Self Insert as Spide 72 Home Is Where The Heart Is

I used my palm to access the extra buttons in the elevator and chose B1. Instead of going down like I expected, it went up two floors instead and the elevator doors opened to reveal Maria Hill.

“Priority override. Very nice.” I complinted her.

Maria's lips twitched before she waved for

to follow her. We went back to her office and she shut the door.

“I'll get you to smile again soday. I just know it.” I comnted and she ignored it.

“I wanted to deliver this to you myself.” Maria said and took out an envelope from her tunic.

“You've conscripted

into your reverse harem, haven't you?” I asked with a grin. “I knew you couldn't resist the temptation.”

Maria's lips twitched again and she raised a single eyebrow at .

“What? I can always hope.” I said as she handed

the envelope. I opened it and whistled. “Please excuse my cursing.” I said and she nodded. “Jesus H. Fucking Christ! This is a TWO WEEK PAY?!?”

Maria let a chuckle escape before she could stop herself. “At $150,000 a year, broken down by-weekly, cos out to be $5,769.23 for the gross. With taxes and deductions for the governnt to cover your pensions, dical, and life insurance, it knocks you down to $4,289.75 for the take ho pay.”

“Fuck.” I whispered. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

“What is it?” Maria asked.

“How am I going to explain this to Aunt May?” I asked.

Maria reached over and put a hand on my arm. “It's only for the three weeks that you're working for the holiday break. You'll drop to half pay when you go back to school and the accounting departnt will switch to automatic deposit to your bank account for that.”

“Oh, thank god.” I said and briefly put a hand on hers. “No wonder you wanted to deliver this yourself. If it had been anyone else, I might have freaked out about them playing a practical joke on .”

Maria looked a little pleased at that. “Then I am doubly glad I brought this, too.”

I stared at her as she pulled out another envelope. “Oh, fuck .”

Maria's lips twitched again and she handed the envelope to . “This is for the keyboard patent.”

“I... I don't know if I want to open it.” I whispered and she looked expectant. “I assu you bought

out, because you don't want to market it until it becos too prolific to keep under wraps?”

Maria nodded. “We've included a provision for future sales, just in case we do decide to change our minds. You won't get as big of a cut as you would have if you owned the patent, however.”

“I'm surprisingly okay with that, considering you could have cut

out completely.” I said and slowly opened the envelope. I sucked in a sharp breath at all of the zeroes on the check. “Maria, you're killing

here.”

Maria gave

an actual smile and I didn't react, because she had pulled out another envelope to hand to . “For the noise clickers.”

I took it without a word and opened it, only to see the sa number of zeroes as on the second check. I didn't know what to say. I really didn't. I had thought I knew what owning a patent ant and I thought I had so idea of how much it would be worth if it was presented right and sold well. I had been very, very wrong. I closed all three envelopes, tucked them into my inside breast pocket, and I gave Maria a very significant look.

Maria's smile disappeared and her eyes widened as I stepped close. “Agent Parker, I suggest you reconsider your next action...”

“Please, call

Benji.” I whispered and I wasn't surprised to see that she was exactly my height, even wearing nearly identical boots. I gently took her into a hug and tenderly kissed her like she was an old lover.

Maria remained stiff for several monts, even though her mouth moved to accommodate my ministrations, then her muscles relaxed and her arms went around my waist. I knew I really shouldn't be kissing my boss like this, then ntally berated myself, because she had just made

a millionaire.

We stayed like that for several minutes and enjoyed the feeling of each other's lips. Neither of us tried to push it to be more than that, and for so reason, I was perfectly fine with that.

*BEEP*

I broke the kiss and took out my cell phone. “Damn, I completely forgot I was supposed to et Agent May to drive

ho.”

The look on Maria's face was difficult to read, because I had admitted that she distracted

that much.

“Please excuse my behavior. I had to thank you for making so of my imdiate dreams co true, which just so happened to make another dream co true.” I said and her eyebrows rose, because I had implied kissing her was what I ant. “I'll accept any punishnt you see fit for crossing the line at work, Deputy Director Hill.”

“At work.” Maria whispered.

“Of course. Outside of work, all bets are off.” I said and ducked my head slightly as I gave her the best inviting smile that I could. “I fully expect you to call

about our date as soon as possible and you should fully expect

to ravish you afterwards.”

Maria stood there with a blank face and stared at

as I walked by her and opened her office door.

“Have a great evening, Deputy Director.” I said and left her office as I closed the door behind . I rode the elevator down to B1 and t a slightly irritated linda when the elevator doors opened.

linda gave

a pointed look as she stepped inside, so I took out one of the patent purchasing checks to show her. Her pointed look turned to shock.

“Yeah.” I said and put the check back into my pocket. “Deputy Director Hill took

to her office to give

that and my first paycheck.”

linda nodded and we left the building, quietly talked about what to make, and made another grocery run to her favorite spots for the best ingredients. We went back to my apartnt and started cooking. I skipped doing chores this ti and stayed in the kitchen with linda. The food needed a constant eye kept on it and we shared tasks easily.

May ca ho and the three of us had a very enjoyable al and even better conversation. After dessert, I was glad to have linda there for support when I told Aunt May about the office buying a new patent idea that I had. The look on her face was a mix of disbelief and anger, until I reassured her that they had their own patent registry and lawyers whom had filed all the appropriate paperwork for it to not be stolen.

“What was it?” May asked.

linda took sothing out of her pocket to show her.

“A pen?” May asked and then gasped when the thing was unrolled to reveal a keyboard pad.

“You carry one on you?” I asked linda.

“It's very versatile, Ben.” linda said and quickly rolled it back up and tucked it away. “Everyone at work loves these things.”

May looked from her to . “I don't want to know how much they bought that for, do I?”

“Are you prepared to faint?” I asked her and her eyes widened. “Because it's a lot. Like, a lot a lot.”

May took several breaths and nodded.

I handed her one of the checks and she barely had it out of the envelope before she fainted and slumped in her chair.

linda softly laughed and then coughed. “I really shouldn't laugh.”

I chuckled and took the check back before I carried May over to the couch and laid her down on it. “It's okay. I did warn her, because I knew she would take it like this.”

linda sat beside May's feet. “You really care a lot about her, don't you?”

“I really do.” I said and lightly pet May's hair to get it out of her eyes. “Having family... having soone care about you more than you care about yourself... really puts things into perspective.”

linda nodded and her hand took my free one. She gave it a tug and I took the cue as I moved down to May's feet, lifted them, and sat down beside linda with May's feet on my lap. The look in linda's eyes was conflicted, as if she didn't really know what to do with , now that she had

right there beside her.

“We will always be good friends, linda.” I whispered and put an arm around her shoulders.

linda gave

an odd look. “I've never had a male friend that didn't want to do more than be friends, Ben.”

I smiled and leaned in to kiss her cheek. “You know what I do with May practically every night when I'm not working, so you know it's possible.”

“Yes, that... I'm not sure why I...”

“It's okay to be envious.” I said and she looked unsure. “There was so sexual tension between May and I for a while, until we made it clear that even if we do get turned on, nothing has to happen. That's not the point of spending ti together. It's the comfort and closeness that we need. That our bodies have a normal biological reaction to each other is no reason to be embarrassed.”

“You... you both...”

I nodded. “I've been tempted to call her Aunt Hottie a few tis and I didn't, because I don't want her to be uncomfortable. I tell her she's beautiful all the ti, though. She needed to realize that even if I do find her extrely attractive, I don't have to act upon it and I never have.”

“Never?” linda asked and I shook my head no.

“I haven't kissed her on the lips, either. That's not really sothing best friends and roommates do.” I admitted and then chuckled. “Unless, you know, they are those kinds of roommates.”

“Best friends?” linda asked, catching the key words in my statent.

“I know that sounds a little weird, considering our apparent ages.” I said and linda nodded. “It's just... I promised her I would be the best roommate in the world... and it's kind of hard to not also be best friends. We go shopping together, we hang out as much as possible, and we joke and laugh and carry on... it's the best friendship I've ever had in my life. If that doesn't an she's my best friend, I don't know what would ever qualify.”

“Ben.” May whispered as she sat up and she had tears in her eyes.

“May, are you okay?” I asked and she didn't say anything as she pulled her feet off of my lap and leaned close to wrap her arms around my neck.

“I'm perfectly fine, Ben. Perfectly fine.” May said and cried as she hugged

close.

I took my arm from around linda and hugged May back as she lightly sobbed on my shoulder. “It's okay. It's okay.” I whispered and rubbed her back.

May eventually stopped crying and let my neck go. “I feel the sa way.” She said and wiped at her face. “Dammit, now my make-up is ruined.”

I chuckled and pointed up the stairs. “Go ahead and make yourself look pretty again. I can wait for however long you think that's going to take, even though you know I don't believe you need it.”

May shook her head and smacked my arm. “You're not supposed to tease , rember?”

“I'm sorry I'm not sorry.” I said and she softly laughed.

“I'll be back in a few minutes.” May said and stood as she looked at linda. “I'm sorry you saw

break down like that.”

linda shook her head. “You don't have to apologize. I almost felt like crying myself.”

May smiled and went upstairs.

I waited until I heard the bathroom door close before I turned to look at linda. “Like I told you before, it's okay to feel envy about that.”

“It's more than just envy, Ben.” linda whispered and took my hand to put my arm back over her shoulder. “Desire, need, want, greed, and a few other emotions that I really don't want to admit to right now.”

I chuckled and hugged her with the arm over her shoulders. “I'm going to focus on the desire part and ask you if there's a pool nearby where I can stare at you in a bikini.”

“Ben!” linda said and then chuckled herself. “I'll only wear a bikini if you wear speedos.”

“Deal!” I said and she looked surprised before she leaned into my side. “This is going to be the best Christmas ever.”

“Oh? Why is that?” May asked as she ca down the stairs.

“I'm going to rent a hotel room for the three of us and we're going to enjoy so relaxing winter swimming in a heated pool.” I said and she looked surprised. “What? It's not like they'll let us use the pool without buying a room first.”

May lost the surprise and nodded as she sat down on my other side. “I suppose I could dig out one of my old swimsuits from the storage bins in the basent.”

“Bite your tongue, woman! We're going shopping for new stuff tomorrow!” I proclaid loudly and both May and linda let out laughs. “You can both help

pick out so reasonable presents for my friends, too.”

May and linda exchanged happy looks and nodded.

*

Unlike the last ti I deposited money into my bank account, it took the account manager half an hour to confirm that the $500,000 check was legitimate and the funds were available from the proper accounting firm.

The woman looked fairly relieved when she hung up and finished the transfer. I waited until she asked if there was anything else she could do for

before I took out the second check and handed it to her.

“Oh, fuck .” She whispered as she stared at it.

“Surprisingly, that was also what I said when it was given to .” I admitted. “I also kissed her for about ten minutes to thank her.”

The account manager looked surprised, as did Aunt May.

“To be fair, she just made

a millionaire and she is a strikingly handso woman.” I said and both won nodded in understanding.

The account manager put the check through without bothering to play phone tag again to confirm it. She opened her mouth to ask

if there was anything else and then shut her mouth as I pulled out a third check.

“Relax, this is just my holiday pay.” I said and the woman accepted it and started the deposit process. “I would like it in cash, please.”

“That's not a problem, sir.” The woman said and did so typing. “I've also increased your draw limit to five thousand a day or one major purchase. That you will be called about, however.”

“That's great, thank you.” I said and she smiled before she left to get the money.

“Ben, why are you cashing that last check? That's a lot of money to carry around.” May whispered.

“I intend to spend a good portion of it, that's why.” I said and May looked surprised. “It's Christmas and I'm a millionaire already. I've already called Matt and he has the corporation forms for us to sign.”

“I almost forgot about that.” May said.

“I didn't.” I said and took her hand. “Selling those patents doesn't change my plans. I'm still going through with everything and you're going to be right there with , Miss CEO of Parker Incorporated.”

May shook her head. “I still can't believe you can do that and I haven't even taken one business class.”

“Money talks, May.” I said as the account manager ca in with a thick stack of bills in her hands. She counted out the amount of the check and I was quite pleased to see all of the different denominations.

“We deal with several clients that want the cash for quick and easy purchases.” The woman said and sat down behind her desk. “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“I might call later to transfer so money into another account for my lawyer and my checks from work will be going direct deposit from now on.” I said and she nodded as she made a note of both things. “I also want to thank you for being a great sport about all of this.”

The account manager gave

a huge smile. “I'm always glad to help a preferred client, especially because you received the money legitimately.”

I nodded in understanding and stood. “I appreciate you ensuring that was true.” I said and held a hand out to her. She took it and shook it, then shook May's hand. We left the office and t linda in the main waiting area.

“Any problems?” linda asked and joined us as we walked out through the bank's doors.

“Just the red tape over such a high denomination check.” I said and she nodded. “You're driving, so where do we go first?”

“I distinctly rember soone on their hands and knees as he begged to see

wearing a gold colored bikini.” linda said and unlocked the car.

“Hey, it was one knee... and I was praying, not begging.” I corrected her.

linda gave

a satisfied smile and May let out a laugh.

“Just get in the car.” I said and climbed in myself.

Both won laughed and we drove off to sohow look for a bikini in the middle of winter. This was New York, though. They sold everything here and we were sure that our search would be fruitful.