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~ NYSSA

I stared at the safe, unable to move, at the blinking keypad and the four digit screen waiting for to push in a number.

"I’m impressed," Rowan murmured. I nearly jumped when I heard his voice so close to , I hadn’t even heard him move. "Did you know this was here?"

"I wouldn’t be standing here with my mouth wide if I did."

I reached for the keypad but quickly snatched my hand back when I realized sothing important. "I don’t know the code."

Behind , Rowan frowned. "It has to be sothing simple right."

"I doubt it. It was hidden in the bookshelf. Maybe the code had sothing to do with the books and the way they were arranged."

I turned to the books that were now sitting in a neat pile on the bed and cursed. I should have paid more attention to it before I started pulling it off the shelf.

"Maybe it’s the day they were mated," I offered. "Or the day they t. Or it could be sothing else entirely and I’m just over here fucking deluding myself."

"When is your birthday?" he asked.

The question caught off guard. I blinked twice, but he rely urged to speak. "August fifth. What does my birthday have to do with anything?"

He brushed past without speaking and pushed four digits into the keypad.

It took an embarrassingly long ti to realize what he was doing and once I did, I rushed forward to grab him.

"Don’t! It could be—"

There was a loud beep and the safe door opened with a small crack.

I stood there absolutely dumbfounded, my mouth left ajar. I blinked twice, glancing over at Rowan who didn’t seem surprised in the slightest. He just pulled open the safe to reveal stacks of huge brown envelopes, a small black box and a leather bound journal.

"You should be the one to get them," he said. "They were your parents."

"How?" I turned to him in shock. "How did you know the code? Did you see it sowhere?"

He shook his head. "No."

"Then how did you guess my birthday? It could have been anything."

"Not really. It had to be sothing important and I think other than a mate, the next most important thing is a child. You are their only child, and when they died, your father had a picture of you in his pocket. It was the only logical answer."

I swallowed the thick knot that ford in my throat, staring at the docunts in the safe.

For them to keep it hidden, then it had to be important. It was exactly what I was searching for and yet, I couldn’t reach for it.

Now that the answers were within reach, I couldn’t help but wonder if I truly wanted them or not.

"You don’t have to look at it now," Rowan said softly. "You can just take it and look at it when you have ti."

"I think I’d like that. Can you help grab a bag from the closet? My mum had a bunch of totes that I can use."

"Of course."

We packed up the things from the safe as well as the rest of the books. Thankfully, there were no other safes to be found.

Once I was done packing up my parents stuff, I went to my room and grabbed a few of my things I had left behind; nothing important, just a few stuff with a lot of sentintal value.

By the ti we finally left the house, the sky was already dark but Rowan was adamant that we did not stay to rest. We stopped to grab sothing to eat from a roadside shop. The store owner was an older man who stared at us with wide eyes and shaky hands. It was a miracle he didn’t pass out while serving us.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" Eric asked, leaning against my side of the car while we waited for Rowan while he grabbed our food.

"I don’t know," I admitted.

"Sounds complicated."

I couldn’t help but sigh. "It is."

"Whatever it is, I’m here if you want to talk to soone," he said, nudging with his shoulder slightly.

I smiled up at him. "I know."

Rowan picked that exact mont to step out of the store. Eric winked at before disappearing into the other car he shared with Jeremiah who had gone in with Rowan.

"I didn’t know exactly what you wanted," Rowan said as he shut the door behind him. "I got you rolls and—"

"I’m sure I’d like whatever. Thank you."

He turned to , lips turned down into a frown. "You’re worried."

"Of course I am. I don’t know what I’m going to find in those envelopes. What if I find out that my entire life was a lie?"

"What if you don’t?"

I scoffed. "Sohow, that will be worse. I’d have to live with the knowledge that they were horrible people. How can I support and love them despite that?"

"Two things can be true at once. My grandfather was a hard ruler. He hung more people for treason while he was King than in the centuries before him. To , he was just the old man who carried on his shoulders. I can acknowledge that he was a shit ruler but he was a good grandfather to ."

"Being a shit ruler is different from trafficking people."

"True, but the sentint still matters." He started the car. "We have a long journey ho. You can go through the docunts now if you want. There’s no audience to your reaction and you have the next few hours to process."

I snorted. "You only say that because you want to know what’s inside."

"I won’t lie and say I’m not curious, but I’m more worried about you. If you choose never to tell , I will be fine with that answer. I just want you to do what is best for you."

I stared at the tote bag between my legs, at the docunts that mocked , and yet called to .

With a sigh, I reached for it. "There’s no better ti than the present."

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