Shen Jingwei sat on the bed, hugging his legs to his chest and resting his head atop his knees.
Dark clouds hung above his head, painting him into the very picture of gloom.
As he locked himself up in his hotel room, people kept coming to check up on him.
Zhu Dongyi was kind enough to intercept them, allowing Shen Jingwei so respite from explaining himself.
His phone kept ringing with ssages, phone calls, and notifications.
At one point, he decided to turn it completely off and toss it aside.
He did not want to talk to anyone.
He just wanted to be alone.
Two days had already passed since his breakdown on the set.
He had pulled himself together almost imdiately, demanding a re-take.
"I can do it," he said despite his tear-streaked face. "I can do it, please let do it."
They let him, but he failed every ti.
After three failed attempts, Yan Renzhong exhausted his patience. He held a hand up and refused to attempt another take.
"You are not feeling well," his verdict hit Shen Jingwei ruthlessly. "You should go back and rest."
Everyone talked about encountering acting difficulties from ti to ti, but no one had a one-size-fits-all solution. Those seeking to excel in acting had to develop their own strategies to combat this recurring problem, no matter how seasoned or talented they were.
Shen Jingwei understood as much.
Still, he hated disappointing everyone.
He ca into the drama as a Z-Lister with zero experience in serious acting roles. Getting the male lead role was already a stroke of luck he knew he would never get a second ti. All he wanted to do was give his best and not beco a hindrance to anyone.
And now he was stuck in a scene, unable to move forward. Thanks to him, "Dance Of The Dragons" had to be put to a halt, save for several scenes that did not require him and Yan Renzhong acting intimately with each other.
Shen Jingwei let out a sigh as heavy as heaven and hell combined.
The door to the bedroom area opened, and a wary Zhu Dongyi poked his head through the door.
"Little Shen?"
Shen Jingwei gestured for him to co closer.
"Are you feeling better today?"
"No."
He felt awful, and that was the understatent of the year.
Zhu Dongyi sat next to him and gingerly patted his shoulder.
"Little Shen, I talked to Director Ma. We agreed that these past several days might have exhausted you physically and ntally. Look, I have already cleared your entire schedule for the next week. Why don’t you go on a trip to clear up your mind? Or maybe you want to spend so days at Nanwu Town?"
Shen Jingwei shook his head.
"I don’t have the face to go back ho. I would rather lock myself up in my apartnt and think about a solution."
"Maybe you just need a partner to rehearse your lines. I can help by reading Yan Renzhong’s lines."
"No."
The problem did not lie in the lines or the scene itself.
The problem was rooted deep within him, a festering wound that no external factor could heal.
"I just want to be alone for several days. I will call if I need anything."
"Oh."
A hint of disappointnt colored Zhu Dongyi’s voice, but he masked it to spare Shen Jingwei’s feelings.
"Then... Let make the necessary preparations. Let’s go back tomorrow, alright?"
"Yes, thank you."
Zhu Dongyi left the room, and Shen Jingwei slumped sideways on the bed.
He held out both hands in front of his face and looked at them in a daze.
He disliked being touched by Yan Renzhong, but the re thought of kissing him sent a shiver of disgust down his spine, giving rise to a primal abhorrence that coiled deep within his soul.
He also knew how it ca to be.
It was the single "I love you, too" sentence he heard while listening in on Yan Renzhong’s conversation with his lover that night.
Shen Jingwei had never felt more pathetic in his entire life.
So his first relationship was founded on lie, so what.
So Yan Renzhong never loved him, so what.
Did it even matter?
They still broke up in the end.
It should not matter the slightest.
Look at Yan Renzhong.
He did not care that much.
Every hug and every kiss they shared and would share during the filming of the drama did not an anything. It was what the script demanded.
Shen Jingwei sighed.
He should stop attaching his own feelings to every intimate exchange.
The ones who were involved with each other in "Dance Of The Dragons" were not Yan Renzhong and Shen Jingwei but Zhang Fengxi and Xie Jianyu.
Shen Jingwei pressed a hand against his chest, seeking to quell the suffocating feelings in his heart.
Just like that, the tears, which he believed he had wept dry in the past two days, returned to remind him of the depths of his despair.
Arghhhh.
He dissected his circumstances using every logical approach he had, but his heart remained impervious to reason.
He might be acting out Xie Jianyu, but he was Shen Jingwei, not Xie Jianyu.
And Yan Renzhong was still Yan Renzhong, not Zhang Fengxi.
The sa man who broke his heart again and again.
Shen Jingwei’s eyes fluttered shut like weary sails, surrendering to the gentle breeze of slumber.
He slept throughout the night.
And when he opened his eyes again, morning had already arrived.
Shen Jingwei and Zhu Dongyi checked out of their hotel rooms.
Shen Jingwei’s streak of misfortune seed to be far from over yet, because he just had to run into Lang Yuxuan before his car arrived.
"Senior Shen."
Lang Yuxuan had a bright and sweet smile plastered all over his youthful face when he ca over to greet Shen Jingwei.
"I hope you are feeling better right now."
Shen Jingwei chuckled softly. He was pretty sure that the opposite was true.
"How attentive of you."
"We are all worried about you," Lang Yuxuan continued. "So people are wondering if you can continue playing Xie Jianyu at this point."
"Oh?"
A blend of haughtiness and arrogance passed across the younger man’s face as his gaze dipped, then returned to et Shen Jingwei’s.
"I would certainly not have any problem acting out any intimate scene with Senior Yan."
--------------
Author’s note :
Mini theater!
Emperor Yan’s wife doesn’t want to kiss him because of his garlic breath.
Concubine Lang : I don’t mind garlic breath at all. I eat garlic every single day. I love garlic, second only to His Majesty.
Empress Shen : Go eat so garlic and leave alone! (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
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