be flogged.”
I lowered my head, crying at the unfairness of it all.
Yanwang bit his lips and said: “Well, Celestial Star Chu Kong needs to spend a lifeti of love with you. Since you’ll be an idiot, he won’t have it easy either.”
I wiped my tears and said: “He didn’t drink the Soup of Oblivion this lifeti. He’ll rember everything clearly, so he won’t like anymore. If I as a fool fall into his hands, I’ll die a cruel death or an even crueler death than that...”
“Well, you can’t be so sure,” interrupted Yanwang.
He searched for a while on his desk and took a double-sided mirror out.
“Look, in the past lifeti Celestial Star Chu Kong loved you deeply.”
I didn’t dare to look at the Lu Hai Kong reflected in the mirror. I was afraid that when I saw him cry, I’d cry too. Instead, I murmured: “That’s not Chu Kong.”
“Whether he is or isn’t is just your thoughts. Even he himself doesn’t know if he is or isn’t; how can you be so sure?”
Yanwang’s words were vague. He was like those stupid gods in heaven: speaking very beautifully, but with words that no one could understand.
I pinched Yanwang’s leg really hard and said: “Get to the point.”
Yanwang made a “sisi” sound and took two deep breaths.
“This thing called love is better if you, Xiao Xiang Zi, experience it yourself. ”
I increased my strength and pinched his leg. Yanwang very quickly said: “Magistrate, magistrate, quickly pull her away. Let her go back to boil soup. After three years, she can go and be reincarnated.”
I was ruthlessly dragged out. Before the door of Yanwang’s palace closed, I couldn’t help myself and peeked at the Lu Hai Kong reflected in the mirror. He was still young, but his hair had turned white. He was in front of an isolated snow-covered grave. Slowly, he poured wine onto the ground. It looked like his mind was sowhere else.
I felt like sothing was pinching my heart, making unable to breathe.
Each passing day, the days of making soup beca more and more painful. But no matter what I did, three years passed really fast. The little ghosts carried and threw into the circle of reincarnation.
“Fucking Chu Kong! Next ti I see you in the Netherworld, I’ll pull all your hair out!”
Hair...hair...hair... In the reincarnation circle, I kept on repeating that last word.
After a while, I lost my senses.
Dida dida.
A sticky liquid kept dripping against my ears. It was silent for a mont, and then in the next there were many voices.
I didn’t know how much ti has passed. The liquid stopped dripping.
Soone lifted the wooden lid above my head. The light of the sun was blazing. A boy’s face appeared before . Mother said that when seeing a boy older than , I needed to call him big brother.
So I obediently said: “big brother.”
The boy was disgusted when I called him that.
“In this lifeti, we t at such an occasion! Bastard Heavenly Emperor Li1.”
I stared at him blankly. He frowned and also stared at . He looked very confused.
Suddenly a gruff voice called: “Shaozhu1.”
The boy bit his lips and put the wooden lid back over my head. The sound of his footsteps went further and further away.
I continued to sit down in the barrel, holding my legs. Mother said she wanted to play hide and seek. If she didn’t find , I couldn’t go out. But it’s really strange...obviously, it was mother who put in here. How co she still hadn’t found after such a long ti? Was it because the adults were eating sothing delicious and didn’t tell ?
I used all my strength to push the lid away and climbed out of the barrel.
“Mother,” I yelled while walking. I didn’t see anyone in the yard. There was only blood everywhere: it looked the sa as when the cook killed a chicken. I was very unhappy: “Eating chicken and they didn’t call ?”
I searched in the kitchen and in my parents’ chamber, but I didn’t even see their shadows. I walked into the hall and saw a bunch of people in black kneeling on the floor. The only one standing with his hands behind his back was the little boy. I was happy and yelled: “Big brother, did you see my mother?”
The people in black turned and looked at . One person stood up and ca to while carrying a bloody sword. I blinked and asked: “Are you guests? Is it you who helped the cook kill the chicken? But where’s the cook?”
The man in black coldly said: “You’ll see them soon.”
He raised his sword. Blood dripped onto my face. I blinked and stared at him.
“Hey, drop the sword,” the boy said.
The man in front of hesitated for a mont. The boy continued: “Let her go back with us.”
All the people in black began to talk: “But Shaozhu, she...”
“I said bring her back.”
The boy walked over to and stood beside the man in black. He stared at for a mont. Suddenly, his face was in front of . He said in a soft voice: “Originally, I wanted to let you fend for yourself, but you still fell into my hands all on your own. With that being the case, I’ll kindly accept you.”
He pinched my cheeks.
“Xiao Xiang Zi, what do you say? Should we bully you, or should we seriously bully you, or should we severely bully you?”
He laughed.
“No matter what, thinking about the future is making indescribable happy, haha!”
“My na isn’t Xiao Xiang Zi, it’s Yang Xiao Xiang.”
I blinked again and looked at him.
“Big brother, pinching my cheeks hurts.”
He loosened his hand and looked at with a smile. It looked like the kind of smile that the cook wore when he caught a fat pig.
“From now on, your na is Xiao Xiang Zi. Be my...well, disciple. What do you think?”
“Not thinking,” I said. “Mother killed a chicken and she didn’t let eat it yet. I’m not going with you.”
“Your mother went to my house to eat chicken. You need to co with .”
I thought for a mont: “Are dad and cook also there?”
“Everyone is there.”
“Big brother, lead.”
I stuck my hand out in front him. The boy paused. He hesitated for a mont before holding it. Then, he coughed twice and said: “You have to call Shifu2 I’m now a generation older than you. You need to respect .”
“Yes, big brother.”
“It’s Shifu.”
“I know, big brother.”
My forehead was in pain. He had flicked my forehead. I touched it, and though I felt a bit wronged, I still said: “Shifu...”
He nodded in satisfaction. He looked like he was in a really good mood...
I hadn’t seen my parents since the ti I left ho with Shifu. Shifu said my parents entrusted to him and that I only needed to listen to him.
I scratched my head. I didn’t understand the aning behind those words, but Shifu didn’t look like a bad guy. I decided to be obedient.
Only after arriving at Shifu’s house did I discover that his na was Chu Kong. He was eight years old and the Shaozhu of Shengling Sect. All the people of the sect were full of praises about him. Wherever I went, I’d hear that he was a genius, a prodigy. The praises went on and on.
But Shifu didn’t take those titles to heart. He was obviously only three years older than , but he always pretended to be an adult.
He liked to order around. Always making do all sorts of things like making his bed. Even on a cold day, I still had to fan at his bedside.
In the beginning, I didn’t think that there was anything wrong. After all, the food Shifu gave was quite good. Every one of them had many different types of ats.
But after a long ti, I began to think it was very strange. Finally, one day, I realized why when I heard the sect people talking.
“Shifu, I should not call you Shifu.”
At the ti, Chu Kong was reading a book on the couch.
His eyes lightly swept over .
“What objection do you have, ah? No need to ntion it. I don’t accept it.”
“But...”
I was very frustrated.
“They said I’m your little wife, whom Shifu is raising.”
Shifu’s body went stiff. He was silent for a mont, turned a page, then asked without much feeling: “Who said that?”
“They.”
“Next ti, if soone talks about that gossip again, just kick him directly in his crotch.”
“Alright,” I answered and continued to fan him.
Later, so people really talked about that “gossip” in front of . I did exactly as Shifu told and bravely kicked his crotch. But my kick was only halfway when he grabbed . The martial arts of the people in the Shengling Sect was not bad. That day I suffered a hard beating.
I cried out loudly, making Shifu, who was reading in his room, co out. The mont he appeared before with a frown on his face, all my grievances instantly broke out. I ran to him and hugged his waist, covering his clothes with my tears and snot.
Shifu’s body slightly stiffened. In a cold voice, he asked: “What is the aning of this?”
I whimpered and vaguely told him what had happened. But it seems like Shifu hadn’t heard a word I said. He knelt. I took advantage of it, hugging his neck and putting my face on his shoulder. I grumbled, told him the whole story, and finally I just kept repeating, “My butt hurts, my butt hurts.”
Shifu seed very unhappy. He put his hand on my back and lifted . My legs naturally wrapped around his waist. My whole body was attached to him. I was still crying. Shifu wasn’t very tall, but he still could hold steadily. I heard him ask in a stern voice: “Did you beat her?”
The man who beat my ass muttered for a long ti before an “en” sound ca out.
“Why?”
He muttered again for a long ti: “She wanted to kick my...”
Shifu nodded. He seed to understand everything at that mont. He took two steps forward and said: “Open your legs.”
I heard a pumping sound. I didn’t understand why, so I temporarily stopped crying. I rubbed my face against Shifu and changed my position to look at the man who had beaten . The man’s face was green for a mont. He was in a squatting position. The man had seen Shifu’s flying kick; he had shook, but he’d still firmly stood there and taken the blow.
Shifu said: “This ti will only be a light punishnt. Next ti, if I hear that you’re talking about things you shouldn’t be talking about behind my back...”
Shifu stamped on the floor. The white jade brick broke apart with a “balabala” sound.
“Your crotch will be like this brick.”
Shifu turned around and walked away handsoly while still holding .
But after two steps, he paused. His faint words were: “And do not bully sothing you shouldn’t bully.”
I didn’t understand his words, but after that day, the way the people of Shengling Sect treated changed dramatically. When eating, my bowl had more at. And also after that day, I got a few new requirents from Shifu.
He held my face and said: “Why do you look more stupid in this lifeti...”
I was gnawing on a chicken foot. With a mouth covered in oil, I dazedly looked at him.
Shifu frowned in disgust. He let go of my face. While wiping his hands, he said: “Well, you’re still young. However, soone that I, Celestial Star Chu Kong considers an enemy shouldn’t be too weak. Even being bullied by a passer-by...you’re degrading , a celestial star.”
“Shifu, can you speak words I understand?”
I tried to discuss with him, but Shifu didn’t seem to hear a thing. He looked at for a mont. Suddenly he said: “En, I’ve decided. You’ll start learning martial arts today. I, Celestial Star Chu Kong, will personally teach you.”
“What’s learning martial arts?”
“It’s a magic skill for when, in the future, if you want to kick soone’s crotch, you won’t be picked up and beaten again.”
I thought for a mont and decided that this thing was really important, so I obediently nodded.
Comnts:
I decided to call Emperor Li Heavenly Emperor Li. After all, he’s the Emperor of Heaven. I called him Emperor Li for ten chapters. He may hold a grudge against and make my next lifeti a hell. So I’ll now obediently call him Heavenly Emperor Li.
少主 (Shǎo zhǔ): 主 (master, lord) this is what the Chinese call a master of a sect. There’s 少 (little) before 主. Chu Kong is the little master of a sect师父 (Shifu): this also ans master, but it’s used by disciples
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